FINALLY GOT TO USE MY BEGGAR LINE
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Wed, 17 Nov 2004 22:17:21 -0800
--------
Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
that's not too much to ask is it?
Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
Drunk: Well I'm POOR and they won't GIVE me a JOB!
Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
Me: You will not outsmart me.
Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
Drunk: Oh.
Me: (enters store)
Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 06:47:51 -0700
--------
nenslo wrote:
>
> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to
> get my prescription for Imitrex filled and
> as I was locking my bike this drunk came up
> and tried to pull the "endearing candor"
> approach:
>
> Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm
> only asking for a PENNY, that's not too much
> to ask is it?
Me: No! Fuck you! Get out of my face you asshole
or I'll call a cop! (enters Walgreens, demands to
see Manager)
Manager: Can I help you sir?
Me: There's a dirty, disgusting, bum out there who
threatened me! I want you to call the police!
Manager: Oh, he's back? He's never threatened
anyone before. He's a disabled veteran who we let
go through our dumpster, but if he bothered you...
Me: Damn right he bothered me! He's got no right
to get in my face and threaten me and demand my
money. Filthy animals ought to be put down.
Manager: I'll go ask him to leave, sir.
Me: No, damn you! I want him arrested! If you won't
call the police then I will! Fascist assholes like
that ought to be fucking killed!
Manager: Sir, please watch your language, there are
children in the store.
Me: Well, fuck them. They shouldn't be in a fucking
store that lets fucking criminals threaten people
because their fucking Nazi store managers won't
grab a fucking butcher knife like this one and run
off fascist winos that threaten their customers.
Manager: Sir, please put down the knife. I'll have to
ask you to leave the store, sir.
Me: What the fuck! You're kicking ME out of Walgreens
instead of that fucking criminal in your parking lot?
(tears knife out of package, menaces manager with knife
then runs out door.)
Drunk: Hey! Put down the knife, man!
Me: I'm going to kill you, you fucking fucker Nazi!
Drunk: (uses Jeet Kun Do to disarm Nenslo, leaving him
with his stolen butcher knife in the chest.)
(later)
Manager: (to police) Yes, he was a customer who came in
here every now and then. He was always rude and mean
to the cashiers, but this time he flipped out. He stole
a knife and threatened me with it, then tried to stab
this man in the parking lot.
Policeman: Oh, yes, we know this guy. Called himself
"Nenslo". A real jerk.
--
"YOU BELONG TO US NOW!"
"GET DOWN WITH MY SICKNESS!!"
--Kino Beman, brand name
Correspondent:: "ouroboros rex"
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 10:19:37 -0600
--------
"nenslo" wrote in message
news:419C3E70.43EAC021@yahoox.com...
> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
> Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
> that's not too much to ask is it?
>
> Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
> money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
> you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
> Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
>
> Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
Drunk: OK, suture yourself ! (whips out pistol)
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 17:20:13 GMT
--------
> "nenslo" wrote in message
> news:419C3E70.43EAC021@yahoox.com...
> > Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> > Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> > to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
> > Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
> > that's not too much to ask is it?
> > Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
> > money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
> > you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
He's a better man than you because he doesn't have a NENSLO line
clogging up his head, just cheap wine and some ruined neurons. What's
YOUR excuse? Gimme pie, I'm a Pope and I'm only asking for one slice,
not the whole thing, you selfish bastard.
Nenslo: weaned on lemons, fortified by ipecac, sustained by bad books
and baboon bile.
I can just see your headstone now: "Born, painted, kvetched, baked,
snubbed a bum, died tragically late."
--
HellPope Huey
I am not a conservative crossdresser, but IT COULD HAPPEN!!
YES!!! MY KIND SHALL something something!!
And if you gaze for long into an abyss,
the abyss gazes also into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
When you gaze into the abyss,
Mrs. Barstow pokes you in the eye
and screams at you to plug up that hole in her shower stall
or she'll KICK YOU INNA NUTS.
- HellPope Huey
Correspondent:: pastorekenneth@aol.com (PastoreKenneth)
Date: 18 Nov 2004 17:32:34 GMT
--------
Imitrex?
They can't prescribe you anything better
than THAT?
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 22:58:55 GMT
--------
HellPope Huey wrote:
> > "nenslo" wrote in message
> > news:419C3E70.43EAC021@yahoox.com...
>
> > > Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> > > Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> > > to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
> > > Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
> > > that's not too much to ask is it?
> > > Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
> > > money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
> > > you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
> He's a better man than you because he doesn't have a NENSLO line
> clogging up his head, just cheap wine and some ruined neurons. What's
> YOUR excuse? Gimme pie, I'm a Pope and I'm only asking for one slice,
> not the whole thing, you selfish bastard.
>
> Nenslo: weaned on lemons, fortified by ipecac, sustained by bad books
> and baboon bile.
>
> I can just see your headstone now: "Born, painted, kvetched, baked,
> snubbed a bum, died tragically late."
>
> --
>
>
Truck driver gives panhandler $1, then strikes and kills man as he drives away
-
Friday, November 19, 2004
(11-19) 13:12 PST BIRMINGHAM, Ala. (AP) --
A truck driver gave a panhandler $1, then struck and killed the man as he drove
his rig away. Police said it was possible the driver didn't know what happened.
Michael Burns, 43, who had no known address, was standing near an interstate
ramp Thursday and holding a cardboard sign: "Homeless. Need Help. God Bless."
Witnesses and police said a trucker who was stopped for a red light gave a
dollar to Burns. As the truck started making a left turn, its trailer knocked
Burns down, and two sets of the truck's tires ran over him.
The truck had no identifiable markings, and witnesses weren't able to get a tag
number.
Officer Randall Ward said it appears to be an accident.
"A dollar cost him his life," he said.
URL:
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/news/archive/2004/11/19/national1612EST0604.DTL
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
©2004 Associated Press
Correspondent:: "Revi Shankar"
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 18:21:12 -0500
--------
; "GfbAEV" wrote ...
> Witnesses and police said a trucker who was stopped for a red light gave a
> dollar to Burns. As the truck started making a left turn, its trailer
knocked
> Burns down, and two sets of the truck's tires ran over him
> URL:
>
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/news/archive/2004/11/19/national
1612EST0604.DTL
>
I actually SAW an accident that was nearly identical to that. Except it was
a guy on a ten-speed. It was NOT AT ALL pretty.
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 23:24:17 GMT
--------
Revi Shankar wrote:
> ; "GfbAEV" wrote ...
>
> > Witnesses and police said a trucker who was stopped for a red light gave a
> > dollar to Burns. As the truck started making a left turn, its trailer
> knocked
> > Burns down, and two sets of the truck's tires ran over him
> > URL:
> >
> http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/news/archive/2004/11/19/national
> 1612EST0604.DTL
> >
>
> I actually SAW an accident that was nearly identical to that. Except it was
> a guy on a ten-speed. It was NOT AT ALL pretty.
Well, from now on, when asked for money by the terminally indiginent,
I'll just smile and say, "The check's in the mail!"
And then run over them.
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 20 Nov 2004 16:42:49 GMT
--------
>I actually SAW an accident that was nearly identical to that. Except it was
>a guy on a ten-speed. It was NOT AT ALL pretty.
>
I had the "fun" of witnesing 2 simular accidents.
Once while I was working as an intern on a State Highway Survey Crew. The Crew
Chief & intrument man were set up w/ the Theadolite inthe median of US 13, I
was setting up the prism for the EDM, As i was leaveling the tri-lock, I heard
a noise, turned around only to see a samll Izusu Panel truck had run over the
crew cheif and the instrument man. The chief was killed instantly, Robin, the
instrument man died after several hours, never to regain conciusnes.
The second was during the cntruction of the new Bridge across the C & D Canal.
They had alane closed off to do the tie in paveing, and a tractor-trailer hit a
flagger, draged him under the wheels. The driver never even knew he hit the
guy. Only found out when he got to where he was going and saw the clothing,
blood & flesh cuaght on the trailer.
All adds up to the fact I am glad I do not have to work around traffic anymore.
And I always slow down in construction areas, even if it pisses off teh yuppie
in the SUV behind me.
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:18:32 -0800
--------
HellPope Huey wrote:
>
> I can just see your headstone now:
Yeah well I can just smell me crapping on your headstone now.
Seriously. You left it here that time and I had it bored out for a terlet.
Correspondent:: "Kristian Lahdensuo"
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 18:33:16 +0200
--------
"nenslo" kirjoitti
viestissä:419C3E70.43EAC021@yahoox.com...
> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
> Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
> that's not too much to ask is it?
>
> Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
> money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
> you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
> Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
>
> Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
>
> Drunk: Well I'm POOR and they won't GIVE me a JOB!
>
> Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
> Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
>
> Me: You will not outsmart me.
>
> Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
>
> Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
>
> Drunk: Oh.
