USUALLY PART 2
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sat, 02 Oct 2004 11:01:43 -0700
--------
A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner
that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything.
The owner thinks for a minute, then says, "I've
got it -- a centipede!" The man says, "A centipede?
I can't imagine a centipede doing everything.
But, okay ... I'll try a centipede."
He gets the centipede home and says to it, "Run down to the
corner and get me a newspaper." The centipede
walks out the door. Ten minutes later, no centipede.
Twenty minutes later, no centipede. Thirty minutes
later, no centipede.
The man is wondering what's going on. The centipede
should have been back in a couple of minutes.
Forty-five minutes later, still no centipede!
The man can't imagine what happened. Did the
centipede run away? Did it get run over by a
car? Finally, he goes to the front door and opens
it... and there's the centipede sitting right
outside the door.
The man says, "Hey! I sent you 45 minutes ago
to run down to the corner and get me a newspaper.
What's the story?"
The centipede says, "Kiss my ass, I'll do as I please."
Correspondent:: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)
Date: 02 Oct 2004 18:07:38 GMT
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Nenslo wrote:
>A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner
>that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything.
>
>The owner thinks for a minute, then says, "I've
>got it -- a centipede!" The man says, "A centipede?
>I can't imagine a centipede doing everything.
>But, okay ... I'll try a centipede."
>
>He gets the centipede home and says to it, "Run down to the
>corner and get me a newspaper." The centipede
>walks out the door. Ten minutes later, no centipede.
>Twenty minutes later, no centipede. Thirty minutes
>later, no centipede.
>
>The man is wondering what's going on. The centipede
>should have been back in a couple of minutes.
>Forty-five minutes later, still no centipede!
>The man can't imagine what happened. Did the
>centipede run away? Did it get run over by a
>car? Finally, he goes to the front door and opens
>it... and there's the centipede sitting right
>outside the door.
>
>The man says, "Hey! I sent you 45 minutes ago
>to run down to the corner and get me a newspaper.
>What's the story?"
>
>The centipede says, "Kiss my ass, I'll do as I please."
I agree with this story.
--
"Just because a gravitational field or a galactic information-network does not
make pee pee or vote the straight Republican ticket [..does not mean..] SHe is
not planful, powerful, and humorously in charge of galactic evolution."
-Timothy Leary
Correspondent:: polar bear
Date: Sat, 02 Oct 2004 15:09:27 -0700
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In article <415EED07.B63E95DB@yahoox.com>, nenslo
wrote:
> A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner
> that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything.
>
> The owner thinks for a minute, then says, "I've
> got it -- a centipede!" The man says, "A centipede?
> I can't imagine a centipede doing everything.
> But, okay ... I'll try a centipede."
>
> He gets the centipede home and says to it, "Run down to the
> corner and get me a newspaper." The centipede
> walks out the door. Ten minutes later, no centipede.
> Twenty minutes later, no centipede. Thirty minutes
> later, no centipede.
>
> The man is wondering what's going on. The centipede
> should have been back in a couple of minutes.
> Forty-five minutes later, still no centipede!
> The man can't imagine what happened. Did the
> centipede run away? Did it get run over by a
> car? Finally, he goes to the front door and opens
> it... and there's the centipede sitting right
> outside the door.
>
> The man says, "Hey! I sent you 45 minutes ago
> to run down to the corner and get me a newspaper.
> What's the story?"
>
> The centipede says, "Kiss my ass, I'll do as I please."
Centipede goes into a bar - orders a double scotch on the rocks.
Bartender says, "say, we don't get many centipedes in here."
Centipede says, "did I come here for a conversation? Just shut up and
pour the drink."
pb