In article <3vpe1k$g8j@ixnews2.ix.netcom.com>, sphinx1@ix.netcom.com (Sphinx Drummond ) says:
>I think Major Nelson was a real chauvinistic jerk. I think it was wrong
>of him to make Genie call him Master and to make her stay all cramped
>up in that bottle. He was stupid too. If I had someone like Genie I'd
>let her lounge around all the time and she could wear a french maid's
>outfit and stuff. Face it Major Nelson was a stupid jerk! If I were his
>commanding officer I would have court martialed his ass.
Aw c'mon Sphinx, you know daned good and well if
you had been in the major's place you'd have done more
than have her call you master and live in a bottle.
ggg
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From: lurch@mindspring.com (Mr. Lurch)
He was obviously a fruit. He had a girl that
looked like that running around dressed like that, who could conjure up all
kinds of magical variations on a game of hide-the-salami, and he never stuffed anything in her bottle.
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From: mbeaudoin@fdant.nctr.fda.gov (future Monsignor)
If you people remember, she never showed her belly button. I believe this is because she didn't have one. Who knows how many other holes were missing from her body. This may have influenced Major Nelson drastically.
*
I've been waiting a long time for
someone like you to record this moment - Shanti
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From: bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)
We all could see that she still had a mouth...
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From: eraserhead@iglou.iglou.com (David Lynch)
future Monsignor (mbeaudoin@fdant.nctr.fda.gov) wrote:
:This may have influenced Major Nelson drastically.
Come on, she was a GENIE, for crying out loud! She could have magically
grown a pussy on Major Nelson's back, if she wanted to! Your explanation
just doesn't wash.
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From: mbeaudoin@fdant.nctr.fda.gov (future Monsignor)
eraserhead@iglou.iglou.com (David Lynch) writes:
>Come on, she was a GENIE, for crying out loud! She could have magically
>grown a pussy on Major Nelson's back, if she wanted to! Your explanation
>just doesn't wash.
I thought about this one all week and I'm still not convinced she had one. In
fact she was the only genie I knew that had a bottom half. All the other
genies just had a wisp of colored smoke for an ass. I'm not a genie expert but I know they became genies by a HAJIE(sp?) and were imprisoned slaves.
Maybe they had to follow some code like those priestesses that can't fall in love or they'll lose all their powers. And after being imprisoned in a bottle or lamp for 1,000's of years it may be a good thing not to have one. You wouldn't go crazy that way.
I'm so confused. If there are any genie's out there which can clear this up for
me I would greatly appreciate it.
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From: Philo Drummond <pdrummon@mail.icon-stl.net>
<sphinx1@ix.netcom.com> writes
> up in that bottle. He was stupid too. If I had someone like Genie I'd
> let her lounge around all the time and she could wear a french maid's
> outfit and stuff.
Yeah, like the kind with crotchless panties and no bra. Heh, Heh, Heh. You
know, Jeannie's (note correct spelling) family name was Hussein. Do you
think......?
Philo
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From: sphinx1@ix.netcom.com (Sphinx Drummond )
Philo Drummond <pdrummon@mail.icon-stl.net> writes:
>You know, Jeannie's (note correct spelling) family name was Hussein.
>Do you think......?
Dear brother, didn't we argue about this 30 years ago? Ms. Eden's
character Jeannie, was the based on the REAL life adventures of Genie.
The real Genie after breaking away from the REAL Major Nelson and his
unreasonable demands sold her story, which was turned into the TV show.
Once again you are confusing television with reality. If you go back
and read the original post you will see no mention of the TV show, no
mention of television at all. G'yall, Shhiifuu..
Hey, you've changed addresses so many times how do I even know you're
the REAL Philo. Do you think......?
-Sphinx
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From: clavis@ix.netcom.com (the Grand Clavister )
sphinx1@ix.netcom.com (Sphinx Drummond ) writes:
>Face it Major Nelson was a stupid jerk! If I were his
>commanding officer I would have court martialed his ass.
This is, of course, above and beyond the fact that he apparently had access to
an omnipotent being... one who, at his command, could have cured all disease, famine, wars (admitted putting "Major" Nelson out of a job), et al, and brought paradise and ecstacy to a world gone mad. But he didn't command her to do anything except occassionally clean the house (which we never saw the top floor of... :?) What a shithead.
the Grand Clavister
(I saw an "I Dream of Jeanie" bottle on display at the Sony Plaza in NY...
assholes!)
