X-Day
From: ghsst6+@pitt.edu (Geoffrey H Spear)
ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au (Mitchell Porter) wrote:
>What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
are you saying that the teachings of "Bob" are not true, you goat roping,
ham bleeding, pitlicking Pink Boy?
have faith! the saucers *will* come, and only "Bob" can save most of
us. of course, as you've already proven your lack of faith here,
you'll probably be left among the Normals in Hell on Earth.
--
Geoff Spear |"And whenever rn sees your .signature
ghsst6+@pitt.edu | it'll rmgroup alt.slack as well! Yay!"
http://www.pitt.edu/~ghsst6/ | - Kibo
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: "Brian D. Bisson" <bdb@shadow.net>
ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au (Mitchell Porter) wrote:
> What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
1) You won't notice when they do, only a few thousand of us get to
leave this nasty rock.
2) The media machine we leave behind will just invent more lies to
keep you asking questions.
3) "You know how dumb the average person is? By definition, HALF of
them are dumber than THAT!"
Doktor BDB
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: camangin@unity.ncsu.edu (Charles Albert Mangin)
>>What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
Well, mitch, if you've paid your 20/30 dollars to the folx in dallas <they
won't be, if the saucers fail to come, as you'll see momentarily> then you
may be entitled to 60 or 90 dollars compensation, as you have sent in your
money under the premise that the saucers ARE your eternal salvation, and
under the premise that you'd get 'eternal salvation or triple your money
back.
so if the saucers are late, stang's gonna be up to his third eye in pittling
$60 and $90 lawsuits.
funfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfunfununfunfunfun
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: wbarwell@Starbase.NeoSoft.COM (William Barwell)
Mitchell Porter <ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au> wrote:
>What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
5000 letters to Dallas demanding that triple money back guarantee refund.
Plus at least 2000 death threats on alt.slack and a class action suit.
Pope Charles
SubGenius Pope Of Houston
Slack!
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: spl@szechuan.ucsd.edu (Steve Lamont)
John Searcy <jsearcy@delphi.com> writes:
>But come on! Of course the Xists are going to arrive on X-Day. Where's your
>faith? heh heh heh
In my checkbook.
spl
--
Steve Lamont, SciViGuy -- (619) 534-7968 -- spl@szechuan.ucsd.edu
San Diego Microscopy and Imaging Resource/UC San Diego/La Jolla, CA 92093-0608
The US has a single payer health care system: through the nose.
- H. Davis
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: i.stang@metronet.com (Rev. Ivan Stang)
ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au (Mitchell Porter) wrote:
>What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
(followed by a whole mess of pure speculation and slander on the part of
Great SubMen who should've done their homework better))
I refer you to REVELATION X, bottom of page 13, top of page 14.
Seems to me like we've got it COVERED.
"Eternal Salvation" doesn't come with the EARTHLY paradise on the Escape
Vessels, you BLIND HOGS ROOTING FOR ACORNS!! That's the SUBGENIUS HELL
(and beyond) PART!! You have to "DIE" in Dobbs and THEN have him cheat you
before you get your $90.
But you will get your $90, if that happens. WE PROMISE! WE SWEAR ON THE
SKELETON OF JANE DOBBS!!
--
Send $1 for free information. PRABOB
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: i.stang@metronet.com (Rev. Ivan Stang)
sbjohnston@aol.com (SBJohnston) wrote:
> Rev Stang wrote...
>
> >WE SWEAR ON THE SKELETON OF JANE DOBBS!!
>
> Was she a brown-haired girl, by any chance??
>
"We dug her up and fucked her. We fucked her skeleton."
-- The Tube Bar Caller
"I fucked an ol' gal by the graveyard.
God damn her poor soul, she was dead.
The maggots crawled out of her nostrils,
And the hair slid off of her head.
But after I'd finished my business,
I knew I'd committed a sin.
And so from my pocket I drew out a straw
And sucked out the load I'd shot in."
(Trad.)
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: pdrummond@subg.com
ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au (Mitchell Porter) wrote:
>What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
If that happens, then its because "Bob" finally closed the biggest deal
of his life, and we'll have to wait until December.
MC Phila "D"
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: pdrummond@subg.com
<wbarwell@Starbase.NeoSoft.COM> writes:
> Mitchell Porter <ma157727@dingo.cc.uq.oz.au> wrote:
>
> >What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
> >
> 5000 letters to Dallas demanding that triple money back guarantee refund.
