gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman) wrote:
> jch9334@is2.nyu.edu says...
>
> >
> >I've seen ALIENS land in my BACKYARD while high on drugs, but NEVER have
> >I hallucinated my brain as TWO EGGS and BACON in a FRYING PAN!!!!!!!!
> >
> >(Bill Hicks?)
>
> Yep. I saw him do that bit. Bill Hicks was the only comedian since
> Andy Kaufman who didn't deserve to be taken out and shot.
>
> -Joe Newman
You're god damn right. It JUST FIGURES that FINALLY a "comedian" comes
along that I can not only STAND, but can PRACTICALLY WORSHIP, and ENVY
SINFULLY, and he goes and DIES of a random cancer before he even gets TWO
CD's out. ("DANGEROUS" and "RELENTLESS"). Bill Hicks was no mere fucking
comedian but a PREACHER, a PROPHET HOWLING LONELY AND ALONE IN THE
WILDERNESS, the only stand-up comic since LENNY BRUCE to actually have
something worthwhile to say. And he's DEAD DEAD DEAD at the age of thirty
or so.
I don't listen to his tapes much because every time I do, I'm SHAMED that
I haven't worked harder to develop a GOOD ACT. Sure I'm an
anti-establishment preacher, but I feel like SOLD-OUT, WARMED OVER SHIT
compared to Bill Hicks, just because he's so vastly much better at it. It
makes me SICK that I'm still alive and he's dead. That bastard. I hate him
for making me feel so ashamed.
Imagine Hicks on Stern's show. Battle of the titans. But perhaps it wasn't
Fated. As much as I admire Howard Stern and consider him a Great American,
I have a feeling that he'd be too morally intimidated by Hicks to be able
to work with him. Because that's where that chain smoking, gratuitously
cussing, dope-gobbling seedy motherfucker Hicks excelled-- morality. He
probably WAS JESUS REBORN and we just blew it off.
Bill Hicks died for LENNY BRUCE's sins.
Makes me want to cry. But Hicks wouldn't want me to do that. He'd want me
to cuss like a sailor while saying stuff more true than is allowed by man
or beast. And I shall try to work my way up to the cosmically high
standard of ranting that he set. At my convenience, of course -- to do
otherwise would be to blaspheme the memory of Hicks/Jesus.
Sniffle, snort... sob... DID YOU EVER HAVE A DAWG?? (sniff)
Amateur Stang the pathetic
--
Copyright 1995 by Rev. Ivan Stang / 1st Orthodox Stangian
MegaFisTemple Lodge of People's Covenant Church of the
Wrath of Dobbs Yeti, Resurrected / The SubGenius Foundation,Inc.
PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214 / Fax 214-320-1561 / PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Bill Hicks RIP (was: Re: Zippy or some shit)
From: clavis@ix.netcom.com (John P. Olinyk)
Date: 19 May 1995 09:37:40 GMT
i.stang@metronet.com (Rev. Ivan Stang) writes:
(RE: BILL HICKS)
>You're god damn right. It JUST FIGURES that FINALLY a "comedian" comes
>along that I can not only STAND, but can PRACTICALLY WORSHIP, and ENVY
>SINFULLY, and he goes and DIES of a random cancer before he even gets
TWO CD's out. ("DANGEROUS" and "RELENTLESS"). Bill Hicks was no mere
>fucking comedian but a PREACHER, a PROPHET HOWLING LONELY AND ALONE IN
>THE WILDERNESS, the only stand-up comic since LENNY BRUCE to actually
>have something worthwhile to say. And he's DEAD DEAD DEAD at the age of
>thirty or so.
Bill Hicks: Dec 16th, 1961 to Feb 26th, 1994. The sonofabitch gets a
SubGenius holiday if ANY non-cardholder does. Comedy Central has a
1-hour Spotlight posthumous memorial kind of thing. Christ onna crutch,
this guy had it. Makes me wish I believed in an afterlife for anyone
besides my dad and my dog.
>
>I don't listen to his tapes much because every time I do, I'm SHAMED that
>I haven't worked harder to develop a GOOD ACT. Sure I'm an
>anti-establishment preacher, but I feel like SOLD-OUT, WARMED OVER SHIT
>compared to Bill Hicks, just because he's so vastly much better at it.
That, actually, makes me feel inspired and optimistic, because, (Sorry
Massa Stang), I'm 24. Going on 25 next month. I'm working with an improv
group, and I get a LOT of solo stage time. Newmyn's Nose (that's the
improv group) gets some stage time with ANOTHer kinda lame group, and
they have stand-up comedians on.
