Date: Sun, 18 Feb 1996 12:28:46 GMT
And here I thought yesterday was going to to be a disappointing day. I
was going to miss the Devival because I had to *work* - on a Saturday
night. (Fool that I am, I've worked Saturday nights on a regular basis
for the past four years. A life? What's that?) But I figured that
"Bob" should take priority over any fucking JOB, and so I repented, QUIT
MY JOB (for one night, at least), and Slacked off.
And hell Yes, it was worth it!
A 6 PM Devival may not attract quite the numbers that you saw in Yew
York, but it was still Saturday night and it drew a good crowd
nonetheless. The floor was nearly empty fifteen minutes before the
scheduled start, but "Bob" was with us and people flowed into the place
like a river. During the high point of Stang's Rant, the floor was
packed (I'm not exaggerating, either), and he had the crowd EATING OUT OF
HIS HAND! Who knows how many people were converted last night - but
many of them were. Stang Ranted against the evils of the Conspiracy,
Normality, how JOBS are the worst cult imaginable (and I should know, I
had to quit mine to go to this show), and then he got personal and
revealed his true side to us all...how he looks into the mirror each day
and asks if it's really WORTH it. But when you saw the glazed,
zombie-like, 'frop-induced expressions on the faces of the crowd last
night, you know the answer to that.
The reason why that asshole PAT ROBERTSON was able to make an unsuccessful
run for the Presidency was because STANG never declared his candidacy. If
he ever decided to run for office, Robertson would be HISTORY. But
unfortunately, most of the Pinks out there would never want to vote for a
Patrio-Psychotic AnarchoMaterialistic candidate, when they'd rather vote
for something nice and simple and STUPID, like a Republican or a Democrat.
(Sorry to burst your bubble, but the Libertarian party is never going to
get anywhere because they're just as anal retentive as the Democrats and
Republicans.)...anyways, Stang's Ranting had the crowd ROARING its
approval.
Brother Cleve Duncan flew in all the way from Dobbstown to be at this
show, and he kept a steady stream of anti-Church Muzak that provided the
perfect background for the Ranting. He started off the show with a
medley of his greatest hits, capped off with that old favorite, "'Bob' Is
My Load" done in a jazzy Beatnik style. (Any second and I would have
expected him to rise from his seat, don a beret, and start reciting Jack
Kerouac.)
And Circus Apocalypse is TWISTED! FUCKING WARPED! INSANE! When SubSITE
reports that they actually sew "The Impaled"'s mouth shut, they're NOT
KIDDING! It's NOT a fake act...there was no fake blood. THAT WAS REAL
BLOOD spurting from his mouth, testicles, and other organs, drenching the
front rows of the crowd and ruining my white shirt. Nails were hammered
directly into people's faces. Eyeballs were impaled with screwdrivers.
Insane lunatics BURST from straitjackets, and then they spat out
fireballs like DEMONS FROM THE VERY PIT OF HELL ITSELF!
AND, many of the denizens of alt.slack were treated to the first live
performance by Bill T. Miller, the KING OF SLACK and leader of the mighty
KINGS OF FEEDBACK! He felt the touch of the Anti-"Bob" up there on the
stage, and at one point Stang had to rush up there and perform a laying
on of hands. Bill gave out lots of FREE SHIT (only to entice people to
get to the sales tables and BUY MERCHANDISE, of course)
And best of all, Stang got the whole show on VIDEOTAPE. We're going to
be seeing a new Church video soon, capping all the highlights of this
tour...and based on last night alone, there are many highlights.
As if THAT wasn't enough, I got to meet several of the regulars on
alt.slack in person for the first time. Dad Townsend came down all the
way from Maine for this show, and he got everything on cassette tape...in
fact, he probably got the best audio copy of the show. He's going to
have to dub copies of this for everyone. Chris Tuck made it all the way
from Jamaica (Plain, that is), I was introduced to John Blackmer, and I
was even re-acquainted with an old enemy of mine, the mighty Ragnar from
talk.origins, alt.atheism, Argus and the Boston Bullet BBS.
