NEW! COMPLETE TEXT REPORTS ON 7X-DAY
from alt.slack and beyond, written by the SubGeniuses who lived through it
ALL KNOWN PHOTOS THUS FAR OF 7X-DAY EVENTS
by everybody, on the website of noble Rev. Two Beans.
ALSO: The entire edited new 6X-Day documentary is now available in our catalog AS A FINISHED DVD
-- and also for free download in SVCD format (plays on DVD players!) on alt.binaries.monter-movies!
(As is all of the new two-DVD set of SubGenius music video animations, DOBBSEDELIASTESES.)
7XDAY LOOMED, CAME, WENT, WITH NO WORLD DESTRUCTION,
NO NOTICEABLE RUPTURE OF SAVED SUBGENII!
(Only parts of some SubGenii have as yet been Taken.)
(IGNORE ALL THIS STUFF BELOW.)
THIS YEAR MUST NOT BEEN 1998.
You'll notice that July 5 lands on Monday this year. DON'T PINK OUT! This is YOUR ONLY RELIGIOUS HOLIDAY.
LAST-MINUTE NOTE: Ivan Stang's 6XDay documentary has been posted for free download from alt.binaries.monter-movies (6-30-04) -- 83 min., SVCD high quality mpeg.
CALL OUR TOLL-FREE NUMBER TO ORDER BY CREDIT CARD OR IF YOU HAVE SECURITY QUESTIONS:
Confirmed Superstar Bands, Doktors: Just announced: LITTLE FYODOR!! Detroit's incredible The Amino Acids!! • DR. HOWLL aka Hal Robins • MAN !!! • Dr. Philo Drummond • Dr. G. Gordon Gordon • Jesus • Rev. Ivan Stang • Magdalen • Nickie Deathchick • Princess Wei "R." Doe • Lonesome Cowboy Dave • Rev. Carter LeBlanc • Dok Frop • Sister Decadence • Dr. Dark's Bulldada Badfilm Drive-In of the Damned! • The Quijibo Cartel! • Rev. Chris Lee • Aunty Smartass • Rev. Amph • Rev. Eggplant • Dr. Tilles • Rev. abNorm Nihil • Sinphaltimus Exmortis • Pastor Pressure • Modemac • Doktor Lumpen • THE SWINGIN' LOVE CORPSES (Ray Hey and Sphinx Drummond joining Philo) • Bat Mummy • Two Beans • Rabbi Jacqueline Hyde • the Volkerdings • Joy deVeeve • and a slackload of newcomers whose real names wouldn't mean anything here YET, but no doubt will strike fear in the hearts of millions by July 6. If there is one.
art above by Asquire
It's time to KISS ALL CALENDARS GOODBYE!... by gathering together all the tribes and phyles of SubGeniusdom at THE COOLEST CAMPGROUND IN THE UNITED STATES!
NONE MAY STOP US -- and NONE MAY ESCAPE ONCE THE GATE CLOSES!!
CLENCH SHUT YOUR EYES AND STRUGGLE WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT, TREMBLING AND SHAKING, SWEAT POURING OFF YOU, TO TRY TO IMAGINE...
SAUCERS WILL SCREAM OVERHEAD! GREYS will SKULK in the BUSHES! ACTUAL LIVE YETIS will MATERIALIZE by YOUR CAMPFIRE! YOU WILL BECOME YOUR OWN HERO!! YOU WILL MEET FRIENDS FOR LIFE WHO WILL GET YOU RICH WITHOUT WORKING!! You will see and experience things that may SHOCK you... that may even PERMANENTLY TRAUMATIZE and SCAR you. That's OKAY. It's all part of Dobbs' UNDERPLAN. For, as prophesied by Dobbs, at 7:00 am EST, July 5, whichever year is the real 1998, might be THIS one -- you will be Ruptured up aboard your own personal Escape Vessel and serviced by Sex Goddesses/Gods while you wreak revenge on all the Pinks and Con-dupes towards whom you ever felt even the slightest dislike.
