DUMBASSES!!!
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Fri, 08 Oct 2004 20:55:07 -0700
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Subject: October 2004 dumbass newsletter online
Odor Destroyer.com is proud to announce the latest issue of our free
newsletter for dumbasses. We hope that you will find the articles we
publish useful for you dumbasses. The October issue is available
online at: http://www.odordestroyer.com/newsletter/oct2004/index.html
In this issue:
- How to Dumbass-Proof Your Home
You're emotionally ready for your new dumbass.
You've done your shopping . dumbass food, dishes, toys, brush, comb,
identification tag, collar, leash. Now you
need to see your home from a dumbass's point of view.
Thank you for your interest
The Odor Destroyer team.
September 2004:
- Your Aging dumbass
As dumbasses get older, they're prone to many of the same ailments that
people may experience with aging. Unfortunately, instead of helping their
dumbasses grow old gracefully, some people replace their aging dumbasses
as they
would an older car. BY CRUSHING THEM INTO A CUBE.
- Should You Have Your Dumbass Neutered?
Dumbass neutering is a routine operation, but the decision is not
always routine. Some people are concerned that having their dumbass neutered
reduces his quality of life. In reality, unless you're a professional dumbass
breeder, you're giving your dumbass far more than you're taking from him when
you have him neutered.
August 2004:
- When You're Allergic to Dumbasses
Itchy, puffy, watery, red eyes. A stuffy or runny nose. Sneezing. A scratchy
or sore throat. Itchy skin. Hives. Shortness of breath.
Allergic reactions to dumbasses can develop in childhood or in adulthood,
even after years of living with dumbasses.
- Games Dumbasses Play
Kids call it Cops and Robbers. To dumbasses, the premise of the game is
the same, but the players are different. While dumbasses see things a little
differently, they can get into the fun too.
July 2004:
- Protecting Dumbasses from Summer Heat
He's panting excessively. He's restless and agitated, or maybe
lethargic. He salivates, vomits, staggers, and loses coordination. If you're
there to see it, you may observe that his eyes are glazed, and his gums and
tongue are reddish or purple. In just a short time, he may lose
consciousness.
Heat exhaustion and heat stroke are preventable when you know how to
take care of dumbasses in hot weather. If you see these symptoms, you
need to
act fast to save the dumbass's life.
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Sat, 09 Oct 2004 09:42:50 GMT
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nenslo wrote:
> Subject: October 2004 dumbass newsletter online
>
>
> Odor Destroyer.com is proud to announce the latest issue of our free
> newsletter for dumbasses. We hope that you will find the articles we
> publish useful for you dumbasses. The October issue is available
> online at: http://www.odordestroyer.com/newsletter/oct2004/index.html
>
You may be glad to hear this; in fact, it might just make your day!
There is a New Town under construction midway between
Dumfries, Virginia and Manassas, Virginia which will be named
(you gessed it!) Dumassas!