From: "Artemia Salina" <y2k@sheayright.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Fri, Jul 11, 2003 3:24 AM
I figure its safe now, since everyone has gone
to their homes, to detail my activities at
Brushwood this year, so here goes:
I packed up my truck with all of the surveillance
equipment I'd be needing on Thursday night, the
3rd, and headed out to upstate New York from
here in Connecticut. The 4 hour drive was
uneventful until I rolled into Fernwood (or
whatever that little hick town was called),
where I was stopped by a local constable
and ticketed for speeding and a noisy muffler.
After making my way into Sherman and about a mile
from Brushwood's entrance I killed my truck's lights
and rolled past quietly. After scouting the campground's
perimeter and available cover I parked to the side of
a
narrow dirt road which was nearby and covered my truck
with pine bows. It was still dark, so I settled in behind
the
wheel for some much needed shut-eye; I'd need to be
at the top of my game come daylight.
I awoke at about 5:30am, so it was light enough to apply
my camouflage face paint and climb into my coveralls
with
the dried grass stitched into them. It was now about
6:00am,
so I grabbed my pack and made my way down the road to
the edge of the campground. From the tree line I could
see that almost everyone was still asleep. Emboldened
by this, I stalked my way to the nearest out building
to
get a better look. Yep, just one or two drunks staggering
around, oblivious to everything except their need to
find
a portapotty and yark their guts up. One poor fucker
looked
like he'd be combing dried vomit and leaves out of his
hair
for the next week.
I settled in behind the tent of Jacques Treatment (I'm
sure,
from the pictures I've seen in a.b.s and from his X-Day
report).
Man can that guy snore! Lying on my belly, motionless,
I waited
for everyone to start waking up. Only then would I make
my move.
Several hours passed. It was now 8:30am. Several more
hours
passed. It was now 10:30am, and finally people began
to crawl
out from their shelters. As more and more people began
to mill
around, I slowly crawled on my belly toward the main
pavilion,
stopping and remaining motionless whenever anyone got
too
near. The headset of my two-way radio was silent, which
was
to be expected since I had come alone.
When I was about 100 yards from the pavilion and hard
cover,
one guy began walking right toward me. When he was within
twenty feet of me I really thought the jig was up, but
just before
he tripped over me he was called back by someone else.
I
know now from pictures posted in a.b.s that that guy
was
Two Beans. If he had gotten five feet closer I'd have
had to
garrot him. With that bit of unpleasantness avoided
I continued
onward.
Knowing that the pavilion area is covered with gravel
I made my way to a bush and changed into my gravel-camo
suit.
As people milled around, some of them elite members
of the
church hierarchy, I crawled slowly -- imperceptibly
slowly --
across the gravel floor of the pavilion, under wires
and cables,
between chairs, and finally under the stage itself.
From this
vantage point I could clearly see the ankles and footwear
of
everyone there.
Satisfied that I could move amongst these people with
impunity,
I made my way back to my truck, following the same route
I had
used to enter. As I got back to the tree line, I ran
into both Jlahn
and purple, who were hiding behind trees, watching the
activity
in the campground intently.
I would return numerous times in both daylight and after
dark until
the 6th of July, when I packed up and headed home.
See you all next year.
--
Embrace your inner bullying coward.
Drive an SUV.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: Two Beans <twobeans@godhatesyou.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Fri, Jul 11, 2003 4:07 AM
Message-ID: <vgss0s6b43if99@corp.supernews.com>
Artemia Salina wrote:
>
> When I was about 100 yards from the pavilion and
hard cover,
> one guy began walking right toward me. When he
was within
> twenty feet of me I really thought the jig was
up, but just before
> he tripped over me he was called back by someone
else. I
> know now from pictures posted in a.b.s that that
guy was
> Two Beans. If he had gotten five feet closer I'd
have had to
> garrot him. With that bit of unpleasantness avoided
I continued
> onward.
>
I knew I smelled brine shrimp over by there.
--
2B
http://www.eyeofthewarp.com/twobeans
http://www.walkingdead.net/~twobeans
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Fri, Jul 11, 2003 1:43 PM
Message-ID: <20030711134315.23622.00000172@mb-m22.aol.com>
Artemia Salina leaked:
>under wires and cables,
>between chairs, and finally under the stage itself.
From this
>vantage point I could clearly see the ankles and
footwear of
>everyone there.