WE WILL GREET THE XISTS TOGETHER IN POWER AND GLORY!!!!
WHAT IS X-DAY? Read the SubGenius Pamphlet #1
WHERE??!? BRUSHWOOD FOLKLORE CENTER, SHERMAN, NEW YORK, USA, THIS ISLAND EARTH! BUT NOT FOR LONG!! SEE THE DIRECTIONS -- HOW TO GET TO BRUSHWOOD!
HOW MUCH??? Only $30. But it's MEMBERS ONLY. Membership is $30. If you weren't a Member already, it'll cost you $60 altogether. A CHEAP PRICE for SALVATION, if you think about it. Also a cheap price for ANY weekend-long, totally spectacular and weird campout -freakout-musical/religious event.
This year you can become as involved as you want, way ahead of time, via the
Try this 2-minute X-DAY COMMERCIAL in RealMedia format (or this 1.2 mb download -- then must be unZipped, then play in RealPlayer)
BRUSHWOOD SURVIVAL TIPS
Onan's X-DO'S AND X-DON'T'S ON X-DAY
THINGS YOU MUST BRING TO GROUND ZERO, BRUSHWOOD
TUBS AND TUBS OF PURPLE KOOL-AID!
SPONTANEOUS DOKTORBAND COMBUSTION!
TRAINED PRAIRIE SQUID GIGGIN'-PARTIES!
(Free Debeaking Tools to 1st 5 giggees)
SPORTS FIGURE BODY PART LAUNCHING!
NUDE CHAINSAW JUGGLING!
'FROP ENHANCEMENT WORKSHOPS!
LIVE FREAKS OF NATURE and ACID CASUALTIES!
FACE FUCKING BAT SPERM ANTIDOTE PUDDING COOK-OFF!
PRIVATE ADULT SEXHURT SEMINARS!
BONOBO CHIMPANZEE GOBBLIN' CONTESTS!
ODDLY NORMAL-SEEMING PEOPLE!
SEX GODDESSES, ELDER GODS, and XISTS!!!
IMAGINE -- the SHEER POWER TO BE BULLIED BY FAMOUS SUBGENIUS ZEN MASTERS FOR THE LAST TIME!!
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to BUY EVERY SUBGENIUS TRINKET, ARTIFACT and GEEGAW EVER MADE by ANY SUBGENIUS at the "Final Fire Sale Black Fleece Market of Slack".
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to meet those amazing, intriguing individuals you've heard on the radio, seen onstage, or read in alt.slack and the holy Church books -- AND, POST-RUPTURE, ATTACK THEIR ESCAPE VESSEL BATTLE PLANETS WITH YOURS!
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to WIN BACK YOUR SOUL!!!
You'll be able to tell your great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandkids, "I was at the X-Day Final Gathering in legendary Brushwood... Yep! 'Fropped up with the great Dr. Legume hisself there... even fucked Connie Dobbs! And "Bob" fucked me -- right good, I'd say!"
SEE the HUGE PHOTO REPORT, MASSIVE NEWSGROUP FEEDBACK FROM VIOLENT, DEPRAVED 4X-DAY CULT EVENT IN NEW YORK!!
1999'S XX-DAY (TONS OF PICS!! NOT FOR KIDS!!)
1998 -- THE GREATEST OF THEM ALL
(Until the REAL 1998 arrives!)
Rev. Codini's 4XD: 7 Rings of HELL
MAP OF BRUSHWOOD, SHERMAN, NY
by Irrev. Friday Jones
X-Day Brushwood Aerial Photo and Targeting Info
UFOs PHOTOGRAPHED OVER BRUSHWOOD!! See the incredible pictures by Saint N, taken from his Cessna!
ADULTS ONLY: earn the Church $ per click by checking out these two SPECIALTY PORN SITES:
XXXSPACEGIRLS.COM and WWW.HORRORSEX.COM