>
> Me: (enters store)
It is always annoying afterwards when you give something to a beggar. Feels
like you were cheated.
That drunk was actually quite smart, even though I don't quite get it how
your last line got him so confused. He could have easily replied: So what?
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:22:39 -0800
--------
Kristian Lahdensuo wrote:
>
>
> It is always annoying afterwards when you give something to a beggar. Feels
> like you were cheated.
Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
spirit." Cheated is exactly what you are. You are paying someone to be
a beggar and a parasite.
> That drunk was actually quite smart, even though I don't quite get it how
> your last line got him so confused. He could have easily replied: So what?
Actually I just darted into the store before he could formulate another
smartass reply. He was TOO smart to be throwing his life away as a
drunken beggar but not smart enough not to.
Correspondent:: Cardinal Vertigo
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 05:25:39 GMT
--------
nenslo wrote:
> Kristian Lahdensuo wrote:
>>
>> It is always annoying afterwards when you give something to a beggar. Feels
>> like you were cheated.
>
> Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
> spirit."
By whom, besides you?
> Cheated is exactly what you are. You are paying someone to be
> a beggar and a parasite.
>
>> That drunk was actually quite smart, even though I don't quite get it how
>> your last line got him so confused. He could have easily replied: So what?
>
> Actually I just darted into the store before he could formulate another
> smartass reply. He was TOO smart to be throwing his life away as a
> drunken beggar but not smart enough not to.
I take it you don't view addiction as a treatable medical condition?
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 22:50:23 -0800
--------
Cardinal Vertigo wrote:
>
> nenslo wrote:
> > Kristian Lahdensuo wrote:
> >>
> >> It is always annoying afterwards when you give something to a beggar. Feels
> >> like you were cheated.
> >
> > Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
> > spirit."
>
> By whom, besides you?
Oh I don't know... how about THE FUCKING BIBLE. Look it up if you are
so smart.
>
> > Cheated is exactly what you are. You are paying someone to be
> > a beggar and a parasite.
> >
> >> That drunk was actually quite smart, even though I don't quite get it how
> >> your last line got him so confused. He could have easily replied: So what?
> >
> > Actually I just darted into the store before he could formulate another
> > smartass reply. He was TOO smart to be throwing his life away as a
> > drunken beggar but not smart enough not to.
>
> I take it you don't view addiction as a treatable medical condition?
I have said absolutely nothing of the kind.
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 05:53:37 GMT
--------
In article <41A1779E.71AADD93@yahoox.com>, nenslo
wrote:
> Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
> spirit."
Nenslo quoting Jesus Christ is just so.... CREEEEEPY.
Its as if The President and his wife were being interviewed by Peter
Jennings and her head turned sloooowly around like in "The Exorcist" and
George laughed and patted her on the knee and said "That's my girl!"
STOP it, Orton, that's just WRONG.
--
HellPope Huey
In real life, I am a warm and playful companion
hampered only by being a telekinetic alcoholic.
I never have to pay for a drop.
"You haven't hit rock bottom
until you've fought off three other drunks
to suck on a Hungarian booby-pickle."
- "The Drew Carey Show"
"They'll let anyone foster a kid.
They'd let me and I'm a 100 years old and a Communist to boot."
- Don Rickles, "The Wool Cap"
Correspondent:: asscoassc@aol.comsucks (AssCo Assc)
Date: 22 Nov 2004 16:00:27 GMT
--------
<< > Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
> spirit."
Nenslo quoting Jesus Christ is just so.... CREEEEEPY. >>
Don't worry, he was quoting Nenslo Christ.
I think he was confusing "alms" with "false
testimony" or something like that.
_________________________________________________
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking
Causes Lung Cancer, Heart Disease,
Emphysema, And May Complicate Pregnancy.
_________________________________________________
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 17:12:55 GMT
--------
In article <20041122110027.23255.00000986@mb-m03.aol.com>,
asscoassc@aol.comsucks (AssCo Assc) wrote:
> << > Even Jesus is quoted as saying "Don't give alms if it disturbs your
> > spirit."
>
> Nenslo quoting Jesus Christ is just so.... CREEEEEPY. >>
>
> Don't worry, he was quoting Nenslo Christ.
> I think he was confusing "alms" with "false
> testimony" or something like that.
Hmmm, Nenslo Christ. That has potential. He keeps coming back HERE, so
he obviously likes to suffer, yet will nail himSELF up, which saves us
all the trouble of doing it. In turn, we pay for our sins by interacting
with him and triggering the process, so there is muy self-flaggelation
for any acolytes who "worship" at the altar of FUCK YOU. Its a
sin-biotic relationship!
