Subject: I feel Pink now...

From: Popess Pantiara Evokovitch <pantiara@gmail.com>

Mostly because I'm a bright bubblegum pink from all the sun at
Brushwood. Mostly on my forearms and the top of my feet, which are
also covered in mosquito bites. Ow. It will eventually peel and turn
into freckles. No tan for me. At least I had the werwithall to not let
my boobs get too much sun. Absolutely nothing worse than burned
nipples except maybe a burned pecker.

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Subject: Re: I feel Pink now...
From: "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@sssssubgenius.com>

Popess Pantiara is nearly an albino like me. We can stand next to a
nightlite with a 7 W bulb and get a peeling burn.

Sunscreen works but then leaves your skin sworled, like strawberry ice cream
melted on it. That's when you don't put the stuff on 100% evanly.
Actually, any variatian in the covarage acts like the negative in a film.
Spooky shit.

The best thing to do for skin like that is stay INSIDE where it's safe.

I've got one pink arm and one white one today. That's from driving in
the...what do they call that...yes..."SUN". Here in Cleveland, that's just
a concept.

[*]
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From: "Rev. Back It On Up 13" <evielust@aol.com>

My first X-Day in 2002 was a big head tragedy.

I failed to shield my enormous melon against sun. Due to the unusual
shape of my girthy dome, I ended up with horizontal read stripe half
way down my forehead and a vertical one sloping straight down my nose.

I didn't take many pictures that year, but I have two of sifu and me
together and I look like a big blazing T-zone being projected onto a
giant white balloon.

It turns out "Bob" has no sympathy for the unprepared, even if Rev.
Egg Plant does.

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

On Jul 9, 2:28 pm, just john <teuy13...@sneakemail.com> wrote:
>
> Thanks for mentioning the mosquito bites.
>
> Now I feel a lot less bad about missing it.

My wife insisted that I put her hippie bug repellent on me. I sneakily
put it on my hands only. My hands are the only places I got any bug-
bites.

We/I have been walking and, when possible, even hiking, outdoors, so
as not to look like most people our age, and therefore the sun did
nothing it hasn't been doing for a long time to me -- that is, making
me slightly balder by the day.

Wearing a hat helps a lot, too.

In previous years, Professor Pressure has been known to paint or
stencil a Dobbshead on his belly with sunblock, or maybe it was the
other way around, but he ended up with a tanned-on Dobbshead or
perhaps a Negative Dobbshead.

One young lady, Rev. Angie, had lost her Membership card and couldn't
PROVE she was a Member, so I demanded she show me THE SCAR or else pay
the extra $30 for Membership. Just as I suspect of all True SubGenii,
she did indeed bear an Initiation Scar, this one in the form of a Clip-
Art Penguin TATTOO on her ankle, from an illo by Palmer or Hal from
Revelation X.

(Secretly, I recognized her from previous years, since she is
breathtakingly gorgeous, and all that I.D.-checking was a put-on.)

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Subject: Re: I feel Pink now...
From: "Rev. Back It On Up 13" <evielust@aol.com>

I remember that. She was a cutie indeed. I can't bring myself to get
any such brandings on myself, but hopefully you'll recognize me at
future drills.

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

We'll just measure your skull.

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From: "Rev. Back It On Up 13" <evielust@aol.com>

You know, I think that part of the general gist of this bozo so called
"church" is for us to get over our hangups being as we paid members
are of the perfect race of whatever we are. At least that's the
impression I got from all the nudes I saw last week and the overall
attitude of personal excellence in spite of overwhelming social
perceptions pointing to the contrary! And I believe in that! We're
all about as good looking and appealing as we're ever going to be
again, unless, like Chas, we are reconstructed with a new improved
form after we shuffle off the mortal what have you.

YOU, however, seem to have targeted MY PERSONAL HEAD, over the size of
which I had no control whatsoever, with your scorn. Therefore, I
demand a head measurement contest in 2009 (the real 1998) before the
saucers put an end to this nonsense once and for all.

I will bet your head is even bigger than mine is, my good man. I will
bet you $1. If I lose, I will show you the picture of me as a baby
with my gumby knobs on my head because my pure subgenius parents
forgot to rotate me.


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