The Cure For Depression

From: HellPope Huey X <radiopopeNOraSPAM@hotmail.com.invalid>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Mon, Jul 17, 2000 9:07 PM
Message-ID: <1bb3ebc1.9ca0301f@usw-ex0106-047.remarq.com>

The Cure for Chronic Semi-Manic Clinical Depression With A Heavy
Down Cycle Period and Bouquet of Personality Disorders:

1) Endless therapy with assholes who'd just as soon see you leap
headfirst from water tower onto the windshield of an SUV anyway;

2) Multiple rounds with wonder drugs that not only don't work
but have shitty side effects and are as expensive as fuck-all;

3) frop, if you can land it even HALF as often as needed;

4) 2 blowjobs a day, if possible;

5) Grinding perseverance against all odds;

6) Send $30 to "BOB" for those random blasts of fresh Church
air;

7) DEATH, at which point you can cuss Old Man God and say "What
the fuck was all THAT for and where the fuckin' fuck were YOU
when Fluffy got run over!!??" and then He sends you into the Pit
for a rectal waltz with Cthulu and then you get reincarnated for
another damned round of it.

Any suggestions? No, not that one, I'm no longer limber enough.

HellPope Huey,
My nipples are KILLIN' me for some reason

Aliens, frop and titties galore, Rants that raise the roof! All
roads lead straight back to "Bob" and I'm the livin' proof!
JeHoVaH-1 and Nhee Ghee can suck me 'til they POP! I live by the
law of "do as thou wilt" and I ain't NEVER gonna stop! Some
people would say that I'm outta my mind for boogie'n to a spoof;
but its better than havin' my head on a pike in the name of THEIR
view of the Truth! Straddlin' a line 'tweenst a stiffy and Death,
Good LAWD, "Bob" knows I'm a GREAT big mess! But I paid $30, got
my Sex Goddess and -you know the rest!-
EIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEI$
30$30$30$30$30

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Original file name: The Cure For Depression - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:32