[NOTE from Modemac: Commentary from members of the Fairer Sex, or at
least from the UberBabes who secretly rule alt.slack, is encouraged.]
[ Article crossposted from alt.sex.brothels,alt.sex,alt.sex.services,soc.men ]
[ Author was bashful ]
[ Posted on 25 Apr 1995 01:05:35 GMT ]
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The Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) List on Legal Prostitution in Nevada.
Version 1.00, created on Sunday, November 20, 1994.
Version 1.10, modified on Monday, December 05, 1994 (Thanks, "brother"!).
Version 1.20, modified on Wednesday, December 21, 1994 (New Mustang
Ranch telephone number, e-mail update on "Honey").
Version 1.30, Modified on Saturday, January 07, 1995 (Donating blood,
telephone conversation with "Honey").
Version 1.40, Modified on Sunday, January 22, 1995 ("Hidden agenda").
Version 1.50, Modified on Sunday, February 12, 1995 (Split up into three
parts).
Version 1.51, Modified on Tuesday, March 21, 1995 (Did it with "Honey"!)
1.0 Table of Contents :
1.0 Table of Contents.
2.0 Introduction.
3.0 Legal Status of Prostitution in Nevada.
4.0 Where to find Nevada's legal brothels.
5.0 What to expect when choosing a lady.
6.0 Negotiating the contract.
7.0 The do's and don't's of sex.
8.0 A Sermon.
9.0 "Tail" Tales.
10.0 A Recommendation.
This is part 1, sections 1.0 through 5.0.
Part 2 is sections 6.0 through 8.0.
Part 3 is sections 9.0 through 10.0.
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2.0 Introduction.
2.1 "Say what?!? Prostitution is legal somewhere in the United States?
Yeah, sure!"
It is true, prostitution is legal in certain counties in the state of
Nevada. More on this later.
2.2 "Just who are you (the author of this FAQ), and what makes you think
that you are an authority on legal prostitution in Nevada?"
I am a normal American male who has been foolish enough to spend most of
his spare income purchasing the favors of ladies. My first visit was in
May 1986, and I have paid many visits over the years to almost all of the
legal houses in Nevada.
2.4 "What restrictions are there on my use of this FAQ?"
None. Distribute it as you wish. You can even sell it for profit, if you
like! But please don't misrepresent me.
2.5 "I don't trust you. You must have a hidden agenda of some sort."
The real purpose of this document is to inform those of you who have never
been to a real brothel before as to what to expect. Old veterans out there
in cyberspace need to make sure I've got my facts straight.
However, there is a little something that I wish for, which is best
described in the following recent anonymous posting to "alt.sex.services",
"As Nevada has legalized prostitution, the following question comes to mind:
Say someone wants a particular kind of girl--say a petite (4'11") blonde,
with long blonde hair down past her ass. How would one find such a girl?
Posting here? Is there a "central source" to contact for "just the right
girl?"
By the way--anyone know of any girls in NV that fit those specs?? <:-)"
Sorry, but no such "central source" exists, at least not a good updated
source. This is something that we will have to work on.
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3.0 Legal Status of Prostitution in Nevada.
3.1 "You mean that a woman can just, uh, set up shop in Nevada?"
In the United States, "it" is legal in only one of the fifty states,
Nevada. And then not everywhere in Nevada; Las Vegas, Reno, Carson City
and Lake Tahoe still have it illegal. Supposedly the city fathers (and
mothers) don't think that prostitution contributes to the family-oriented
image that these gambling centers want. So any "action" that you may get in
these cities will be high-risk in more ways than one.
It is only in certain counties in Nevada where prostitution is legal. State
law forbids legal prostituion in counties which have a population over a
certain number (hence the big cities are out); the remaining counties may
have legal brothels, at local option. Not all do.
Street-solicitation is illegal; only in licensed establishments can you
legally meet a Lady of the Night.
3.2 "What about AIDS?"
Condoms weren't required when I made my first visit to a Nevada brothel, but
by the time I made my second visit a year later they were required by law.
Note that condoms are required for oral sex as well.
The women that work in Nevada's brothels get regular medical checkups. All
these precautions are not just for the lady's protection, but for your's and
mine too.
Remember the old line that when you sleep with someone, you are also
sleeping with everyone that that person has ever slept with? Each of these
ladies has had sex with hundreds, if not thousands, of men. Think about it.
