: MINDWALK is one of the sacred films of Master Control, if only
:for the fact that there are NO EXPLOSIONS in it. Get this, it's people
:TALKING about things. Like, IDEAS and stuff, man. They walk around and
:TALK about ideas. Yeah, I know it's not Mystery Science Theater 3000.
:That's why it's good. It's not snide droops MOCKING SOMETHING, it's not
:giant meatmen hollering YAAAAAAH, as they leap through explosions with a
:huge gun in each hand going blam blam blam, it's not even giant
:spaceships making huge grinding noises whenever they move, it's just
:really amazing ideas presented in conversation among three different
:people walking around the medieval cathedral/island town of Mont St.
:Michel.
Unfortunately, it's easier to be the critic and to be the one who
points out the errors and the problems and the flaws. Of course,
it's also easy to be the visionary of a better world. Like,
"Gosh folks, can't we get along?" No, we can't get along because
it's not in our nature. Our nature is warfare.
But none the less, I have X-posted this to alt.fringeware which
is currently the loneliest newsgroup on the 'net because the magazine
Fringeware Review is devoted to just the kind of thing that NENSLO
is talking about, you know, ideas -- not answers or anything --
just ideas. All you SubGenii should subscribe to it right now,
but you'll have to find the address yourself. Plus, in addition
to a few interesting ideas, they include some Schwa and other
comix and a catalog in the back where they sell mind-gadgets.
I'm sure they would WELCOME a submission from the Assinated Nen-Master
himself and they might even pay the man who knows more about
Frenchman Blondot than anyone else on Earth and they might even
include a picture of the Atomic Brain in the article.
Hell! They published an interview of Stang that Stang did over
the phone so you know these guys are either cool or not too picky
or both.
: That's if you're into THINKING at all. Otherwise it will just
:BORE YOU. So you might just want to rent The Mask, "zero to hero" dude,
:maybe it'll happen to YOU. ha ha
:
: Skeptical of the intellectual level of his audience,
OK, then give us a test. I've got college degrees, but that
doesn't mean anything other than I sat in a classroom and told
people the right thing because the right thing is what they want
to hear. I subscribe to Scientific American and I own so many
books that you'd think I wanted to start a library -- not that
means a read them. Well, I do start to read them but usually
I get through a hundred pages or so than then I deem myself educated
in the subject and go out and buy another.
I'll start the "cultured" and "intellectual" test.
1. Who were the Hittites?
2. Tell us something about Charlemagne.
3. Contrast the city-states of Athens and Rome.
4. Why is the U.S. dollar losing value?
5. Trace the atomic theory of matter all the way from
Democrites to the present.
6. What killed Mozart?
7. Explain the "Bing Bang" theory of the orgin of the universe.
8. Why is it so difficult to find a cure for HIV infections?
9. How was the feudal system in England different from that in France?
10. Give some examples of satirical humor. Don't leave out Voltaire
and Jonathon Swift. Be sure that your answer is *really* funny.
Yeah, and define humor while you're at it. If you want to
include a lengthy exegesis of something from the Monty Python
group then that's fine as long as you balance it off with something
from Aristophanes. If you rattle on about Douglas Adams stuff
then we'll also expect you do balance that off with something
from Umberto Eco and Kurt Vonnegut. Extra points if you do
Thomas Pynchon and Philip Dick *in* *parallel*. Even MORE
extra points if it's funny. THE MOST extra points if you find
something that was left out of the _Book_ _of_ _the_ _SubGenius_
and was *pointedly* *ignored* in the _Revelation-X_, the _"Bob"acryphon.
: NENSLO
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Subject: Intellectual Test, was Re: Repost from CYBER list
From: MONTYKINS@news.delphi.com (MONTYKINS@DELPHI.COM)
caedmon@pine.circa.ufl.edu (Simon Wagstaff) writes:
>I'll start the "cultured" and "intellectual" test.
>1. Who were the Hittites?
"A member of a conquering people in Asia Minor and Syria with an empire
in the 2d millenium B.C." - Webster's Seventh
For some reason, this edition of Merriam-Webster says "Reg. U.S. Pat.
OFF." on it. I didn't know you could patent books, so I guess there's
some very advanced binding.
>2. Tell us something about Charlemagne.
Real Name: Charles the Mediocre.
>3. Contrast the city-states of Athens and Rome.
Athens: Greek and small. Rome: Roman and absurdly large. In fact, I take
issue with the theory that Rome was a city-state at all, except during
its very early days. Certainly the Empire that stretched from England to
Egypt was bigger than that. Yea, verily - - sorry, I had a Latin class
flashback.
>4. Why is the U.S. dollar losing value?
It's a commie plot. If only we'd listend to Senator Charlie McCarthy!
>5. Trace the atomic theory of matter all the way from
> Democrites to the present.
Atoms are (in order) small and indivisible, composed of small orbiting
particles, composed of a blur of probability, probably a fiction, and
composed of small and indivisble parts.
>6. What killed Mozart?
He had a vision of the future, and heard "Rock Me Amadeus".
[Alternate Answer: F. Murray Abraham]
>7. Explain the "Bing Bang" theory of the orgin of the universe.
Well, Bing Crosby had sex with the universe's "orgin" and . . .
I'm sorry. Spelling jokes are beneath me.
>8. Why is it so difficult to find a cure for HIV infections?
The International Medical Conspiracy. BTW, I went to my local Orgaincally
Holistic Natural Heaalth Food Store and asked if they had Hydrogen
Peroxide yesterday. It comes in FLAVORS?! They had a $20 bottle of
35%-strength, flavored with Aloe Vera (ALOE VERA!). They said their brand
comes in Cinnamon and some sort of mint, too. It had a list of
ingredients alonger than Coca-Cola. Wha?
(Real Answers [pick one or more]: 1) Because the HIV [NOT "HIV virus",
which would be redundant] changes form capriciously, 2) Because any
anti-HIV agent might turn out to be an anti-normal-human-cells agent, 3)
Because HIV isn't what leads to AIDS anyway))
>9. How was the feudal system in England different from that in France?
The French got invaded by Germans; the British got invaded by French.
>10. Give some examples of satirical humor. Don't leave out Voltaire
> and Jonathon Swift. Be sure that your answer is *really* funny.
> Yeah, and define humor while you're at it. If you want to
> include a lengthy exegesis of something from the Monty Python
> group then that's fine as long as you balance it off with something
> from Aristophanes. If you rattle on about Douglas Adams stuff
> then we'll also expect you do balance that off with something
> from Umberto Eco and Kurt Vonnegut. Extra points if you do
> Thomas Pynchon and Philip Dick *in* *parallel*. Even MORE
> extra points if it's funny. THE MOST extra points if you find
> something that was left out of the _Book_ _of_ _the_ _SubGenius_
> and was *pointedly* *ignored* in the _Revelation-X_, the _"Bob"acryphon.
Voltaire, Jonathan Swift, and "Bob" are stranded on a desert island when
they find Aladdin's lamp. A Genie appears and gives them each one wish.
Voltaire says (in French) "I wish that all the people in France knew how
to read, so they could read my works and be free."
Swift says "I wish that all the people that have read my works could read
well enough to UNDERSTAND my works, so that I would be free."
"Bob" says "I wish that all people everywhere could be free, so that I
could sell them gimcracks, gewgaws and gizmos."
And the Genie says "No, just kidding, I'm actually a hallucination. You
guys are all starving to death on a desert island."
BTW, how come desert islands always have palm trees on them?
-Monty
--
[IMAGE]
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