> Plus at least 2000 death threats on alt.slack and a class action suit.
Hey, all we guaranteed was eternal salvation or triple you money back. Those
5000 will have to kill themselves first if they want us to believe that they
have not received it. And even then we're only liable for the $1.00 (times 3)
that they invested in the pamphlet. However, its more than likely their mail
will be returned unopened.
Regretfully and with fervor,
Massive Phallus Drum
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: "Brian D. Bisson" <bdb@shadow.net>
i.stang@metronet.com (Rev. Ivan Stang) wrote:
> (followed by a whole mess of pure speculation and slander on the part of
> Great SubMen who should've done their homework better))
What, you think that we BELIEVE everything we read? You think this is
TV or something? Creating our own :excuses: for things is what sets
us apart from "THEM"! They use the same old tired, lack-luster
excuses over and over, like "I was a victim" (q.v. another thread),
yet the SubPeePole, we just make up another "lie" and sell it back!
Dogma is great, when you undermine it.
Doktor BDB
(not a drop of caffeine today)
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: Sternodox <glatter@delphi.com>
These fucking PINKS. Crassly assuming Dobbs even has the vaguest CONCEPT
of THEIR calendar - sorta makes us REAL Doktors "pee snidely in our own
damn asses" don't it? Of course, July 5, 1998 is the date . . . but not
THAT date, not the one actualized as a "literal" snare for the "gimme-"Bob"s
It really cracks me up that this is even in DEBATE. Just shows you
how much "Frop" there AIN'T. Christ On A Crutch, bubbas, worry about
THE BONE before you worry about your sorry asses come X-Day (unless yer
paid in fulsome). If you can't follow a SIMPLE Prescripture, why in
Dobbs name do you even think you'll be allowed in the accounting
deportment? God DAMN, man ... these PNKZ are ALREADY frying. They've
pre-Ruptured and G'BroagFran hasn't said ONE WORD here yet. Flyin'
high and whitey, if you ask ME. But, we're Doktors ... what are we
even bothering for? Gimme that 'fropstick Philo, we got some BUTTS
to split!
Yours in Fuck,
Rev. Spermodox
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Subject: xday
From: podex@access.mountain.net (Jeff Johnston)
> What happens when X-Day comes and goes, and the saucers haven't shown?
Why you communist heathen. You had best sound off that you love Dobbs
and believe in his plan to save us!
WOAH THERE BOY! guess I've seen Full Metal Jacket one too many times.
Reminds me of the time grandpa left his false teeth in town and coulden't
get the foil of the rubber. hehehe. Had a brother in law worked at the
rubber foil pack factory when it closed down in '78 or was it in 87?
never could remember dates. . . except that one with the stripper the boys
in the voluenteer fire department got for my birhday in 88 or was it 88?
I don't know... we'll probably be angry at the xsists for a while but
then i'll start drinking again and forget that the god damn spacemen were
even supposed to show in the first place. Judgement day has been lurking
just around the corner like a $3 pimp for almost 2000 years and just look
at the money the Christians have leeched off that fucker. If judgement
day happened today they would be as broke as those people in Des Moines I
read about in the star that sunk all their money into riverboat anal sex
bingo games. Maybe an Xday blowout is just what the Sub G church needs
to push it over the top.
Pope Podex
Pope of all west Virginia. Cake launcher, healer and moonshine connection
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Subject: Re: X-Day
From: cuthulu@unicomp.net (Kevan Smith)
In article <3gkhv0$7q7@usenet.srv.cis.pitt.edu>, ghsst6+@pitt.edu says...
>have faith! the saucers *will* come, and only "Bob" can save most of
>us. of course, as you've already proven your lack of faith here,
>you'll probably be left among the Normals in Hell on Earth.
"Bob" my third ass!! He's out cuttin' a deal for his own dead carcass.
He's merely made it easier for the X's to recognize our Yeti Heritage, and
it's up to your own slobbering skull to pull yourself aboard the saucers.
Anyway, a far greater terror we await is the imminent doom the earth faces
at the bladed hands of the Yacatisma. They are whom the X-ists will save us
from.
But enough parroting.
Give me your slack or kill me.
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