Doesn't the Rabbi have a GREAT set of ankles?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: "Artemia Salina" <y2k@sheayright.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sat, Jul 12, 2003 1:05 AM
Message-ID: <pan.2003.07.12.05.05.29.477213@sheayright.com>
On Fri, 11 Jul 2003 17:43:15 +0000, Bobdiddley wrote:
> Artemia Salina leaked:
>>under wires and cables,
>>between chairs, and finally under the stage
itself. From this
>>vantage point I could clearly see the ankles
and footwear of
>>everyone there.
>
> Doesn't the Rabbi have a GREAT set of ankles?
She has a great set of everything that comes in sets.
--
Embrace your inner bullying coward.
Drive an SUV.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: "Reverend Sinphaltimus Exmortus" <RevSExmortus@nyc.rr.com>
As well as the stand alone items.
--
Sincerely yours, forever Bob's,
The Reverend Sinphaltimus Exmortus
of the
First Ever Digital Church of Mind Slack
http://www.Digital-Church.com
A Totally Independent Clench of
The Church of the SubGenius
THE SUBGENIUS FOUNDATION
PO BOX 204206
AUSTIN, TX 78720-4206
Send $1 and S.A.S.E. for more info
or visit
www.subgenius.com
or email
RevSExmortus@nyc.rr.com
or die pink
or kill me
"Exterminate all rational thought" W.S.B.
16*2*!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: rabbs@subgenius.com (Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde)
Umm, I suppose my ankles and the rest of me are flattered.
How did I
get into the middle of this thread, anyway? I barely
even got NEAR
the stage in the pavilion, unless you mean you invaded
T-Base's stage.
--With love, the Rabbs
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: "Artemia Salina" <y2k@sheayright.com>
Well personally, I only responded with a comment about
you because
I felt compelled, as a heterosexual, to depreciate the
constant rumors
of my being homosexual.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
--
"A friend gave me a picture book on Scientology,
and through
this I was introduced to the writings of L. Ron Hubbard,
who
had founded the religion." -- Tom Cruise
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: "Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde" <rabbs@subgenius.com>
Yeah, I've noticed many of the compliments to the women
on this ng are on
the knee-jerk reaction side.
--With love, the Rabbs
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: "Artemia Salina" <y2k@sheayright.com>
Well, I wasn't really knee-jerking, actually. You have
to remember that
there is a constant subtext in male-on-male intercourse,
and that
subtext is pretty simple-minded. Stripping away the
trappings of
language from the exchange above, we may more readily
see the
subtext of which I speak:
Me: <general blather>
Bobdiddley: I'm not gay, are you?
Me: Well no, I'm not gay.
Sexmortis: Hey guys, I'm not gay either.
<Silent nods of approval from me and Bobdiddley>
You shouldn't take this exchange as either inappropriate
attention or as a
feigned compliment. It's really just a bunch of guys
reaffirming their non-gayness
amongst each other.
--
"A friend gave me a picture book on Scientology,
and through
this I was introduced to the writings of L. Ron Hubbard,
who
had founded the religion." -- Tom Cruise
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: My X-Day-at-Brushwood Report
From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)
While I don't dispute the veracity of Artemia's analysis
above, it was I who
interjected the lovely Rabbi's name into this thread,
and I pray that she is
more flattered than annoyed at the ongoing admiration
of her inimitable beauty.
In case they don't have mirrors where you live, you're
all the way
good-looking. I saw the geezers snapping your photo,
and while you were
cooperatively posing and smiling, they were pointing
their cameras down AT YOUR
ANKLES!
I'm a bit beyond having to dispute rumours of homosexuality,
as even the most
desparate of gays have quit flirting with me. There
are advantages to
age-enhancement.
For the record, my viewpoint on it is this; as long
as there is a living
female mammal, I won't knowingly and willingly engage
in homosexual practices.
Exceptions are: if it's Brad Pitt or Jesus, we may renegotiate;
I'll swap mole
rats for iguanas, or maybe a pretty bird. If it's down
to me and porcupines,
I'll go monastic.
Further exceptions may be made at any time without explanation,
in accordance
with SubGenius scriptures. Meanwhile, I really do enjoy
looking at pretty girls
and women, regardless of height, width, race, age or
availability status. I'm
contentedly married, and mostly harmless.