3.3 "Why haven't I heard of these legal brothels before?"
By law, Nevada brothels can't advertise, so it is no wonder that you've
never heard of them before.
However, one does hear about them from time to time. Years ago, Geraldo
Rivera did a special on sex and he visited the Mustang Bridge Ranch and
interviewed two of the ladies. Also, 60 minutes briefly mentioned one of
the Winnemucca houses (60 minutes also once devoted an entire segment to the
Amsterdam brothels). The Mustang also made the news when it went onto the
stock exchange, and later when it was temporarily closed due to tax evasion
charges. And I've met ladies who say that they learned of the existence of
these Nevada brothels from articles in Glamour and Cosmopolitan magazines
(WOW! Start them out young...). So the word does get out.
And you can find them listed in the Yellow Pages.
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4.0 Where to find Nevada's legal brothels.
4.1 "Get to the point, man! Where do I go to get laid?"
There are several legal brothels throughout Nevada. I will describe where
to find the three largest and best, and their neighborhood competitors.
The three are, in alphabetical order :
THE CHICKEN RANCH :
The Chicken Ranch gets its name from the movie and Broadway play "The Best
Little Whorehouse In Texas". You will find it in Pahrump, Nevada, which is
about 50 miles from Las Vegas by way of Highway 160.
The Chicken Ranch sits at the end of Homestead Road. The turn-off from
Highway 160 onto Homestead Road is just a short hop south-east from the
Terrible Herbst convenience store. It is then a good eight miles along the
dirt Homestead Road before you finally arrive at The Chicken Ranch.
You will also find their competitor, Sheri's, just a bit further down the
road.
THE MUSTANG RANCH :
The Mustang Ranch is about eight miles east of Reno on Interstate 80. Take
the Mustang exit (exit #23) and follow the signs. You will cross over a one-
lane bridge and there it is, the largest brothel in the United States. To
its left is the smaller Mustang II, and along a short road to the right you
will find their competitor, the Old Bridge Ranch.
THE NEW SAGEBRUSH RANCH :
The New Sagebrush Ranch is about seven miles east of Carson City on Highway
50. Watch for Sam's Saloon on your right, and then turn right onto Kit Kat
Road. The New Sagebrush Ranch and her sister ranch The Sagebrush Guest
Ranch is just ahead and on the right. You will also find The Kit Kat Ranch
and Kitty's Ranch in the same area. Before you reach the Kit Kat Road
turnoff from Highway 50, you should see a sign for the left-hand turn to the
Moonlight Ranch.
Perhaps in future editions of this FAQ I'll discuss other Nevada brothels.
The other, smaller brothels have a relaxed atmosphere all their own.
4.2 "Do they have telephone numbers?"
Yes.
Chicken Ranch : (702) 382-7870
Mustang Ranch : (702) 342-0176
New Sagebrush : (702) 246-5683
4.3 "Fine. But how do I find out where the other brothels are?"
I recommend the official guide, "Best Cat Houses in Nevada". It is written
by J.R. Schwartz, and is available ($5.95) from :
Straight Arrow Publishing Company
Box 1068
Coronado, CA 92118
ISBN 0-9613653-0-7
I am told that it can also be found in Vegas and Reno adult bookstores.
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5.0 What to expect when choosing a lady.
5.1 "What should I expect when I first get there?"
For Nevada's larger brothels, you have to walk up to a gate and push a
buzzer button, and then someone on the inside pushes a button in there to
open the gate for you. To keep people from accidentally walking in, I
suppose ("Gee whiz, you mean that this really isn't an auto-parts store?").
Once you're inside, then what happens depends on which "ranch" you're at.
The Mustang and The New Sagebrush are rather informal. The ladies are lined
up when you enter and they introduce themselves giving their "stage" names,
and then the hostess (madam?) asks, "Would you care to choose a lady?". If
you see what you like you nervously point your finger at your choice and
mumble "third from the left" or "the one in the red dress" or whatever since
you can't remember her name, because there may be as many as twenty ladies
in the line-up. Otherwise, you mumble that you'd like to take your time and
then wander over to the bar and order an expensive beer, and then the ladies
will one-by-one wander over to you and make small-talk and ask why you
prefer over-priced beer to pussy. Eventually you either see a lady that
rings your bell, or you leave and take a look at one of the other nearby
ranches. This is if you're at The Mustang or The New Sagebrush Ranches.
If you go to The Chicken Ranch outside Las Vegas, you push the buzzer, the
hostess greets you and you enter an empty room. She asks if you wish to see
a lady and if you say yes, then a few minutes later the ladies march single-
file into the room and you choose one. If you don't want one of them, then
the ladies leave the room and you go to the bar next door and order an
expensive beer, and maybe one or two of the ladies will come over and talk
to you, but usually not. The Chicken Ranch tends to be less friendly than
the other ranches.
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6.0 Negotiating the contract.
6.1 "How about the business end?"
So let's say that you did like one of the young fillies. Then the two of
you go to her room and dicker ("dick her"?). That is, you discuss in
private what it is you want to do. You cannot negotiate business out at the
bar or at their main line-up. While you're going to her room she will ask
you your name and where you're from, what you're doing in town, and if you
have ever been there before. Once you enter her room she asks what you'd
like to do, and you tell her ("There's this position in the Kama Sutra..."),
then she asks how much you're willing to spend, and then the contract
negotiations start. These ladies are not employees here, they are private
contractors, so there are no set prices, though sometimes they'll show you
an over-priced menu just as if they (the prices) are hard and firm. And
speaking of hard and firm, once the price and responsibilities are
established, she will then ask to see your ding-dong. You'll drop your
drawers and she'll either sit on the edge of the bed or get on her knees and
take a critical look at it, sometimes a seemingly long inspection which
isn't sensual at all and reminds me of the way a potential buyer would look
into the mouth of a horse or at the engine of a used automobile. Anyway, if
she is satisfied that things look okay (no evidence of disease), then she'll
look up at you, smile, and say "You'll live". If you don't pass inspection,
then she tosses you out the airlock without a space-suit on and you burst
from explosive decompression in the hard vacuum of interstellar space.
Otherwise, you pay her. Visa and MasterCard accepted. They take cash too,
of course. It is reported that some brothels have ATMs, and instead of
taking your credit card, they instead have you withdraw cash off of your
card.
She takes your payment, tells you to undress and relax, and leaves, and if
you pay by credit card she comes back for you to sign the receipt and leaves
again. Eventually, she returns and she gets naked too and washes your thing
and washes her thing and then the fun starts.
In some houses you don't get naked until after the hostess has been by to
collect the payment from you directly.
6.2 "What does it cost?"
Sorry, friend, but that depends on the lady. Remember, they are independent
contractors. In general, the more attractive the lady, the higher the
price. Sometimes I can get a "party" as the industry calls it for $150, but
usually it is more like $200 for the more attractive ladies (ugly ladies
will do it for well less than $100). She will give you head and your choice
of positions, as well as a good massage. But then again prices do vary.
Negotiate with her; maybe you'll be able to get her to do the nasty for less
than I'm able to.
And if you want to come twice or more for an extended stay as I sometimes
do, then again you will pay more. If you are willing to go with less like
skip intercourse, then a simple hand job will cost less.
You pay more if you're drunk.
6.3 "Anything to look out for?"
Some of the ladies think I'm odd when I say that I like a little bit of
foreplay first, where I caress her and get some tender, loving care to start
things off, rather than get down right away to the nitty-gritty. I make
sure that that is part of the contract, since on a few occasions the lady
has refused to allow anything except just the act of intercourse (not just
men get in a hurry).
Be sure that you tell her exactly what you want before you pay your money.
It used to be that the lady would let you suck her tits, but recently I've
had some refuse me that priviledge. I hate it when they only tell you the
rules AFTER you've paid your money. Get those rules straight first!
6.4 "What about after sex?"
Some ladies are in a hurry for you to leave, and others like to sit and talk
awhile. This also depends on how much you spend.
Note that just as she washes you prior to sex, she washes you after sex.
One thing that you can't do is wander alone through the brothel. You might
run into someone you know ("Boss! What are you doing here?!?"). Your lady
will always escort you.
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7.0 The do's and don't's of sex.
7.1 "You mean I have to wear a raincoat?"
Yes, condom usage is mandatory, even for oral sex, by law of the State of
Nevada. Interesting, how some ladies manage to make putting on the condom
such a sensual experience...
7.2 "Anything else taboo?"
Her other rules are always "No kissing on the mouth and no fingers up my
pussy". And anal sex is forbidden.
Though this has nothing to do with sex, the ladies don't like it if you show
up in a taxi cab. Some brothels have a deal with the local cabbies that
they get a share of the money that you pay the lady. So the ladies prefer
you show up with your own transportation so that they don't have to share.
7.3 "So then everything else is okay?"
That depends on the lady. Lots of fantasy things like domination are
available, though that again depends on the lady.
Several times I've had the lady of my choice try to entice me into going
with another lady at the same time. You can even have three or four at once
if you like, but you're gonna pay big bucks.
The Mustang and The Sagebrush allow outdates, where you can take your lady
outside of the brothel to a restaurant or theater or casino, or to your
hotel room for sex. Again, you have to pay the price.
7.4 "Isn't anonymity wonderful? No one else need ever know!"
None of the people that I work with know of my "hobby". Nor do any of my
friends or family (except for a handful of "internet" friends). I like it
that way. No awkward moments where I have to explain my actions, or defend
the legality of the world's oldest profession. This privacy goes both ways,
by protecting the identity of the lady as well. You don't know her real
name, and she doesn't know yours unless you pay by credit card. I've spoken
to several of the ladies about whether their friends or family know the
exact circumstances of their employment, and many manage to make a good
living without the folks back home ever learning the truth. Why, perhaps
your very own sister or girlfriend ...
Or maybe I've already met your sister or girlfriend!
And then there's that one lady who told me of coming out for the line-up,
and who does she see standing there but her own brother! They agreed to
never tell Mom and Pop of this chance meeting. Small wonder.
So yes, anonymity is a splendid thing. But you still have to be
responsible about it. Recently I exchanged e-mail with someone that had
read my FAQ, and it came out that he didn't dally with the ladies because
he wanted to continue and donate blood, and this reminded me of my own
experience.
It had been years since I'd given blood, so when an opportunity to give
came up about two years ago I thought "Why not?". So I go in to give but
first one has to go through an interview and then fill out a long form with
lots of personal questions, something that one didn't have to do the last
time I gave blood. So I'm going through the questions, one-by-one, "Are
you a homosexual?", "Have you taken illegal intravenous drugs?", questions
of that sort, and then I run across the question "Have you given money or
drugs to anyone for sex?", and to my amazement I found myself checking it
"No"! No, I haven't given drugs to anyone for sex, but -yes- I've given a
huge chunk of my income to Nevada ladies for sex!
And the question made me angry. There's nothing wrong with my blood! I've
always practised safe sex, since 1986, and wouldn't be doing it with
prostitutes unless I thought that it was very safe indeed! Of course, I
thought, they are talking about street prostitutes, so I can honestly say
no to this stupid question since I've been prudent and had sex only with
Nevada prostitutes who undergo regular blood tests and only have safe sex
(use condoms) with their customers. So there!
But at the end of the form the blood bank allows you to check a box that
directs them to dispose of your blood donation as waste, regardless of
whether or not they find anything wrong with it or how you answered their
questions, and so I marked it for disposal, so nobody got my blood, and
I've vowed never to donate blood again.
It is an imperfect world. I can't help but think that this world could use
a little bit more good, safe blood to help save people's lives with, safe
blood as I'm sure mine is, but at some point you have to be responsible and
tell the truth no matter how much it hurts. I lied, but made sure that the
consequences would still be the same as if I had told the truth, and I will
not allow myself to be put into the position of having to lie again.
And I recommend that you do the same as well.
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8.0 A Sermon.
8.1 "The Golden Rule says that you should treat others as you would have
them treat yourself, but does this apply to prostitutes?"
Yes, the Golden Rule applies to prostitutes.
I will be blunt and say that most of these ladies are unattractive, and most
of the time I just leave instead of choosing one. But sometimes I see a
really good-looking woman, and there are times when I have difficulty
deciding which one I want because they all look good. But they have to be
attractive. To a certain extent my being picky is a double standard because
I too am not very attractive, but its my money and I don't have to spend it
if I don't want to. It is an imperfect world. But I've always been on my
good behavior when I'm in her room, and leave a good tip because I know that
theirs is a tough job and I am deeply appreciative of this service.
It is up to you guys to make sure that your experience is a good one. Treat
her nicely. After all, God is a woman and you don't want to piss Her off by
mistreating Her sisters!
