Contra-X Day, California

From: i.stang@subgenius.com (Rev. Ivan Stang)

In article <3563aa66.24598237@news.io.com>, gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon) wrote:
> On Sat, 09 May 1998 16:09:40 GMT, gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon) wrote:
>
> > Just wanted you poor souls who cannot make it to Ivan Stang's
> >Media Ego-go show that not ALL of the Saucers will hit that campsite
> >in rural New York, if you paid yer dues, we will find you and retrieve
> >you...if you want some REAL fun be in San Francisco on X-day where
> >the Contra-X Manifestation will take place. Remember Kennedy was
> >killed in Dallas but "Bob" was gunned down in that city by the sea.
> > Of course if you are into Stang's routine that
> >much.............

> Okay Ivan I was JOKING...you used to be a lot more fun you know...I
> think yer slack gland is atrophying...I'm gonna Smoke your frop all
> the way from Dallas to New York...man everbody takes things
> soooooooooo seriously nowadays but especiallly Stang.......sheeeeesh!

Hey man... what is more serious than X-Day, "Bob's" promised payoff to all
the SubGenii? If X-Day is a crock, then... but I don't even want to follow
that train of thought. Dobbs sold it, I smoked it, that settles it. There's
only one 7-5-98. And there's NOTHING after that, for most of these FUCKS,
such as the SIMPLENET EXECS!!

You will THANK me, you will kowtow on BENDED KNEE in appreciation of how I
blackmailed you into NOT FUCKING UP. I KNOW it... I feel it down in my
glands, in my very wallet itself!

Besides, WE WON'T HAVE TO HAUL ANY KIDS! Jesus is toting His Christ-Child
in a separate rented van, my 3 sons and daffters will drive yet ANOTHER car
-- it'll just be you me and someone else in the FROPMOBILE! It'll be SLACK
INCARNATE. As long as we don't get stopped by the cops on I-40 outside
Memphis.

Once in Brushwood we might have to drive back to Cleveland to pick up
Sterno and this so-called "Debbi" at the airport... they seem to be
planning to bring a whole pallet load of FF Bats, live ones, but we're
gonna have to figure out a way to transport 'em from Cleveland to
Brushwood.

But I guess Modemac started a RIDES BOARD?? That oughta be helpful.

This is IT, man. This is the be-all and end-all, the culmination, the big
squirt, the giant ooze! Sure there'll be Bobbies there... SUCKING OUR DICKS
and/or "YA-YAs" if that's what we want! Anybody who ISN'T there, will be
FUCKING UP!

AND WE'LL TELL THEM SO IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS, SPELLING IT OUT IN FLAMING
LETTERS IN THE SKY ON JULY 6!

Only there won't BE a July 6.

--
Copyright 1998 by Rev. Ivan Stang / 1st Orthodox Stangian
MegaFisTemple Lodge of People's Covenant Church of the
Wrath of Dobbs Yeti, Resurrected / The SubGenius Foundation,Inc.
PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214 / Fax 214-320-1561 / PRABOB
http://www.subgenius.com -- SubSITE of Slack

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: i.stang@subgenius.com (Rev. Ivan Stang)

In article <6k264l$olq@enews2.newsguy.com>,
mitchell@Doesn't.Spam.Suck.interserv.com (Popess Lilith von Fraumench)
wrote:

>
> Look who's talking, Old Man.
>
>

I feel that we should respect the elderly.

At 44, I'm elderly as HELL compared to most of you wet-behind-the-ears
ragamuffins and pickaninnies. alt.binaries.erotica.senior-citizens RULZ!
But seriously. I don't know what's WRONG in this society but I've been in
SEVERAL situations, with G. Gordon Gordon, who's 10 years older than even
ME, and half bionic, wherein some smart ass 20-something was teasing and
mocking and pestering us about our advanced decrepitude, etc., but BY GOBBS
if 5 hours later, those selfsame PUSSY-ASS KIDS weren't whining their ways
home, tails tucked between their legs, too puckered to keep partying, while
GGG and I were not only still UP, courting the FINEST BABES, and even
DANCING, yes DANCING, injecting heroin-cocaine-PCP-MACE "speedballs" into
our eye sockets, WHILE having multiple alio-sexual encounters, AND ranting
REVELATION X into pocket tape decks, and INVENTING THE INTERNET and
REWRITING ALL SCIENCE FICTION, all at the same time! And NENSLO was there
too, he wouldn't lie to you.

