From: Atom8@Big.Wheel (H. H. The 8th Atom Funway)
March 2nd Cleveland Devival Review
By His Holiness The 8th Atom Funway
Gimme all the Cowboy Dave ya got. You should have seen him warming up for
his rant, sitting with his elbows on a little cocktail table, with his
blood flushed face viced between his palms, eyes clenched, and
chanting/mumbling his lines. That alone was worth the six dollar
admission. His actual stage performance was pure primordial ooze embodied
in volcanic sperm powered mad beatnik genius. Cowboy Dave's act is
genuine, archetypal, mesmerizing, and sexy as all get out! I have talent
and I know talent. Cowboy Dave not only has talent, he not only has
talent in spades, he is an immortal showman that has obviously been
roaming the earth and thrashing "Bob" for countless eons. On stage, he is
the cowboy AND the wild stallion. It took him about two seconds to pitch
my ass to the dirt. Not surprisingly, at the end of the night he had the
prettiest, most exotic babe in the bar at his side; young, smooth, and
decked in leopard to the nines. Rating: Four "Bobs"
Sadly, this was followed by Rev. Ivan Stang's pitiful, blabbering,
floundering attempt to get attention and sell a t-shirt. He fell down
twice trying to get on and off stage, and it wasn't on purpose! This
deluded acid burnout jabbered nervously for two minutes about who knows
what, and then ran out of steam and material. Not having the sense to get
off the stage, he resorted to showing the audience magazine covers and
making more disconnected jabber babble. At this point he was so desperate
that he resorted to the lowest levels of pandering to the audience. I
actually feared he was going to do something like insert a liquor soaked
tampon in his anus and then switch his hips and twirl the string! When he
held up The National Enquirer and stuttered something about God the
audience members simultaneously squashed their cigarette butts with their
black leather boots and sighed, "That's enough, let's go." Rating: Four
"Bobs"
The Euclid Tavern has all the charm and ambience of a subway restroom;
complete with graffiti and urine encrusted basement filth. This place is
little more than the dried up excrement of CBGB's of twentysome years
ago. If this stale crap trap hovel is where "Bob" leads you, turn back
before it's too late, least you stick to the Cosmic Floor.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: March 2nd Cleveland Devival Review
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 5, 2000 9:36 PM
Message-ID: <050320002136394250%stang@subgenius.com>
In article <MPG.132c4fde847772d4989681@news-server>, H. H. The 8th Atom
Funway <Atom8@Big.Wheel> wrote:
> that he resorted to the lowest levels of pandering to the audience. I
> actually feared he was going to do something like insert a liquor soaked
> tampon in his anus and then switch his hips and twirl the string!
NEXT time! I forgot the tampon.
--
Copyright 2000 by Rev. Ivan Stang / 2nd Orthodox Stangian
MegaFisTemple Lodge of People's Covenant Church of the
Wrath of Dobbs Yeti, Resurrected: PO Box 19355 Cleveland OH 44119
The SubGenius Foundation,Inc.: PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214
http://www.subgenius.com -- SubSITE of Slack / PRABOB
Fax: 216-738-0150
Original file name: March 2nd Cleveland DevivalÉ.02
This file was converted with TextToHTML - (c) Logic n.v.