From: zPRONO <nenslo@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Mon, Apr 17, 2000 8:04 PM
Message-ID: <38FBA6AA.692B@subgenius.com>
Stang told me how he helped one of the very STUPIDEST of all subgenii
partially alleviate that stupidity with this saying: Wisdom is when you
think of a really stupid thing to say, and then DON'T SAY IT.
I think I would add a second stage of wisdom which could help many other
people: Wisdom is when you think of a really funny or interesting thing
to say, and then DON'T SAY IT. Because you probably don't know that it
ISN'T funny or interesting, and even if a few of your listeners are
appreciative, some of them are only acting appreciative or are merely
masking their boredom, exasperation, or despair.
I like to have CONVERSATIONS. That's where people take turns talking
about something. That's not where one person talks and talks and talks
and nobody else gets a turn. That's not where the times other people
are talking are dead periods for you to formulate new witticisms.
It makes you feel witty, entertaining and creative to speak in a funny
voice when you get to the funny part of the story, to act things out
with erratic gestures and sound effects, but it makes you LOOK like a
dumbass and SOUND incoherent.
When ranting, know what you are going to say beforehand, then say it.
Very few people can speak extemporaneously onstage and still be
interesting.
If you must read to the audience, don't read as fast as you can. If you
are afraid it is too long, edit it to 200 words or less.
Always leave them wanting more. That means DO LESS.
It IS possible to sing a song that tells a roomful of people that their
town sucks, they are all idiots and they should just blow their brains
out, and have them sing along, cheer and applaud.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: SOME THINGS I LEARNED IN SEATTLE
From: Legume <legume@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Tue, Apr 18, 2000 11:08 AM
Message-ID: <38FC7A73.B6E@subgenius.com>
zPRONO wrote:
>
> Stang told me how he helped one of the very STUPIDEST of all subgenii
> partially alleviate that stupidity with this saying: Wisdom is when you
> think of a really stupid thing to say, and then DON'T SAY IT.
>
> I think I would add a second stage of wisdom which could help many other
> people: Wisdom is when you think of a really funny or interesting thing
> to say, and then DON'T SAY IT.
And so must I add to this, to go beyond Nenslo's second stage of wisdom
to a stage of ENLIGHTENMENT;
When you think of a really funny or interesting thing, DON'T THINK IT.
--
Dr. K."Cortez" Legume
"My energies are much better spent teaching people to
eat pork than teaching pigs to be civilized."
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