Stang's 4XD Preliminary Report

You know, if every day on Earth could be like an X-Day Drill at Brushwood, we wouldn't need X-Day!

As shocked as I and everybody else was that the Rupture has been delayed one more year (we're guessing), we were equally shocked at how Escape-Vessel-like we were able to make our OWN IMMEDIATE ENVIRONMENT once we stopped trying to FORCE Slack!

This X-Day Drill was the least organized, most Slackful, and possibly even the most lucrative, or at least the least expensive, of all the Drills we have survived so far. SOME may be disappointed that no one was injured, there was no bloodletting, the weather was good, not one preacher or band was lame, etc.; but NO ONE was disappointed at the truly unequaled consistency of the SLACK VIBE.

Previous Drills have had elements of tension which, while instructive and exciting, and violent and entertaining, necessarily required one or more victims. But this year featured an abundance of victimless Slack we never suspected was even possible on Earth Farm One. The PARTIES were good, the PREACHING was EXCELLENT throughout, the musical acts were of utmost Dobbsworthiness, and, above all, the LOLLYGAGGING was UNSURPASSED in its randomness, lack of direction and PURE ENJOYABILITY. Jesus did hardly a lick of work. I did hardly a lick of work. Magdalen and Nickie D sat around looking beautiful. Legume tended bar at Tranquility Bass. Practically the only EFFORT I saw put forth the whole weekend was Mojo's fruitless attempt to prove that he's really Pink and not a SubGenius. Actually Lilith and Modemac did "work" after a fashion, and certainly the preparation of things like Ed Strange's disco dome and the Quijibo geisha chamber required hours of craftsmanship, but I'm sure that too was a kind of pre-squirt "gleetish" Slack unto itself.

I am about to start copying and editing photos and sounds from my decks and Wei's, and the logs of that will turn into my detailed text report. In the meantime, I'll try to post everything to a.b.s. and SubSITE as it comes in. Anybody with CDs full of pictures or sound, or videotapes of the event, are sure as hell welcome to send copies to me at PO Box 181417, Cleve.Hts OH 44118. I have access to a DV camera and I can edit full res video on my computer now. Unfortunately my own camera and audio field recording gear is all still analog. But I ain't complaining.

The recordings that I got on my audio tape from the board are OKAY but not great. In some cases the video cameras may have captured better sound. Picking which "takes" are best is time consuming, but the Hour of Slack promises to be rerunless for a few weeks to come. (I also just acquired recordings of the Tucson and Amsterdam devivals, and, we have Starwood coming up in 10 days! The Word Will Flow!!)

I don't even want to attempt to list all the great performances and sudden explosions of unpredictability that happened at 4XD, yet. For now let me say that even my jaded ear heard NOTHING LAME coming from the stage, just the opposite in fact, and my yakkings and natterings with my fellow SubGenii were uniformly Slack-inducing. I never once felt vampirized or vampirizing. All the new people I met seemed real "cool" as the youth say. Maybe it's just me and the fact that my general attitude has improved, now that I am permanent consort to an actual Space Goddess. Maybe it's that the Overman, Philo Drummond, the World's Greatest Rewardian, AND his brother Sphinx, The Good Drummond Brother, were there. They actually knew "Bob" in college, so that's like having REAL Apostles around, even if they were troublemaking drunks every night, making crop circles by spinning out in that rented car on Amish farmland. But I swear, it seemed like the whole extended weekend was an oobleck-like spew of pure Slackdomness. Even when the countdown happened at 7 am and nothing ensued, that itself was Slack.

When the Arisal remained nigh and no saucers appeared, I thought to myself, "Oh well, but at least I have cable modem now, and tht new software to experiment with when I get home!" My glass has definitely reached the half full mark. I feel like I've been topped off, even if we have to wait another year for X-Day.

Also... I am not SURE of this, but I SUSPECT that a lot more hungry freaks and lonesome mutants "scored" this time around.

Which reminds me -- Chris Li, you better watch your back from now on. I got your number. Oh yeah. I got a bead on your lecherous ass, my boy. See, you don't know me, see. You don't know who you are dealing with. I know what you been at. I got friends, they tell me things, see. You are a marked man, my friend. I don't practice what I preach, see. You don't know. I go it covered, see. I ain't falling for your fortune cookie shit, my man. "You have nothing to lose" my ass. You are playing games, my good friend, but this game is serious. I will see you when you least expect it. But you will not see me. Your last words will be, "Say... do you smell something Stangy?" I know all, see all, hear all. You just watch your ass. And then wash it. Cause I am going to kick it. You and your gang they be go down my friend.

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From: md_archangel@hotmail.com (mykal d'archangel)

I will most likely see Dr Li this week-end and am available for a
"contract".

st m d'a
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Subject: Re: 4XD Preliminary Report
From: Christopher Lee <clbundy@indy.net>
Date: Mon, Jul 9, 2001 11:57 PM

I honestly don't know what I did to offend... ? Is this about that bottle
of fruit juice I gave you Friday night? I swear, I had nothing to do with
that. It was given to me, but I decided I wanted a gatorade/beer cocktail
instead, and thought someone should get some good out of it.... but I
don't think that was what set you off.

I mean, I'm such a mild-mannered, likable, personable young man, without a
deceitful treacherous bone in my body... and Stang doesn't have the
reputation that some other preachers have, as being quick to anger... what
could *I* have done to honk him off?!? Boy, it must have been quite a
transgression though.

I'm not scared though. Shee-it, Stang probably don't even remember where I
live.
______________________________________
Rev. Christopher Lee, Clan Quijibo
Church of Homer Simpson, Boddhisattva

To obtain Quijibo for use in the home,
send $$$ to:
18 W. Main, Suite X
Greenfield, IN 46140
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Subject: Re: 4XD Preliminary Report
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Tue, Jul 10, 2001 1:10 PM
Message-ID: <100720011310431942%stang@subgenius.com>

In article <3B4A7D3F.C658272D@indy.net>, Christopher Lee
<clbundy@indy.net> wrote:

>
> I honestly don't know what I did to offend... ? Is this about that bottle
> of fruit juice I gave you Friday night? I swear, I had nothing to do with
> that. It was given to me, but I decided I wanted a gatorade/beer cocktail
> instead, and thought someone should get some good out of it.... but I
> don't think that was what set you off.

Fruit Juice my ass. I saw where your eyes were wandering during that
ShorDurMarriage I performed. I saw which Space Princess you were trying
to bird dog. I SEEN you. More than that, I WHIFFREAD your evil evil
thoughts.

>
> I'm not scared though. Shee-it, Stang probably don't even remember where I
> live.
>
> Rev. Christopher Lee, Clan Quijibo
> 18 W. Main, Suite X
> Greenfield, IN 46140

It's true, I have no clue to your location, but I will find it, you
will see, my man. Soon you will see.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected