EVENT SCHEDULE
First, see this
from JESUS
Also:
THE HURT YOURSELF REAL BAD CONTEST!
The person who hurts himself the worst wins a GROOVY PRIZE.
DR.BRONNER'S PURE CASTILLE SOAP WRESTLING!
See your favorite Yeti babes lock slippery titties in BRUTAL COMBAT!
(Women also welcome!)
The BOBBIE TOSS!
See our Security Goons toss out the first Bobbie stupid enough to shit in the Hot Tub!
THE BULLDADA AUCTION!
Raise money for the Church by auctioning off your weird old crap, and seize the opportunity to replace it with even more!
THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS FIREWORKS DISPLAY!
Risk your VERY LIFE as untrained SubGenius dumbasses BLOW SHIT UP right in front of YOU!
THE EINSTEIN'S SECRET ORCHESTRA ROCKET ATTACK!
Bring YOUR model rockets and help ESO launch a rocket attack against unseen enemies!
Latest Rocket tests: Cape Brushwood Roars Again
(SEE THESE SNEAK PREVIEW PICS OF EINSTEIN'S SECRET ORCHESTRA PSYCHEDELIC ROCKETSHIPS
THE TRIAL OF PAPA JOE MAMA!
Marvel at the suffering of Papa Joe as he is brought before a kangaroo court and accused of heinous acts! See American Justice in action as Papa Joe is given a fair trial!
THE PUNISHMENT OF PAPA JOE MAMA!
Humiliate Papa Joe after he is pronounced guilty at his fair trial! Will it be the DUNKING CHAIR? Burning at the stake? Or will he have to run...THE GAUNTLET?
THE HUMAN HUNT!
WHO will be the HUMAN? Can YOU capture him?
PLUS!
BANDS!
STUPID DRUNKS!
RANTING!
MORE BANDS!
NAKED BOBTISM!
FREE BLOWJOBS!*
AND A SHITLOAD MORE!
*from anyone willing to give them