Hour of Slack #1543 - Philo and Hal, Gorillas and Demons at X-Day

It's like the hideous mutated offspring of The Hour of Slack force-mated with The Puzzling Evidence Show! Dr. Philo Drummond, Overman First Degree, and the famous Dr. Hal of Ask Dr. Hal were both at Wisteria for 18X-Day Drill, and this was the very last of the live radio shows recorded at Caffeina's Café in 2015. You can see an extremely detailed log of the subjects covered -- plus the timestamps of all the cusswords! -- at the Hour of Slack page on subgenius.com (click on any show title). [In fact, you're seeing it now!!] Suffice it to say that everything both cool and uncool, holy and unholy, is covered. And uncovered.

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LOG of THIS EPISODE:

Testiclees - show intro - Bobtism report - tomorrow we all get up at 7 - even Ol' Sequaw will be Rupstured. Dreams of X-Day -- all my lost comic books will be mine again- are saucers really planet-sized? Beaming up the whole Grand Canyon - Bottled City of Kandor is really a replica! - Bulldada Auction, Taco Party, Pot Party, Costume Ball - Stang's dozen disguises. The Paper Dobbs Masks at Dealy Plaza on Nov. 22 1981. Bob mask, Mitt Romney mask. Rev. Nickie teaching conspiracy theory studies. Lee Cipher's doctorate doktor trick on academic pink-eyed Pinks. Avoiding the naked fat guy-a-thon. The Fairy Woods, trying to catch fairies for Pixie-on-a-Stick. Barbecued fairies. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and his fairies. Maybe when fairies manifest they LOOK like 2-D photos on sticks. Orb angels disguise themselves as photo dust effects. Roswell "rods" and other supernatural artifacts. Each grain of film really a tiny Dobbshead. Stickers to pass out to folks after they pass out. Bobsongs 7 & 8. Look at the audience going nuts! The "birds" are really droid drone-bots. Drones in the KPFA station. The X-Day gunfight over the Grand Canyon. A lot of things are and were SUPPOSED to happen. Keeping faith for 18 years now. Rev. Christopher Lee has returned from the grave! Show hosts are delivered Show coffee in metal mugs. Susie's hat, a 49 Bladed Windbreaker. More now! Everything Now! BG music is Monster Hunter themes in Dixieland jazz style. Philo just noticed he's wearing no headphones! The lack of a "house mic" -- so we can't HEAR you! Great men run in circles. Serious climate change tomorrow on July 5, between 6:59 and 7:01. Reading samples of "The Gorillas and Demons In Your Life" - the bad demon in Grandpa's pants. Philo never changes into the OverMan when it makes sense. Philo's bad gorilla accent. Philo's shitty demon accent. 28:24: BALLS, PUSSY. Bastards and Basterdas. More Gorilla, Demon - 28:54 - GOD DAMN PENIS BITER - masturbating to Ernest Borgnine - we must administer acubeating, glandscaping - new Gorilla got tattoed. 30:51 - Porn Star's BUTTHOLE also 31: BUTTHOLE tattoo idea. 31:10 BUUTHOLE 31:24 Yesterday's gorilla and demon forms? The audience is playing Magic. Philo retired from running the whole Conspiracy. Wei was the only literate person in Weather Control. The Athens Ohio newspaper headline about the accursed X-Day derecho disaster of 2012 - freak storms of the first 2 Wisteria X-Day! Yet only Wisteria had power, ice, Internet! "Just one bag of ice, Bob!" - 37:35 FUCKED. Wotan hurled thunderbolts. Philo's manipulations. Bad mic sound effects. Last bag of tortilla chips in the world. Taco party coming. Stang can't make octopus taco filling. An Ask Dr. Hal Minute injected into show - speed round. "What does a booger smell like when it's already in your nose?" Hal on booger consistency. Some people have NO questions, think they already know it or else it's just not cool. "If it was cool I'd already know about it." "Is my eyeball on straight?" "Which one?" "The one in the middle." The question Hal couldn't answer. "Give Hal the answer, he guesses question?" One Hal answer. One Philo answer. "If Hal could ask Hal, what would Hal ask Hal?" Philo ponders this at length. Hal gets the dollar? Each gets half of Gordian dollar bill. "Why is Philo the way he is?" "You are you because you can be no one else." Time to wrap up show, which will take at least 5 minutes. Don't panic! Stop panicking! So many crminals with the name Doug Smith. Why is there no King Smith? Agent Smith in the Matrix. The Matrix series went astray. A SubGenius found someone who would marry it! They they ever emerge from the pond after we Bobtised 'em? Old Sequaw's sharp beak. Like kids chattering in a sandbox - glad I'm deaf. Jeb Bush's name. Can't you feel the Jebmentum and Jeb-citement? Jebticipation! Good Philo end. Can remove very end for PG show.

Dr. Hal Robins: http://askdrhal.com and http://radiovalencia.fm

Rev. Susie the Floozie and "Bob's" Slack Time Funhouse, WREK Atlanta:
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