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From: mitchell@Doesn't.Spam.Suck.interserv.com (Popess Lilith von Fraumench)

Stang, you don't know what I'm even referring to here--near as we could tell
you were ASLEEP while Gordon and I were trading barbs. And it was all good,
clean fun, I tell you. It's been a while since I've had fun with another
SubGenius, clubbing each other with still-breathing Bobbies with paper cuts all
over their bodies, and G^3 is a real sport about it. When my Bobbie skull
busted open and I accidentally got brains in his drink, he cordially accepted
my apology, finished his drink, and continued as if nothing happened.

If I call Gordon "old", I mean it as a sign of venerable respect. Hope you
understand that some day, maybe when you get to his age--or mine.

P.Lil

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Let's face it Stang, at our age, if we haven't been killed by our
lifestyles it's highly unlikely that we CAN be. If I recall correctly,
at the '96 Devival, The Love Corpses, you, me and the Flooze smoked
our weight in high grade Tibetan frappy, drank 8% proof homebrew all
day long and still were able to recite "Trees" backwards in Hindu
while riding a flaming lust-enraged stoat to death. Philo was
officially dead at the time and still managed to reduce a live Prarie
Squid to nothing more than a mewling puddle of ectoplasm.
***
Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually
Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.
Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Peter Hipwell <petehip@cogsci.ed.ac.uk>

As a representative of the smart-ass 20-something group reading this, I
would like to mention that I myself would not be caught DEAD in the
midst of such an unseemly display of 23rd-childhood incipient Alzheimer
style juvenalia. I intend to continue with my strict hardcore regime of
quiet nights in, slippers, cocoa, a nice rocking chair, and Jim Reeves
albums. The way "Bob" intended it. Your pathetically outmoded dinosaur
"party till you poop" philosophy is simply a turd in the toilet of
self-delusion, the LAST, CLEAREST and most ONCO-CONCEPTUAL indication
that you are out-of-touch with everything but out-of-touchness itself,
sinking slowly into the quagmire of the ever-increasingly-wrinkled face
of ETERNITY.

--
Sa-ti muste vampirii curul!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: i.stang@subgenius.com (Rev. Ivan Stang)

You may be right.

But... JIM REEVES!!!

I thought I was the ONLY ONE.

MY BROTHER!!!!

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From: gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon)

On Fri, 22 May 1998 15:20:45 +0100, Peter Hipwell
<petehip@cogsci.ed.ac.uk> wrote:

>
>As a representative of the smart-ass 20-something group reading this, I
>would like to mention that I myself would not be caught DEAD in the
>midst of such an unseemly display of 23rd-childhood incipient Alzheimer
>style juvenalia. I intend to continue with my strict hardcore regime of
>quiet nights in, slippers, cocoa, a nice rocking chair, and Jim Reeves
>albums. The way "Bob" intended it.

NO SLACK PLEASE, WE'RE ENGLISH!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon)

On Thu, 21 May 1998 17:57:03 -0600, i.stang@subgenius.com (Rev. Ivan
Stang) wrote:
>
>Only there won't BE a July 6.
>
Just aminute there Stang, I got a hot date with my ex-boss on the
sixth!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Philo Drummond <philo@subgenius.com>

Rev. Ivan Stang wrote:

> REVELATION X into pocket tape decks, and INVENTING THE INTERNET and
> REWRITING ALL SCIENCE FICTION, all at the same time! And NENSLO was there
> too, he wouldn't lie to you.
>

Yah, me too!
(First, you gotta recall the appropriate voice inflection)

But really, don't be the last one to check out the new realaudio files on the
Corpses Web Site!!

We started at the beginning. More new ones arriving daily!

The One True Philo

--
Attention Shoppers,
check out the bargains at
http://www.corpses.com/sounds.htm

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon)

On Mon, 25 May 1998 19:49:41 -0400, friday@subgenius.com (IrRev.
Friday Jones) wrote:

>In article <3569cb9a.27789129@news.io.com>, gggor@io.com (G. G. Gordon) wrote:
>
>>On Mon, 25 May 1998 15:57:11 +0100, Peter Hipwell
>><petehip@cogsci.ed.ac.uk> wrote:
>>
>>>G. G. Gordon wrote:
>>>
>>>> NO SLACK LEASE, WE'RE ENGLISH!
>>>
>>>MORE PEE, VICAR?
>>>
>>>--
>>>Sa-ti muste vampirii curul!
>>
>>And then the Chief said, "but tell me Two-Dogs-Fucking, why are you so
>>interested?"
>
>"But if that's your Johnson Rod, then ... WHAT'S IN THE REFRIGERATOR?"
>

And the colonel said, "oh, I thought it was your colla, so I fucked
it!"

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