Dear SubGenius Answer Yeti

From: joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com (Joe Cosby)
Subject: Dear Subgenius Answer Yeti
Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 09:17:58 GMT

They're always telling me stuff like

"Make your dreams come true!"

"You must have HOPES and DREAMS"

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act but also DREAM, not
only DREAM but also believe"

The thing is, most of my dreams are about naked rednecks trying to
overcharge me for my power bill, evil psychic albinos who can kill
cops with candles, women in leather thongs, forgetting to wear
underwear, restaurants in treehouses, and stuff like that.

Somehow I'm not sure I get it.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

Zocar! Zamram!

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From: iDRMRSR <alex.i.thymia@depression.org>

Jeez, man, the answer is right under yer HOOKNOSE!

Those ARE yer hopes, and dreams, and you believe that you dreamed them.

Nobody said it was all supposed to come together and make sense.

You can now check off one in every category, Hope, Dream, Belief.

Now get to bed, you wastrel. It's past 1 am your time. I need no
excuse because I'm prolly twice yer age.

Hey, just tryin ta make you feel at home ;-)

[*]
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From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
>
> The thing is, most of my dreams are about naked rednecks
> trying to overcharge me for my power bill,

This means that you are going to carefully stage an *accident*
which will result in the death and disfigurement of several
of your enemies. Your DREAM was a signal that all is in place,
ready to go, just awaiting that unconscious act of commission
or omission. But *you* have to make your dreams come true!

> evil psychic albinos who can kill
> cops with candles,

This means that *becoming* an evil psychic albino is the apex
of your potential. You must HOPE and DREAM about this, for
it is your DESTINY.

> women in leather thongs, forgetting to wear
> underwear, restaurants in treehouses, and stuff like that.

You must DREAM all this into reality. You must also believe
that it all makes sense in an illegal, weird, cosmic sort of
way, and that you have NO CHOICE but to make tangible.

>
> Somehow I'm not sure I get it.
>

Whatever you do, if you are dreaming that you are falling,
you MUST wake up before you hit the ground. Otherwise, you
are latently gay and will end up going down on winos in
bus terminals.

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From: CmarkB <c-bee1@staff.uiuc.edu>

Go west, young man. To Hollywood, and get into producer school.

And when you're the next Aaron Spelling, remember the Church.

And forget about the naked rednecks. For me.

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Original file name: Dear Subgenius Answer Yeti - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:34