It's a fucking freak show. Typical rejoinders of TYPICAL (i.e. PINK TO
THE FUCKING CARTILIDGE) stand-uppers like "So, who else is in therapy?"
and "I tried to lose weight" and "Yes, I'm ugly, I know..." It's the
fucking Seinfeld disease that's EATING out the heart of the concept of
one man with a microphone and no podium: "HEY! AND WHAT ABOUT THAT
AIRLINE FOOD? AND WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?" Didjaevernotice bullshit that
makes me want to puke into paintball pellets and shove the barrel into
their empty eyesockets after... but I digress.
I'm gonna ask for some stage time. I really feel what Bill Hicks felt. I
was ranting to someone in "the bar" last night, and I really felt
something about (what _I_ consider to be) True SubGenius Attitude: WE
ARE CYNICAL, BUT WE ARE NOT PESSIMISTIC. WE ARE TOTALLY 100% CYNICAL AND WASHED-OUT AND DRIP-DRYED, BUT WE ARE ACTUALLY THE MOST OPTIMISTIC FUCKING PEOPLE ON THE PLANET. I was attacking the current state of
evvyting; talking about how parents know their co-workers better than
their kids (thank you, RevX), and this lady said, "but you HAVE to
work!"... and I felt that pause, and I said... "NO, YOU _DON'T!_" It's
so fucking simple when your eyes are open.
>Sniffle, snort... sob... DID YOU EVER HAVE A DAWG?? (sniff)
S'what I said, Rev. Stang. I also mentioned Heaven. My dad's wearing
those fishing rubber hip-boots, and he's hip-deep in the shore-water,
and he's fishing. And Duke, our dog, is running around the beach,
chasing seagulls and squirrels (it's Heaven, squirrels are everywhere),
and CATCHING 'em, and savaging the odd mailman now and again: grabbing
him, shaking him to break his back, and laying in for a good
marrow-suck.
That's Heaven. Y'gotta wonder what Bill's doing up there. He had so many
complaints about down-here, y'gotta wonder what kinda pressure he's
putting on Yahweh to send 'em back.
Now let's pray...
the Grand Clavister
--
----------------------------------------------------
KEYS KEYS KEYS: C'mon, it's 5:30 in the fucking
morning. Send me keys or I'll shoot myself in the
testicles. Send them to: O.L.I.N.Y.K., P.O. Box
2559, Grand Central Station, New York, NY 10163-2559.
You betcha. $1 would be nice. C'mon, don't be any sort
of racial or ethnic stereotype. Except the SubG stereotype.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: ZIPPY LIVES
From: dynasor@infi.net (Dennis McClain-Furmanski)
On Fri. May 19, 1995, i.stang@metronet.com told All:
isc> Imagine Hicks on Stern's show. Battle of the titans. But perhaps it
> wasn't Fated. As much as I admire Howard Stern and consider him a
> Great American, I have a feeling that he'd be too morally
> intimidated by Hicks to be able to work with him. Because that's
> where that chain smoking, gratuitously cussing, dope-gobbling seedy
> motherfucker Hicks excelled-- morality. He probably WAS JESUS REBORN
> and we just blew it off.
The female po'bucker comedian with the low voice that finally got her own
sitcom a couple years ago, she said this is what Hicks really wanted to
be. Had her on the Comedy Central docu-comedy about him just last night.
isc> Bill Hicks died for LENNY BRUCE's sins.
Oh, I dunno, I don't think Lenny wanted them taken from him.
isc> Makes me want to cry. But Hicks wouldn't want me to do that. He'd
> want me to cuss like a sailor while saying stuff more true than is
> allowed by man or beast. And I shall try to work my way up to the
> cosmically high standard of ranting that he set. At my convenience,
> of course -- to do otherwise would be to blaspheme the memory of
> Hicks/Jesus.
He spent 3 of 4 nights for the last 10 years on stage. You ready for that?
* 2qwk! 1.26b3 * Luxuriantly hand-crafted from only the finest ASCII.
--
dynasor@infi.net The Doctor is on.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: ZIPPY LIVES
From: gunther@bga.com (Joe Newman)
dynasor@infi.net says...
>Stang wrote:
> isc> Makes me want to cry. But Hicks wouldn't want me to do that. He'd
> > want me to cuss like a sailor while saying stuff more true than is
> > allowed by man or beast. And I shall try to work my way up to the
> > cosmically high standard of ranting that he set. At my convenience,
> > of course -- to do otherwise would be to blaspheme the memory of
> > Hicks/Jesus.
>
>He spent 3 of 4 nights for the last 10 years on stage. You ready for that?
Not only that, after he was diagnosed, he was taking blood transfusions
in his dressing room before and/or after his shows. I saw him a few months
before he died, and I would have never guessed.
-Joe Newman
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