[[[
Hi folks! I turned my scanner and OCR software loose on an
English translation of the book _THE EXHORTATION TO PHILOSOPHY_
by the Neoplatonist philosopher Iamblichus (ca. 250-325 A.D.)
Sure, I reposted the nun jokes from za.humour and the text of
a sadistic personal protection device patent. And yes, this is
something I found in a book. Ok, so I'm not writing anything
original. But, this -- yes, this -- seems appropriate to
alt.slack and even the other newsgroups above. It *is* about
religion after all. (of course the nun jokes could be considered
religious...)
Now as to the Church of the SubGenius, we've got a lot of symbols
of one form or another that appear ridiculous and inane. But
that's because the CotSG is a Mystery Cult and you have to be
an initiate to know the true meaning of the symbols. And you
*can* be one for the low low price of $30! Actually, the $1 Church
Pamphlets are a good start. Buy either _Book_ _of_ _the_ _SubGenius_
or _Revelation-X_, the _"Bob"acryphon_ for even better results.
]]]
For the most ancient thinkers, and those who were contemporary
with and disciples of Pythagoras himself, did not compose
their writings in a common and popular stye, and in a manner usual
with all other writers, intelligible and easy to be understood off-
hand, as if they were attempting to make their conceptions easy of
apprehension, but, in accordance with the silence about the
Mysteries, prescribed by Pythagoras as a law, they used modes
recondite and unintelligible to the uninitiated, and concealed from
others through symbols their thoughts and discourses. And therefore
unless one who apprehends these symbols unfolds their meaning
by a lucid interpretation they will seem to those who may meet
with them to be ridiculous and inane, and full of nugacity and
garrulity [but, being rightly explained, and instead of dark made
obvious and clear even to the multitude, then they will be found
analogous to prophetic sayings, and to the oracles of the Pythian
Apollo. They will then also disclose an admirable meaning, and will
produce a divine inspiration in those who unite intellect with
erudition].
In order therefore that the great utility of these symbols may be
known, and their exhortative use may be manifest, we will give the
solution or interpretation of every symbol, according to both the
exoteric and oral modes of transmission, not omitting those things
which were preserved in silence and not communicated to the
uninitiated.
The following are the Symbols which will be elucidated:
1. Entering a temple worship, meanwhile neither say nor do
anything which pertains to ordinary life.
2. Enter not into a temple negligently, nor, in brief, adore
carelessly, not even though you should stand at the very doors
themselves.
3. Sacrifice and adore unshod.
4. Disbelieve nothing amazing concerning the Gods or divine
dogmas.
5. Leaving the public ways, walk in unfrequented paths.
6. Abstain from Melanurus, for it belongs to the terrestrial Gods.
7. Above all things, govern your tongue when you follow the Gods.
8. When the winds blow, worship the sound.
9. Cut not fire with a sword.
10. Turn away from yourself every sharp edge.
11. Help a man to take up a burden, but not to lay it down.
12. Put the shoe on the right foot first, but put the left foot first
into the bath tub.
13. Speak not about Pythagoric concerns without light.
14. Pass not over a pair of scales. [Do not step above the beam of
the balance].
15. Traveling from home turn not back, for the Furies will go back
with you.
16. Do not urinate facing the sun.
17. Clean not a seat with a torch.
18. Nourish a cock, but do not sacrifice it, for it is sacred to the sun
and the moon.
19. Do not sit upon a choenix [bushel].
20. Nourish nothing which has crooked talons or nails.
21. Cut not in the way.
22 Do not rereive a swallow into your house.
23. Do not wear a ring.
24. Inscribe not the image of God on a ring.
25. Look not in a mirror by lamp-light.
26. Do not indulge in immoderate laughter.
27. Do not pare your nails while sacrificing.
28. Do not readily seize everyone with your right hand.
29. When you rise from bed disorder the covering, and efface the
impression of the body.
30. Eat not the heart.
31. Eat not the brain.
32. Spit upon the cuttings of your hair and the parings of you:
nails.
33. Do not receive the fish Erythrinus.
34. Destroy the print of a pot in the ashes.
35. Draw not near to that which has gold, in order to produce
children.
36. Honor more a figure and step than a figure and three obols
37. Abstain from beans.
38. Transplant mallows in your garden, but eat them not.
39. Abstain from the use of living creatures.
All these symbols are in general exhortative to all virtue; and
each of them in particular leads to some particular virtue. And to
parts of Philosophy and disciplinary learning different symbols are
differently adapted as, for instance, the first are directly exhortative
to piety and divine science.
[
Iamblichus goes on to explain the meaning of each of the 39 rules.
I include the following because it was at the bottom of the page
and if you are so inclined, you can go to a *big* library and find
the book and read the rest for yourself. His interpretations
are not remarkable. Don't cut fire with a sword means don't
argue with an angry man for instance. Help a man take up a burden...
means help him get started but don't help him stop. And people
really did take their shoes off before praying.
]
Symbol 1
This, entering a temple worship, meanwhile neither say nor do
anything which pertains to ordinary life, signifies that one should
preserve the divine as in and of itself, unmingled and undefiled
uniting the pure to the pure, and taking care lest anything of
human affairs intrudes itself into the divine worship: for all these
things are totally alien and antagonistic to it. Moreover, this
conduces much to the acquisition of science: for to the divine science
should be brought no such thing as human opinion or care of the
external life. Nothing else therefore is commanded by this precept
than that divine discourses and sacred actions should not be
[[[ tape runs out ]]]
....................TEAR.ALONG.THE.DOTTED.LINE.....................
Epopt of the Exploding Head of JFK. Lincesed to blaspheme the Gods
My skull is bigger on the inside than the outside!
Send $1 to SubGenius Foundation, P.O. Box 140306, Dallas TX 75214
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Original file name: Those Nutty Pythagoreans
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