Diet Pills for all who NEED DRUGS to HATE was Re: What We Need Is More HATE!

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

Date: Thu, Oct 11, 2001 10:11 AM

nu-monet wrote:
>

Okay, for all the INQUIRIES about GOOD DIET PILLS to make
you twitch and see things but WORK and make you drop a
few pounds, the FIRST THING I'm gonna tell you other
FAT LOSERS is the GOOD NEWS:

THEY ARE AVAILABLE WITHOUT A PRESCRIPTION! WEEEEEEEEE!
(think of that flash animation with the Weeee! squirrel)

ANYWAYs, I got the pills at a health food store, SO THEY
GOT TO BE GOOD! High Health, GNC, or one of dem other
chain stores.

AND (drum roll), they are called "METABOLIC SUPREME".
WEEEEEEEEEEEE!

A listing of the ingriedaments:

Vitamin E,Magnesium,Zinc,Chromium,Guarana seed concentrate,
Ma Huang concentrate,Bee Pollen,Ginseng Root,Ginger Root,
Lecithin,Bovine Complex(?*?),Damiana Leaf,Sarsaparilla Root,
Goldenseal,Nettle Leaf,Gotu Kola,Spirulina Algae,Royal Jelly,
L-carnitine,L-tartrate,BPP Enzyme Blend,Bromelain,Papain,
Pancreatin,Dicalcium Phosphate,Cellulose,Silica,Stearic Acid,
Magnesium Stearate.

(*)Concentrated eau de Cow, I guess.

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

--
*
"Burmese Python eats Pit Bull. Doo dah, doo dah."
*
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Diet Pills for all who NEED DRUGS to HATE was Re: What We Need Is More HATE!
From: Dave White <David.White@one.at>

>
> (*)Concentrated eau de Cow, I guess.

That would likely be Taurine, best known from the soft drink "Reb Bull".

This fun-filled psychoactive cow protein is also used in cat food. It
seems cats have a dietary requirement for taurine, which I think
explains many aspects of feline behavior.

std::
Either that, or it's bull testicle juice...
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "St. Marc the Perpetually Amused" <disciple@templeoferis.org>

Keep in mind that although this is sold at the "General Nutrition" store,
and that these are not, for the most part, synthetic compounds, many of them
are powerful drugs and can adversely react with other supplements, drugs, or
medical condtions. Ma Huang, in particular, has a reputation as being
harmful to some people. If it works for you, I'm happy, and I'm not telling
you not to spread the word. But everybody should remember that even if it
wasn't made by the Corporate BioPharmecutical arm of the Conspiracy, the
Corporate GoodnessNLightFeelgood arm of the Conspiracy will just as happily
fuck your body over (and not in the good Las Vegas way) to get some of your
cash.

Incidentally, Damiana is also an aphrodesiac. I guess they figure you'll
lose so much weight everybody will want to have sex with you.

St. Marc

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

> nu-monet wrote:

>
> A listing of the ingriedaments:
>
> Guarana seed concentrate,
> Ma Huang concentrate,
>Damiana Leaf
>Gotu Kola

Those all make me SICK! Damiana made me want to pick fights, Ma Huang
is like eating 10 psuedoephedrines, Gotu Kola and Guarana both have
some kind of caffeine that clashes with normal everyday coffee-derived
caffeine. Just for me personally. The vitamins sound great. But I can't
even mix Coke and coffee within the same hour without suffering almost
an allergic reaction -- the damn HabaFroffee Zipuloffee molecule
clashes with the Con-extracted pared down molecule used in soft drinks.
Like mixing wine and whisky... bad backfires and chemical moire
patterns. Hmmm... makes me want to go downstairs and knock back a A&W
Root Beer and a fresh ground mug o' French Roast murk just to get
fucked up. Won't do it though. Don't get old, kids. This self
discipline stuff sucks.

I can see why they made pharmaceutical Dexies, Bennies and all those
wonderful clean pep pills VERY CONTROLLED, too. Hmmph. More and more,
it's turning out that Philo was right -- sleep is the ultimate drug.
It's about the only one I ever get to do anymore. But you know what? I
DO THE HELL OUT OF IT.

And with that I shall go take a nap.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ren <ren@bookofshadows.org>

But where is the Frop?
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: andreux <andreux@eterna.net>

But... but... but...

YOU'RE ALL DRINKING *COW*!

*drinking* cow...

why not just juice a t-bone steak or something?

-andreux

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: andreux <andreux@eterna.net>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote:
>> nu-monet wrote:
>> A listing of the ingriedaments:
>>
>> Guarana seed concentrate,
>> Ma Huang concentrate,
>>Damiana Leaf
>>Gotu Kola
>
> Those all make me SICK! Damiana made me want to pick fights,

Uh oh... You had better watch it...

That blue-bottled "get-yer-girl-goin'" juice, Niagra
has Damiana in it... It's supposed to act as an
"aphrodisiac". Ergo, don't YOU be drinkin' any of it,
lest ya wanna fight rather than fornicate.

> Don't get old, kids. This self
> discipline stuff sucks.

Who says it's just for the old these days?

> I can see why they made pharmaceutical Dexies, Bennies and all those
> wonderful clean pep pills VERY CONTROLLED, too. Hmmph. More and more,
> it's turning out that Philo was right -- sleep is the ultimate drug.
> It's about the only one I ever get to do anymore. But you know what? I
> DO THE HELL OUT OF IT.
> And with that I shall go take a nap.

Kava-kava... Valerian root... Chamomile...

sleep aids. tho you can develop a slight cravin'
for Chamomile after a while... however, there are
worse things to be addicted to.

-andreux
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

>
> Those all make me SICK! Damiana made me want to
> pick fights,...

Hellfire. Ain't no herb created yet that can match
good ol' fightin' whiskey. The troops found out that
they make whiskey from the very remnants of cane, after
the sugar been strained out.
You knock down about two shots of fightin' whiskey and
you will punch out the person sittin' next to you, even
if they're your commanding officer or your mother.
It put whole units out of commission in WWII. Had half
their people in the hospital with broken somethings.

Now, the Slivovitz plum brandy they drink in the Balkans
is reputed to have just about the same effect...

--
*
"Burmese Python eats Pit Bull. Doo dah, doo dah."
*
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: SubGenius Spice <SubGeniusSpice@jbeyqarg.ngg.arg>

"alt.slack", featuring andreux...Take 36...ACTION!...

[...]

> But... but... but...
>
> YOU'RE ALL DRINKING *COW*!
>
> *drinking* cow...
>

right.

cow is much better snorted.

--
Prerecorded for this time zone.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ren <ren@bookofshadows.org>

I heard they put dead Taliban ground up brains, bones, and nerves in
those relief packages and call it TBS! What day is it? The tattoo on my
arm says it's X-Day.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: ren <ren@bookofshadows.org>

This reminds me of that movie where that guy's mother was on diet pills
and the fridge jumped up at her and she ended up in the loony bin.
Speed, speed, speedy! What day is it? I have this tattoo on my arm that
says it's X-Day. -- Ren

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Original file name: Diet Pills for all who NEED DRU - converted on Thursday, 20 December 2001, 03:30