The proprietors of the Middle East were unprepared for the intense barrage
of hellish, unearthly sights and displays, and so they kicked everyone out
and set up a NORMAL rock band instead. On my way out, Bill Miller and
Vernon Tart grabbed me and forced me into the KOF van, and I was whisked
away to Brother Cleve's house along with Stang, Jesus Bevilacqua, Circus
Apocalypse, and other friends, where we were treated to a guided tour of
Cleve's house.
It may not be wise to reveal this to the worldwide audience of alt.slack,
but the truth must be told: if you are ever given the chance to visit
Brother Cleve Duncan's residence, DO IT! He has the most AMAZING
collection of weird tapes, records, posters, pop art, books, alcoholic
beverages, and cultural artifacts in the entire Boston area...if not the
entire WESTERN HEMISPHERE. Even Stang, the professional crackpotologist
and collector of strange music, was blown away by the sights. Cleve's
House is like the Naked City (as he told us), where there are a thousand
tales all waiting to be told. Stang could devote an entire episode of
the Hour of Slack to this place! (and he got a lot of it on video, too.)
So once again, "Bob" Dobbs has shown that the path to SLACK is always the
right one. I thought yesterday was going to be a disappointing
day...I'd work, kick myself for missing the Devival, go home, and go to
bed. But instead, I had my GUTS ripped out, my HEAD pounded by unearthy
sights and sounds, more CHURCH AIR than I've ever had since I became a
SubGenius minister, and the company of friends.
What more can you ask for a Saturday night?
--
Reverend Modemac (modemac@netcom.com)
First Online Church of "Bob" "There is no black and white."
PGP Key Fingerprint: 47 90 41 70 B4 5B 06 90 7B 38 4E 11 8A ED 80 DF
URL: http://www.tiac.net/users/modemac/
(FINGER modemac@netcom.com for a FREE SubGenius Pamphlet!)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: christuck@aol.com (ChrisTuck)
Date: 21 Feb 1996 08:33:47 -0500
Jesus H. RED ROARING Christ!
The Boston Devival was an uplifting and spiritually enriching experience.
The Reverend Stang, well, he preached from the heart, his words rang true
and touched the crowd of eager seekers deeply. Many souls came to "Bob"
that evening.
Damn few will be on the Saucers, though. Heh. Heh.Heh.
Brother Cleve and his Lush Orchestra serenaded the masses with uplifting
music and tales of Dobbstown in Malaysia.
Ciscus Apocolypse, well, mere HUMAN words do not exist to describe the
exibition.
I was blessed and filled with Slack when I was called to the stage to
strap David Apocolypse into a straitjacket. My fingers trembled with
ecstasy as I TIGHTENED the Big Red Straps of leather.
Finally, the music of Kings of Feedback uplifted us all with it's
spiritual message of Slack and redemption for the Yeti.
Oh, and the video barrage tape was unique, including as it did, porn,
stock footage and the most recent "killing" of "Bob". The perfect backdrop
to the anti-music.
A final rant by Stang, complete with firebreathing by David Apocolypse and
the grand finale of Andrew the Impaled GETTING HIS FUCKING LIPS SEWN SHUT.
FOR REAL!
My head exploded to see such slackful entertainment.
Plus, I got to meet the Rev. Modemac in person.
A fine example of Yetsyny, masquerading as a MereHuman.
I was slackfilled meeting him and a few others as well.
Hopefully, we'll see a summer Boston devival with the full cast of mutants
and geeks.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Brother Cleve <bcleve@tiac.net>
Date: 19 Feb 1996 19:37:30 GMT
I believe Rev. Modemac's glorious descriptions of the final night of the
Slack Crudsade sum the nights festivities up beautifully. This first
crusade of the year was a mighty squirtin affair, and it fills my soul
with joy to know that it won't be the last one. Now that Stang and Co
have withstood the pressures of the North central and eastern US in the
dead of winter, can a tour of the deep south in August be far behind?
(Prepare thineself New Orleans, Austin and Atlanta). Hope all of you in
the towns that were visited got out from behind your monitors and
checked out this incredible display of skullfucking depravity.
When last seen Stang,J.B., and the Apocalypse comperes were frapping
off into the west, secure in the thoughts of Dobbs' pleasure with a
"job", so to speak, well done. EEEEIIIIEEEEIIIIEEEEEIIII!!!!!
br. cleve, roving emissionary
Original file name: Boston Dev. IT WAS É
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