An Outsider Asks

From: "John Leonard" <remove_for _spamjohn.leonard@wwc.com>
Date: Sat, 3 Mar 2001 21:59:48 -0500

Just exactly what is a 'sub-genius'? What, for that matter, is a
'genius'? And what are the relationships between sub-genii, genii, aliens,
and humans?

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From: "Rev. Svlad" <louis@uhoh-boom.com>

A SubGenius is a brand of toilet paper. Well, at least the
BOOK of the SubGenius can be if in an extremely desparate
situation or if you're a Discordian (in which case BURN
EVERY R.A.W. BOOK YOU OWN... nothing against RAW, but the
Discordians nowadays are getting damned boring. And sure, so
are the "SubGenii", but that's okay because I'M right)
I don't care much about Geniuses/Genii beyond some curious
jabs and pokes.
ALIENS?! YOU WANT ME TO TALK ABOUT ALIENS? I'll TELL YOU
ABOUT ALIENS. Or I probably WON'T. I've been channeling a
BIT TOO MANY of the wee beasties today and quite frankly I'm
ALL OUT. I can tell you, boy, you don't WANNA know about
ALIENS. ESPECIALLY NOT the SubGenii's relationship to them.
And humans? A human is a type of pork.
shhhhhh
Don't listen to these people about "Bob". "Bob's" a piece of
clipart become a man. You'll REALLY want to worship Nhee
Ghee and praise the Yacatisma, because "Bob" and the damned
Xists aren't coming until 8661. Anybody who says otherwise
just makes me have to state it again.
And watch out for those Zists.
Oh, hell with it. "Bob" exists. I don't care if that
contradicts what I just said. I've got mood swings, so screw
that.
I suggest you send $1 to the SubGenius Foundation, Inc., PO
Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214. It's the damned FAQ... of a
sort.

- Rev. Svlad (Last name deleted due to security reasons)

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From: joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com (Joe Cosby)

We're the sub-organization within the global masonic illuminati klum
church of scientology conspiracy responsible for manufacturing
mind-control implants.
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

after a few drinks, when you feel all saturnine, your mind brings up
strange thoughts
- Rienk Doetjes

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From: joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com (Joe Cosby)

btw we're still waiting for you to complete your warranty and survey,
sir.
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

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From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

SubGenii be de meanie' wid de greediest of penii.
A genius of a penis ain't not all dat come between us.
Simoleans for aliens to ship our ass' to Venus.
The Djinn dat make de humin al'as askin' fo' fo'giveness.
But none be comin'.

Jes thirty dollahs to Rev'rend Stang
Is all "Bob" askin' you.
Les'n he forsake, 'n' you shake 'n' bake
'n' piss yer dick off. 'Nuff said.

--
"Violence in the pursuit of Greed is no Sin."

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From: "Boddhisatva Troutwaxer" <tungtung@pacbell.net>

We are the only Church on Earth currently licensed to buy, rent, sell, or
lease human souls.

> What, for that matter, is a
> 'genius'?

You are a genius, for you have asked the right questions, and therefore
can become enSlackened. You probably had slack once, before the
conspiracy took it away.

> And what are the relationships between sub-genii, genii, aliens, and
> humans?

SubGenii keep the souls of humans and sell said same souls to the aliens.
Humans are bad little creatures descended from shit throwing monkeys.
SubGenii are good, wise, sexy beings descended from enlightened yetis.
We hate everything but slack, 'frop, music and good sex. Praise "Bob"

The aliens are giant fungi who eat human souls and want to enslave us all.
We worship them because JHVH-1 will kill us if we do not do his will.

God is an alien and still threatens this planet.

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From: subspecies23@aol.com (Sub-Species No.23)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: 04 Mar 2001 09:42:54 GMT
Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com
Subject: Kennedy Conspiracy Junk
Message-ID: <20010304044254.23785.00000412@ng-cn1.aol.com>
Xref: spln alt.slack:227909

You've probably all seen those lists of strange similarities between the
Lincoln and Kennedy assasinations (both killers names have the same amount of
letters, etc etc...). Well, the other day I thought of one that isnt on any of
the lists I've seen:
Lincoln was shot in the Ford Theater, Kennedy was shot in a Ford Lincoln.

This too makes my brain hurt.

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Original file name: An outsider asks. - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:34