THE ARCHIVES:

Reprints of SUBGENIUS® Classics and Holy Texts

It's the best stuff from our most valuable collectors-item back issues! And we're giving it away for free!

WE MUST BE INSANE!!!

The Classics That Started It All:

• The Holiest of SubGenius™ Documents
  Including Pamphlets #1 and #2, The Brag of the SubGenius®, PRESCRIPTURES, and much more -- even the first chapters of THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS®!
• Classic Rants
  About 30 of the most brain-reaming, heartfelt, hate-fueled diatribes and harangues from THE STARK FIST (print editions), THE HOUR OF SLACK radio show, and Grandpa Dobbs' trash bin!
• 3 and 4-Fisted Tales Of "Bob"
  Yes! Now, ALL of the stories from the out-of-print anthology, THREE FISTED TALES OF 'BOB' are here FREE for your perusal (but not for copying or reprinting!) -- plus dozens of parables from the olden STARK FISTs!

The Holiest Of SubGenius™ Documents:

• THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS®
  Intro and Chapter One
• THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS®
  Chapter Two
• Pamphlet #1
• Pamphlet #2
• WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
  Ordainment Application Form and Questionairre
• THE PRESCRIPTURES
  (from The Book of the SubGenius®)
• THE BRAG OF THE SUBGENIUS®
  (from The Book of the SubGenius®)
  Now in TrueSpeech! You can hear it while you read it! YOU POOR PITIFUL FOOL!!!
• CHAPTER 19
  (from The Book of the SubGenius®)
• AD
  (The fully illustrated version of Michael Peppe's astounding rant, as it appeared in THE STARK FIST)
• THE SUBGENIUS® MEDIA BARRAGE TAPE
  ...Instructions and Warnings Booklet
• The Greatest JOKE (?) Ever Told?
  (old, nonfiction article about Church PRANKS)
• LONG Interview with Rev. Stang
  from GRAY AREAS Magazine
• "THE DEATH OF "BOB" DOBBS"
  AMAZING REPRINT -- NEVER PRINTED ANYWHERE!!
  -- a SUPPOSEDLY nonfiction expose on the first assassination of Dobbs, originally written for SPIN magazine but never used.

Classic Rants:

• YOUR INSTRUCTIONS
  by Space Puppet
• NAZI KEN-MALL ZOMBIES
• PROMOTIONAL RANT
  by Brad Parks
• NEW REALIZATION CHURCH WITHOUT "BOB"
  by NENSLO
• PUMPING "BOB"
  sermon by Father Joe Mama
• READY FOR THE FINALS, MR. DOBBS?
  open letter by Dr. G. Gordon Gordon
• BOMB RANT
  by Rev Ivan Stang
• MTV RANT
  by Rev Ivan Stang
• DRUGS RANT
  by Rev Ivan Stang

3 and 4-Fisted Tales of "Bob":

Three-Fisted Tales of "Bob"

• PLASTIC MODEL KIT OF J.R. "BOB" DOBBS
  by Paul Mavrides
• BEFOREWORD 
  by Dr. Philo Drummond
• IN REMEMBRANCE OF TIM McGINNIS
  by Rev. Ivan Stang
• SECTS AND DEATH
  by William S. Burroughs
• 199619971998
  by Rev. John Shirley
• THE THIRD FIST Part 1
  by Rev. Ivan Stang
• THE THIRD FIST Part 2
  by Rev. Ivan Stang
• THE SMOKER FROM THE SHADOWS
  by Dr. Hal Robins
• A WORKING RELIGION
  by St. Larry Sulkis
• STOMPIN' AT THE SAVOY
  by Rev. Lewis Shiner
• THE REAL STORY
  by Pope Michael Peppe
• LIFE AFTER X-DAY
  by Rev. Doktor Onan Canobite
• KILLING "BOB"
  by Rev. Brooks Caruthers
• THE END OF ALL BULLETS
  by Dr. Christopher Gross
• THE HORROR ON HOWTH HILL
  by Pope Robert Anton Wilson
• THE ALL-TOO-REAL DREAMS
  by Dr. Ahmed Fishmonger
• PILGRIMAGE
  by Rev. Ken DeVries
• THE OLOGY OF THE IZNESS
  by Dr. Christopher Gross
• THE VREEDEEZ SANCTION
  by G. Gordon Gordon
• IT TOOK A GENIUS TO INVENT IT
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• MAN O MAN A SHOVE ITS
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• A CLOSE SHOT AT QIAN QING GONG
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• CRUDE BEHAVIOR
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• A CLOSE SHOT AT SLACK
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• KIDS 'N' SEX
  by Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh
• NEW HIERARCHY ^TM TALE
  by St. Guy C. Deuel
• WORLD WITHOUT SLACK Excerpts:
  1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 11, 14, 15, 16.
  by St. Paul Mavrides
• I LIVED IN A TEENAGE WORLD WITHOUT SLACK
  by Puzzling Evidence
• TALES OF THE GOLDEN SLACK
  by Pope David N. Meyer II
• DUPE
  by Rev. Sternodox Keckhaver
• BLEEDING HEADECLESSIANS 9:9
  by St. Janor Hypercleats
• "BOB" AND THE OXYGEN WARS Part 1
  by Connector Waves Forest
• "BOB" AND THE OXYGEN WARS Part 2
  by Connector Waves Forest
• ABOUT THE CONTRIBUTORS
  by Rev. Ivan Stang
• THREE-FISTED REVIEW
  by Douglass St.Clair Smith

Four-Fisted Tales of "Bob" from THE STARK FIST OF REMOVAL

• ESCAPE FROM SLACKWORLD
  by Rev. Ken DeVries
• MISTER FIXIT
  by Rev. Ken DeVries
• I'M COMING, TOO, "BOB"
  by Dr. G. Gordon Gordon
• MR. ZED'S ADVENTURE
  by Dr. Chris Gross
• TEST 999
  by LIES
• PARABLE
  by LIES
• LIFE RAFT
  by Dr. Maka Dudi
• DOT, TOO DOT
  by Dr. Maka Dudi
• NEON NIGHT
  by Dr. Chris Gross
• THE PARAMUS MANUSCRIPT
  by Dr. Chris Gross
• STUPID "BOB" TRICK
  by Kibo
• HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER VACATION
  by John Trubey
• THE VISION OF AHMED FISHMONGER
  by Dr. Ahmed Fishmonger

NOT-4-KIDS

• THE REPENTANCE OF FEMSH
  by Rev. Ed Rom
• GLEETINGS
  by Pope Charles
• EXPOSE
  by Rev. Ed Rom
• I FUCKED CONNIE DOBBS
  by Rev. Ivan Stang