From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@home.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Mon, Jul 16, 2001 4:42 PM
Message-ID: <SkI47.23778$47.8238129@news2.rdc2.tx.home.com>
[Transcribed from paper notes written sometime Sunday
or possibly Monday,
July 8 or 9 2001]
Whooooooooooooooo X-Day!
This X-Day was... well, it was something else all right.
Slackalicious, you
might say.
When the Lord and I boarded the plane at the seething
DFW airport, we each
had different expectations of what we would find at
Brushwood, but neither
of us thought we would arrive to find a thriving SubGenius
community already
in place, complete with a city center, suburbs, and
a ghetto. And the
festival hadn't even "started" yet!
On my first loop around the campgrounds I was greeted
by so many SubGenii
that the trip took two hours. More miraculously still,
in alt.slack.woods,
the ghetto kids had upgraded. Even the poorest among
them had their own
fires! The leaders of the various ghetto tribes each
had spacious,
well-chosen campsites equipped with awnings and ample
seating.
Andrew the Impaled was one such leader, attracting many
followers awed by
his glass-walking, fire-eating, ass-kicking mojo.
My vote for best campsite had to go to the camp ruled
by a loose coalition
of IRC and alt.slack regulars including Ankara, Rev.
Dr. Jack, and FefNet
God Frank [GoRK's Friend Frank, for those of you playing
along with the home
version]. These yetis rose to dominate the woods through
their
venison-chili-making skills and their extremely thoughtful
creation of an
enormous white beacon that shone in the dark, guiding
all travelers in a
straight line past the pagans and the ditches right
into the heart of
alt.slack.woods.
I myself became lost in the darkness on my way back
from the bathrooms, but
I was saved by the Beacon of Slack!
Close by the IRC/alt.slack coalition camp was Phloighd's
Pool Table Camp.
The Lord Himself is a pool enthusiast, and he blessed
the table,
miraculously producing ten dollars from it, which he
promptly donated to
"Bob".
Overlooking all other camps in alt.slack.woods was the
secluded compound of
Dr. Dark. Surrounded by a fence and equipped with a
private, eco-friendly
composting toilet, Dr. Dark's camp loomed over the others
like the elaborate
castle of an insane genius billionaire.
The campsites of the along-the-strip aristocracy and
the field-dwelling
suburbanites were marked by a superabundance of food,
coffee, chairs, and
other necessities.
Generosity overflowed. Multiple campsites offered free
food, and I
personally witnessed several SubGenii actually walk
to their campsites to
procure liquor for those who had none.
Nothing demonstrates the generosity of the SubGenii
at XD4 more than the
Parable of the Vagrant. ... [To be posted separately,
since a lot of you
have probably already heard it and it goes on for three
pages.]
There were so many Slackful camps that on Thursday and
Friday nights the
forest rang with the haunting yowls of Yetis in heat
until long after
daybreak. There was a fur-lined Barbarella party, a
rave DJ'ed by the Lord
Himself, open mikes on the stage, kickin bands -- everything
you'd expect
from a high-class end-of-the-world gut-blowout party.
Because of this, the stay-up-all-night contest was not
held until Saturday
night, when, in the words of Raphael (seasonal camper,
naked drummer, and
coffeegod), "It seemed like black helicopters had
sprayed the campground
with Thorazine". Only Popess Lilith and Temujin
can be firmly counted as
contest winners. Carter Le Blanc also stayed up all
night, but looked
suspiciously like he had sneaked a nap in just before
the sun went down.
Prostata Canatata and Vagina Jones also stayed up all
night, but left the
campgrounds to go to the airport, thus disqualifying
themselves from the
contest.
Those SubGenii that slept seemed to enjoy it immensely,
appearing in the
morning with smiling faces and an urge for oobleck.
Although many SubGenii had to return to their Conspiracy
homes on Sunday,
those who stayed over were able to enjoy another full
day of "Bob"-O-Matic
fun. The Lord, assisted by the excellent chef Pater
Nostril, miraculously
transformed the leftover food of the SubGenii into a
feast that fed not only
all of our people, but also the Brushwood Staff -- with
leftovers to spare!
Then we got down to some serious oobleck action.
[End Transcript. That is all I wrote, but I'd like
to add that there were
at least four more awesome parties that Sunday night,
including Magdalen's
Hentai Party, Pater Nostril's Music Party, The Lord's
Poker Party, and Sikki
& Andreux's Fire Party. And, there were some other
people who stayed up all
night, wandering around shouting "Where are the
Yeti Babes!?!? but I don't
count them. Also, the oobleck was WAY WAY COOL, and
Rev. 808 is the ONLY
SubGenius that has it on VIDEO!! I'm talkin about naked
chicks covered in
white goo! Whooo!]
Original file name: MAGDALEN'S SEXXXXY XD4 REPORT!... - converted on Wednesday, 18 July 2001, 06:24
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