From: Pisces <KVanHall@gmail.com>
That one guy was an asshole.
Someone was killed.
I was permanently scarred and forever changed.
Bands rocked.
Someone forgot to show up
Popeblack was right.
Two people got glowsticks up their rectums.
Shit got blown up.
People got blown up.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Xday Report
From: "nu-monet v10.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Lessons learned:
You can't have too much altar drainage.
There are practical limits to how many bologna
and ketchup sammiches you can eat at once.
Some don't like having their rectal foreign
body collection scrutinized.
Pokemon is just a cartoon. A CARTOON.
Reverend Stang will not shoot electricity from
his fingertips on request unless you ask nice.
"Consarnation" is a killing word. Let's just
keep this one under our hats, shall we?
Green is not a flavor.
--
2008 is the SubGenius YEAR OF THE ZOOB!
Be Sure To Visit the 'SubGenius Reverend' Blog:
http://slackoff.blogspot.com/
***********
"I can imagine a LOT when it comes
to unimaginable power."
-- nu-monet
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Xday Report
From: "nu-monet v10.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Rev. Ivan Stang wrote:
>
>
> WELCOME, Version 10!
You should be the Yetisyny to ask.
Which is preferable, that the Church continue to
encourage stubborn Remainer SubGenii to quit their
jobs and Slack off, or should they all just be
killed outright and their souls collected for "Bob"
in the storage facility?
They are much less mess and fuss this way.
And they are obviously not purifying their genomes
enough to be permitted on the ships. That is,
listening to their sacred scribe and actually DOING
what he and the other Hierarchs say.
According to the records left by 9, the average time
spent in excremeditation is actually getting shorter,
and a significant percentage of SubGenii are even
planning to vote for CONspiracy candidates in those
election things.
Increasing numbers are even refraining from sacred sex
in favor of copulating with humans.
If they fall away from "Bob" much further,
my iterations
are just going to lock themselves up in the cave and
let the remaining Remainers go to some other vault,
maybe the Scienos or the Mormons.
It would serve them right.
--
2008 is the SubGenius YEAR OF THE ZOOB!
Be Sure To Visit the 'SubGenius Reverend' Blog:
http://slackoff.blogspot.com/
***********
"This hedgehog will live with us!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Xday Report
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
On Jul 9, 12:42 pm, Pisces <KVanH...@gmail.com>
wrote:
> That one guy was an asshole.
> Someone was killed.
> I was permanently scarred and forever changed.
> Bands rocked.
> Someone forgot to show up
> Popeblack was right.
> Two people got glowsticks up their rectums.
> Shit got blown up.
> People got blown up.
Welcome to Stangdom!
Many are devivors. But of X-Dayvors, there are few,
and you have now
joined our august if raggedy-edged assemblage.
Because of Pisces, and many other formally-volunteering
volunteers,
but mainly Pisces (and Modemac), I HAD FUN THIS WHOLE
X-DAY! That is
really a first. I didn't have a single nervous breakdown.
Pisces took
the bullet for me. She did a FABULOUS job. Also, of
all the X-Day
"Stangs," she is by far the prettiest. Modemac
has always been a Sex
God at X-Day, but for the first time we had an honest-to-Gobbs
Sex
Goddess servicing EVERYBODY, whether everybody knew
it or not.
Now that she has freed me from the Lamp, she will be
the Genie until
she can con some other dumb sucker into taking the job.
AHAHAHAHA!!! FREE! I'm FREEEEEEEEEE!
Well, I will be after I edit these 1,000 stills, 14
hours of video and
20 hours of audio. I guess that starts now. I just dropped
off Dok
Frop and Sister Decadence at the airport, and now my
first "normal"
post-X-Day day has begun. The SubG class is over, and
Starwood is 2
weeks away.
I only have two jobs at Starwood -- ranting for one
hour, and helping
Princess Wei run Registration. The latter just HAPPENS
to mean that
the person who controls the registration DATA per se,
the computer
geek who keeps the registration system running, is me.
In other words,
the real names, addresses, and credit card numbers of
everyone who
enters Brushwood during Starwood are all in the hands
of Rev. Ivan
Stang, Goddess-mocking, astrology-debunking, ESP-denying,
UFO-
doubting, acutely nonspiritual Secular Humanist SubGenius.
I am the
only one on site who knows where the "export"
button is in the special
registration computer program (which was itself made
by a former
SubGenius Pope of Berea). Heh.
Until that time I guess I shall wade through pics n'
porns n' noises.
I will first be putting them on alt.binaries.slack and
(for big files)
a.b.m.s., where nobody under 50 can get to them (Usenet
binaries
nowadays being akin to ham radio), but eventually I
will probably
slather it all all over SubSITE and The Hour of Slack.
And you will see that the stories being told of X-Day
11 are not
necessarily all lies. The craziest stories are in fact
the truest.
P.S. I was not one of the people with glowsticks up the ass.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Xday Report
From: Zapanaz <http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl>
Sister Decadence hunched over a computer, typing feverishly;
Thunder crashed, Sister Decadence laughed madly, then
wrote:
>On Wed, 09 Jul 2008 20:51:53 -0700, Zapanaz
><http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:
>
>>Rev. Ivan Stang hunched over a computer, typing
feverishly;
>>Thunder crashed, Rev. Ivan Stang laughed madly,
then wrote:
>>
>>>On Jul 9, 9:40 pm, "Rev. Back It On
Up 13" <eviel...@aol.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>>
>>>> But thank you, Pisces, for once again
being the voice of reason.
>>>> Stang, I take back what I said about
what you should go and do to
>>>> yourself. As a gesture of forgiveness,
please accept these 30 pounds
>>>> of chicken parmagiana.
>>>
>>>You will be bored to know that last night
We/I took Dok Frop and Sis D
>>>to Littal Italy for dinner at an authentic
non-chain Clevelandian
>>>Italian restaurant, Mama Santos or something,
where I did order
>>>chicken parmigiana. If only I had known
YOU had provided it, I
>>>wouldn't have let them charge me that $12
for it. And I only ate like
>>>15 pounds. Damn.
>>>
>>>
>>
>>honestly ... how can you hang around Sister
Decadence without looking
>>at her and your IQ drops 50 points and then
you start drooling and
>>talking like a monkey?
>>
>>
>>You have something which I do not.
>>
>>
>>
>>***
>>
>>
>>reading that, I think there is a 32.5 percent
chance it will read the
>>wrong way.
>
>
>You never once drooled, that I noticed. You were
kind & charming.
I'm a drool ventriloquist, I made the guy off to my left drool.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
Why do I suddenly envisualize a group of abominable
snowmen with
yarmulkes at a Bar mitzvah?