8.2 "How can something immoral like prostitution be legal?"
If you are reading this then presumably you really aren't interested in an
answer to this question. When I was young I thought that morality had
something to do with whether or not you were a good or bad person. So what
does sex have to do with morality, since both the good and the bad have sex?
Sex between consenting adults is legal when done for free, but paying money
for it makes it illegal. Why? Its okay to pay for a meal at a restaurant,
though there is nothing more intimate than the food you put inside
yourself. And we don't expect medical doctors to work for free, though they
may probe and poke you everywhere and even cut you up. So why do we as a
society fear the intimacy of sex? I say that Congress should pass a law
that its okay for lawyers to give their services for free, but it's a felony
for them to get paid for practising law.
I want to be honest and say that I am overall very satisfied with my Nevada
brothel experience, and have precious memories of the many fine ladies that
I met. That many sound trite to the jaded, but that is exactly how I feel.
However, perhaps it is time for me to get a girl-friend or better yet
finally get married. Some day my Princess will come...
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9.0 "Tail" Tales.
9.1 "What do the girls look like?"
Previously I mentioned that I find most of the ladies unattractive, and that
usually I leave the brothel without doing business. This is true in general
for most of Nevada's brothels, but at the three brothels that I am singling
out I almost always find an attractive lady. However, it is still true that
at all of the brothels you will find that most of the ladies in the lineup
are not someone one would be willing to have sex with for free, much less
pay money for the honor. Yes, this makes me a hypocrite since I myself am
fat and ugly, and it is hard to maintain one's dignity while acknowledging
one's own hypocrisy. But youth and beauty is what prostitution is primarily
about.
My recommendation is that if you don't see what you like, then gracefully
leave and check out the competition. You can always return later.
9.2 "So you've only picked out nice-looking chicks?"
I would like to say yes, but the sad fact is that sometimes I've picked out
ladies that I wished I hadn't.
The lighting isn't always all that good when the ladies are lined up, and
sometimes I pick one out, go to her room and change my mind once I've gotten
a closer look. It is hard to be nice and not hurt her feelings and be
honest; try to be nice to the lady.
Also, it is often hard to tell what a lady's figure is really like in the
lineup because of the loose gowns and lingerie that they sometimes wear.
Relatively few of the ladies are what I would call slender.
9.3 "Do you have any pet peeves?"
Have you ever heard the old saying, "You can lead a horse to water, but you
can't make it drink"? To me, sex is more than just intercourse. It is my
experience that Nevada ladies live up to the agreed-upon contract, but sex
with a woman who just lays there like a dead fish isn't what I have in mind
when I think of good sex. I like some conversation, some tender loving
care, and some hugs.
Most of the ladies that I've been with are just fine, and some are
excellent, but some are stone cold, some don't like touching you or being
touched, and some seem to enjoy being aloof and distant. My point is that
there is really nothing that you can do about such behaviour once you've
paid your money; you just have to make the best of the situation. As hard
as it may be, please be nice to her.
I should be fair and say that everyone has a bad day every so often, and the
job that Nevada's ladies perform is a very tough one. Yeah, guys, how would
you like to have sex with just any woman that came along, regardless of her
age, appearance, or behaviour? Yech! Also understand that these ladies
stay inside their brothel for extended periods of time, like two or three
weeks, during which time they have to constantly get along with the
management, other ladies (who are their competitors), and a stream of
customers who can be surly and drunk. The ladies that work in Nevada's
brothels are human beings, just like you and me, and deserve to be treated
nicely.
9.4 "Have you had any embarassments?"
I've never gotten used to that initial examination. These ladies spread
apart the tip of your cock and look all around your balls and public hair
for signs of disease just like a doctor would. I'm not complaining since
this is a very important process, but it's almost scary. And I really do
get scared when an extremely beautiful lady is examining me for the first
time, to the point that I can't get an erection! Beautiful women make me
nervous!
Another thing that is scary is to learn afterward that your lady is married!
You really don't know what her figure looks like until she undresses. She
may have a very nice, lean looking figure, but sometimes it's a little shock
when she finally takes it off and you see those folds of skin below her
tummy. She's a mommy! And then there was this one tall blond who had the
hardest, flatest stomach, but after we'd done the nasty we started talking
about this-and-that and she then showed me pictures of her three children
and hubby. Very strange.
And the sad fact is that of all the Nevada ladies I've been with, only one
had an orgasm. And that was probably faked.
9.5 "But are they good people?"
Wow! What a wide range of personalities! Not just any woman can handle the
pressures of being a professional prostitute, but you will meet all
personality types in Nevada's legal brothels.
I remember one lady who was so shy and demur that she could hardly make eye
contact with me. And she had been working for years! And I remember
several ladies with whom I spoke in their rooms, trying to agree to terms of
pleasure, but giving up because it was obvious that despite their beauty it
would be impossible to have fun with them because frankly they were just too
bitchy. But most of the ladies are very nice people.
These women are of all types. Lots of Caucasians of course, but lots of
Blacks, some Asians and some Hispanics, and a fair number that are a
favorite of mine, Native American girls.
And they come in all body shapes and types. Short, tall, fat, thin, old,
young.
Some of them are college students, and others have college degrees. There
was this one chick with a Masters in Psychology ...
But are they happy? I've heard Dr. Joyce Brothers say that there is no such
thing as the "Happy Hooker". Well, I'm an expert on this, and the truth is
that half or so probably aren't all that happy but stay in this line of work
because of the money (but then isn't that true of most professions?). Of
the remainder, most are reasonably happy and a few are very well-adjusted
indeed, love their work, and are a pleasure to be around. Again, not much
different than most other professions.
One pattern I've noticed is that a disproportionately large number of them
are military brats.
I've met ladies from all over the United States and a few foreign ladies.
Lots of Californians and Texans. And they are of all religious faiths; lots
of Southern Baptists and Catholics, and I've met just about all other
denominations including Lutherans, Mormons (very sensual), and one very wild
Jehovah's Witness. Then there was the lady whose mother was a Russian Jew,
and the Thai girl (Buddhist) who gave me a massage by walking on my back.
But I have yet to knowingly boing an atheist; none of the ladies have
professed being one. Perhaps because sex is such a religious experience...
Listen, fellows, whatever your type of lady is, she's waiting for you in one
of Nevada's brothels. Its just a problem of finding her.
9.6 "Any strange goings-on in the brothels?"
Besides all of that sex going on there? The answer is, by-and-large, "No".
These are businesses, and scaring off customers is not what capitalism is
all about. Things are generally quite orderly; I have never seen
"bouncers" hanging around (except for the uniformed guard at The Chicken
Ranch) but there must be at least one hiding somewhere.
All of the brothels have bars that you can sit and have a drink at, and
sometimes there is some rowdiness there, but generally things are rather
sedate.
9.7 "Just how different are the `ranches'?"
There are some real differences. Let me talk first about size.
The three brothels that I an reviewing are the largest (to my knowledge),
and are definitely the highest profile. If you have never been to a brothel
before then I would recommend trying one of these three, because at these
bigger houses you get a wider selection to choose from. But eventually it
is worth your while to check out some of the smaller houses because the
pressure to choose a lady is lesser at the smaller houses, though the
selection isn't quite so good in general.
The real point (from my perspective) is finding a really good-looking lady.
Your chances are about equal at The Mustang Ranch and at The Chicken Ranch,
with The Chicken Ranch having a slight edge. The Sagebrush Ranch is close
behind.
I've been around Nevada's brothels enough that I've seen, on several
occasions, the same lady in different houses. One I've seen in four
different brothels! My impression is that a lot of the women who start off
as legal prostitutes in Nevada get their start at The Chicken Ranch. But I
have noticed a steady migration of experienced ladies going from The Chicken
Ranch to Sheri's next door or to The Sagebrush. What I don't like about The
Chicken Ranch is just how unfriendly they are; if you don't pick a lady
right now, then you can't just mingle with them, talk, and get a closer look
like you can at the Mustang and Sagebrush ranches. Even the bar at The
Chicken Ranch is downright unfriendly, with the bartender being a uniformed
guard rather than the professional-looking bartender at The Mustang Ranch
or the grandmotherly looking bartender at The Sagebrush Ranch.