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From: Philo Drummond <pdrummon@mail.icon-stl.net>
<clavis@ix.netcom.com> writes:
> But he didn't command her to do anything except occassionally clean the >house (which we never saw the top floor
Hey I saw that upstairs room onetime. They had a big ol' ballroom and a second kitchen, a couple of spare bedrooms, a play room, a rumpus room, a
rathskeller, a library, a restaurant, an electrolysis clinic, and a bathroom
with a suana. Not bad even for an astronaut, but you know now that I think
about it maybe Jeannie just made all that shit up there.
Philo
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From: gggor@io.com (gggor)
gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman) says:
>eraserhead@iglou.iglou.com says...
>>
>>Joe Newman (gunther@bga.com) wrote:
>>: You may be one of those sissy-boy new age enema fetishists, but I've
>>: got to agree with you on this one. That stupid fuck he used to hang
>>: out with (the one who ended up on Bob Newhart) was a real anus too.
>>: If I had been one of those guys, I'd have been smoking opium and
>>: tit-fucking Barbara Eden in every goddamn episode. That show fucking
>>: sucked. Green Acres ruled. I'll bet Nixon watched Green Acres the
>>: night he bombed Cambodia.
>>
>>Personally, I never liked Green Acres,
>
>Yeah, but then you wouldn't know a good imported soap if
>it bit you on the ass, either.
>
>-Pappy Fuck
>
You have to be careful about that ass-biting soap, I bent
over in a shower in Madrid and had my piles excised.
gg
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From: gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman)
eraserhead@iglou.iglou.com says...
>
>Joe Newman (gunther@bga.com) wrote:
>
>: Yeah, but then you wouldn't know a good imported soap if
>: it bit you on the ass, either.
>
>Oh ho, Mr. world fucking traveller, you should talk. If you have any
>information on the heathen Oriental soaps on the other side of the world,
>which I doubt, you've never shared it with any of us here.
There's a bar of Bee & Flower Jasmine soap in my shower soap dish
right now, muthafucka. And it's superior to any of those fuckhead
American soaps you've been wasting bandwidth on.
>I'm currently negotiating an arrangement where I'd get some Cusson's >Imperial Leather soap (Hey guy, you out there? I don't think my e-mail is >getting through), but until then, I'll have to stick with what I can get my >hands on.
You must live in a goddamn outhouse, but at least it sounds like you're
moving up in the world.
> Not only that, these ARE foriegn soap reviews for those guys out in
>New Zealand and Norway. Your bullshit flag-waving Americo-centrism isn't
>welcome here.
The only flag you'll ever see me waving will be on fire.
>Clean up your act, before somebody beats you with a
>baseball bat.
Pump cum, stinkboy.
-Pappy Fuck
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From: gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman)
In article <3vv3h4$6g9@anarchy.io.com>, gggor@io.com says...
>
> You have to be careful about that ass-biting soap, I bent
>over in a shower in Madrid and had my piles excised.
I once had a bar of glycerine soap bite off my *entire* ass.
I must have lost a quart of blood. Fortunately, Jayne Mansfield
had just died, and her ass was rushed in by lifecopter, and
they were able to attach it to my tail.
The doctors who performed my butt operation told me that
Mansfield's autopsy was pretty hilarious... a decapitated
corpse with no ass! HAHAHAHA! It still cracks me up.
-Pappy Fuck
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From: bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)
gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman) wrote:
>The doctors who performed my butt operation told me that
>Mansfield's autopsy was pretty hilarious... a decapitated
>corpse with no ass! HAHAHAHA! It still cracks me up.
I used to feel sorry for you because you had to hang out with Nixon
and listen to all his bullshit stories about bending Rosemary over the
desk and teaching her the true meaning of "hail to the chief" when we
know damned good and well he didn't REALLY like women. But now, I feel
sorry for you because you have the ass of a sixty-eight year old
woman. No wonder it's not hairy....
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From: gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman)
bmyers@ionet.net says...
>But now, I feel sorry for you because you have the ass of a sixty-eight year >old woman. No wonder it's not hairy....
Save your sympathy. This ass still gets loads of compliments,
especially when I sashay past a construction site.
-Pappy Fuck
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From: bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)
pkitty@netcom.com (Pee Kitty) wrote:
>TarlaStar (bmyers@ionet.net) wrote:
>: So...when do we get to see a photo of your ass in a string bikini?
>As soon as we get to see a photo of your ass in chain mail!
>(Got the photographer tailing Newman as we speak...)
Hold yer water, Boy. My ass doesn't get exposed until Oct. 28th.
But Newman's had Mansfield's ass for years. I'd just like to see what
he's done with it, is all. I wonder who has Nixon's ass? It must have
been difficult to determine exactly WHEN to stop cutting.
Original file name: Major Nelson was a stupÉ
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