WELCOME ABOARD THE SUBGENIUS FIELD TRIP TO AMSTERDAM
DOKSTOK 2001

THESE ARE YOUR INSTRUCTIONS.
THESE ARE YOUR ONLY INSTRUCTIONS

The house party and fin d'seacle freak show "parade" is something even the back-to-gabbers do, with a pumped up number of beats per minute, ten pills down your gob for 20 hours of chomping your bit, no ambience save for a couple of yellow cube lights haven't been able to kill.

Also consider the fact that bouncing around on bad pills (probably speed, if nothing worse) or bad coke (probably speed, if nothing worse) is considered a definite no-no, never mind what you heard. And then, is it really your idea of fun to stand around some crossroads with no clue as to your whereabouts, with a city map in hand which has snakes for roads crawling about, because you're hallucinating like an oilslide? Well then, simply get to know a few people first, which is not such a hard thing to do in Amsterdam, and all kinds of possibilities will, if need be, arise by their own accord. In the meantime, remember: there's much more to be discovered!

It is not a message from "Bob," it is not a suggestion from Sterno, it is not even a bill from Jesus. It is a short but supremely practical excerpt from the huge Amsterdam guidebook that we found in our hotel rooms last year, AMSTERDAM XXX INSIGHT. This is an exact, verbatim copy from that guide book.