There are several ladies that I've met at The Chicken Ranch but then seen
later at a different ranch. They've all complained of the oppressive
atmosphere at The Chicken Ranch. The Mustang has a much less tense feeling
about it, and The Sagebrush is very relaxed indeed. I've lounged at The
Sagebrush for hours at a time, just watching the ladies and talking to
them. I've heard a few complaints about The Mustang, but the ladies at The
Sagebrush seem to be the happiest with the management there. There isn't
much difference between the three brothels concerning beautiful ladies, but
when it comes to soft-sell versus hard-sell, I recommend The Mustang and
The Sagebrush. It is easy to visit both The Mustang and The Sagebrush
because they are only about thirty miles apart.
And most of the smaller houses are much more relaxed than the big three
described above.
9.8 "All you need is money and a clean, healthy wanger?"
You learn the darnest things by posting a FAQ. My "brother" sent me the
following :
"It is sad but true that there are other factors as well. If you pay
attention while sitting at the bar and people-watching (something I, too,
like to do before and sometimes after `transacting business'), you will
notice that when the floor supervisor (not really "madams" in most places,
just another employee) uses a buzzer to call the women to the floor for a
lineup, there is a little code that they use: one buzz for a caucasion
male, two buzzes for a black or hispanic male, and three buzzes for `other',
which may mean an asian male and or a handicapped male. The women are not
usually required to answer a lineup call with more than one buzz. The next
time you are talking with a woman (in her room, not at the bar), ask her
about this practice."
I will ask about this next time I'm in the company of a lady. As for a
trick you can play :
"I'll let you in on another `buzzer trick'. Have you noticed, in places
like the Mustang and Sagebrush, that when a cabbie comes in to pick up his
fare, the women are not called to line up? That is because the cabbie knows
to give the buzzer at the gate _two_ rings, to let the floor supervisor know
that he is not a potential customer (this trip, anyway!). As I seldom like
the pressure of choosing a woman out of a line-up, and prefer not to cause
the women to come to the parlor for a needless line-up (I'm going to sit
down at the bar and watch for a while, thanks all the same), I give the
buzzer at the gate a double ring, and then walk right up to the bar."
9.9 "What is your sexual fantasy?"
You know how major newpapers have food critics, who review and rate local
restaurants? My fantasy is that prostitution is legal all across the United
States, and I work for a national magazine as a ...
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10.0 A Recommendation.
10.1 "Well, who should I visit?"
By now you've read a lot about Nevada's legal brothels, and you should
understand that finding a really great lady is something of a random
process, where both beauty and a friendly disposition are quantities that
sometimes, but not always, go together. I want to make it easier for you to
get some satisfaction.
Her name is "Honey", and she works at The Mustang Ranch. I first met her
during the Summer of 1991, and have visited her every Summer since.
Honey is beautiful. She is young, tall (5'9"), lean, and has a figure that
is as nice as that of any supermodel. No kidding. Flawless skin, beautiful
face, nice breasts, long slender legs, the works. If it matters to you, she
is a brunette Caucasian.
Did I mention her eyes?
Ah, but there is so much more to Honey than just her outward appearance!
She is friendly though reserved, intelligent, sensual, and has a
distinctively dignified and regal bearing.
I remember just how impressed I was when I first met her. I couldn't
believe that such a wonderful lady was willing to work in a profession where
she was willing to have sex with fat, ugly pigs as myself. Let's take this
moment and say a prayer of thanks to God almighty for such blessings as
Honey. We're not worthy!!!
Let me describe a typical visit with Honey. The Mustang Ranch has bidets in
their bathrooms, so Honey will set the hot and cold water settings just
right and then ask me to squat onto it so that she can wash my genitals,
which feels great! Then she'll dry me off and wash herself, and then she is
ready to please me. I like some foreplay first, so I have her stand still
while I get a good feel of her legs, buttocks, back, shoulders, breasts, and
hard flat stomach, a good feel with my hands and my mouth (Yum!). Once I've
finished savoring her, I lay belly-down on the bed and Honey gives me a
really nice massage first with her hands and then with her entire body. I
can feel her stomach and breasts on my back, slowly, sensually, moving back
and forth. Then I roll over and she does much the same to my front, and
sucks my nipples. YOW! So now Honey puts a condom on my oh-so-very-stiff
weenie, and she performs an oral act which is still illegal in some states,
even between husband and wife (or so I've been told). What I like is how
Honey sits to my right facing me, with her legs spread so that I can see all
of her front and feel all over her lean, fine muscle toned body while she
gives me head and a short hand job. Then she gets on top, slips it inside,
and starts the old in-and-out at just the right pace. It is difficult for
me to describe this experience, since I'm not real sure exactly just what is
going on down there, but Honey is able to do things to your cock with her
pussy that most women either can't or won't do. Suffice it to say that it
is magic, and I soon squirt like I can't remember. She stays there awhile,
sitting while I whither away inside her, and then she gets up, takes off the
condom, and again I accompany her to the bidet for another washing.
Then it is back to bed, and we talk about what we've done the past year.
Honey remembers me, even though we only see each other once a year. She
remembers what we talked about before, including what I've shared about my
personal life. This amazes me, because Honey must see a lot of men. Honey
and I are movie fans, so we recommend movies and talk movie talk. Also,
Honey travels a lot and she tells me what her trip was like (she's traveled
in Egypt, along the Amazon River, etc.).
Eventually, I start to feel Nature's call again, Honey gets me up and going
with a hand job, and then more head, and finally I finish off with either
doggie style or missionary.
I can only describe my time with Honey as a religious experience!
Honey isn't always in, so I suggest that you call before making a special
trip to see her. Call The Mustang Ranch at (702) 342-0176 and ask if
"Honey" is in.
So, if you are so fortunate as to actually get a private audience with
Honey, then please tell her that you heard about her from this FAQ, and that
"the scientist" says hello. And you had better treat her nicely!
UPDATE : Today (Wednesday, December 21, 1994) I received an e-mail message
from a fellow that had read my earlier FAQ and went to visit "Honey" at the
Mustang Ranch. An excerpt from his message is :
"i just returned from my first visit to the mustang ranch. thanks to your
insightfull FAQ the experience was excellent. i called ahead and arrived
just as HONEY started her 11pm shift. what a beauty. rarely have i had
the chance to gaze upon such a lovely goddess let alone fill her honey pot
with my sweet juices. i count the days until i can return for more HONEY."
So there you have it, boys. It isn't just my imagination that "Honey" is
one of the wonders of the Universe, someone else feels the same way. Rumor
has it that she is going on vacation soon, so be sure to call ahead to see
if she is in. I'm making plans now for my next visit!
UPDATE (Tuesday, March 21, 1995) : Last Friday night I paid another visit
to the very lovely Honey. She is back from her vacation in Indonesia, and
more beautiful than ever. She intends to be at the Mustang for the next
four or five weeks, then be gone and return for the entire Summer. As
always, call the Mustang to see if she is in, though of course there are
other ladies there as well, not to mention the Mustang's competitors.
Her form is just as fine as ever, and she made me feel like I was the most
important man on earth. And I had the best sex I've ever had!
After we did it the first time, I laid there on the bed admiring her beauty
while she tended to herself in the bathroom. Great posture. How could I
have forgotten how tall, slim, and tightly packed she is? Her skin is soft
but backed by firm flesh, no sag anywhere. Her arms and hands are a little
bit bony, but I'm not complaining.
I keep getting e-mail from fellows who wonder how to identify her should
they go to the Mustang. Just ask for her by name, there is only one Honey
at the Mustang. I asked her if there could be another lady named Honey at
the Mustang, and she said no. There is only one, and if she isn't there
then nobody else will answer to the name of "Honey". If you think that the
lady is an imposter, then ask her to lift her hair off the back of her neck
and you will see a simple and somewhat stylish tattoo of a peacock or some
such bird. This you can see out by the bar; once you have her naked in her
room you can see the small ring in her navel which I saw last Summer, and
she now has a ring piercing her right nipple which interferred with my
usual breastfeeding technique. I asked her if it hurt when her nipple was
pierced, and she said yes, very. Honey is a fantastic woman, but can be
a little strange at times. But I love her anyway. And you will too,
should you ever meet her. She'll steal your heart away.
I asked Honey if she had any special messages that she wanted me to post
for you fellows, and she said no but maybe I should change this posting
every now and then. I'll think of something.
Honey said that some fellow showed up at the Mustang looking for her there
while she was gone on vacation, and that he had read about her in my FAQ.
If you are anxious to meet her, just call the Mustang to see if she is in.
Honey works the 11 PM to 11 AM shift, so you'll have to stay up a little
late, but ah! what a reward!
And be sure and give her my love.
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This is the end of the FAQ.
If you have questions, please send e-mail to : bashful@paranoia.com
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