Gee, its like a complete photographic negative of hopeless goat-stomach
linings such as purple, who make US do it all and because Nenslo is an
intelligent bitch rather than a dumbass, you get saved from your own
ignorance with every post.
Damn, that's the best religious deal in town, aside from Dobbs, where
the goal is just to lay around and kvetch in a haze of bad jokes,
sprinkled with a few mindless bacchanalia where you seek to take on
regional spirochetes from different parts of the country.
Religion is like dropping sea urchins in your pants and then trying to
convince others that they should do it too, because its "good." Oh, SHUT
UP.
--
HellPope Huey
In real life, I am a warm and playful companion
hampered only by being a telekinetic alcoholic.
I never have to pay for a drop.
"You haven't hit rock bottom
until you've fought off three other drunks
to suck on a Hungarian booby-pickle."
- "The Drew Carey Show"
"They'll let anyone foster a kid.
They'd let me and I'm 100 years old and a Communist to boot."
- Don Rickles, "The Wool Cap"
Correspondent:: asscoassc@aol.comsucks (AssCo Assc)
Date: 22 Nov 2004 18:16:58 GMT
--------
<<<< Hmmm, Nenslo Christ. >>
Seven Woes of Nenslo
Then Nenslo said to the crowds on alt.slack: " Do not do what they do, for they
do not SHUT UP. You BITE MY ASS and make a show of lengthy posts that complain
of bullshit, yet you do not SHUT THE FUCK UP yourselves! Shove it up your wide
phylactery and dangling ganglions. The greatest among you shall SHUT UP for
whoever SHUTS UP will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.
Woe to you, those who do not SHUT UP, if anyone merely states that they SHUT
UP, it means nothing; for if they SAY they shut up it means they did not SHUT
THE FUCK UP. You swallow squid and shit dungbeetles. You clean the inside of
the cup and dish, but you leave the outside all dirty and greasy from my latest
batch of vegetarian sloppy joes so I have to wash them over again first clean
the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean instead
of being dirty spreading grease to the cup and dish below them in the cup board
to then I have to wash all the dishes all over again for I am like a carpenter
who leaves the couch out in the rain and uses old asbestos patching compound
that he found in the trash to repair the crumbling walls of the house like a
doctor who prescribes according to the directions of pharmaceutical sales
representitives or a member of the Green Party that frequently buys those
little fuckin' resin objects from the dollar store that were manufactured in
China where pollutions standards are barely a concept so just SHUT UP.
_________________________________________________
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking
Causes Lung Cancer, Heart Disease,
Emphysema, And May Complicate Pregnancy.
_________________________________________________
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 21:16:22 GMT
--------
In article <20041122131658.07211.00000836@mb-m10.aol.com>,
asscoassc@aol.comsucks (AssCo Assc) wrote:
> <<<< Hmmm, Nenslo Christ. >>
>
> Seven Woes of Nenslo
> Then Nenslo said to the crowds on alt.slack: " Do not do what they do, for
> they
> do not SHUT UP. You BITE MY ASS and make a show of lengthy posts that
> complain
> of bullshit, yet you do not SHUT THE FUCK UP yourselves! Shove it up your
> wide
> phylactery and dangling ganglions. The greatest among you shall SHUT UP for
> whoever SHUTS UP will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be
> exalted.
> Woe to you, those who do not SHUT UP, if anyone merely states that they SHUT
> UP, it means nothing; for if they SAY they shut up it means they did not SHUT
> THE FUCK UP. You swallow squid and shit dungbeetles. You clean the inside of
> the cup and dish, but you leave the outside all dirty and greasy from my
> latest
> batch of vegetarian sloppy joes so I have to wash them over again first clean
> the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean
> instead
> of being dirty spreading grease to the cup and dish below them in the cup
> board
> to then I have to wash all the dishes all over again for I am like a
> carpenter
> who leaves the couch out in the rain and uses old asbestos patching compound
> that he found in the trash to repair the crumbling walls of the house like a
> doctor who prescribes according to the directions of pharmaceutical sales
> representitives or a member of the Green Party that frequently buys those
> little fuckin' resin objects from the dollar store that were manufactured in
> China where pollutions standards are barely a concept so just SHUT UP.
Nenslo is like a Rwandan Highlands gorilla: rare, endangered,
semi-beautiful in its habitat and precious, but if you had one in the
house, its nasty habits would cause you to bash its head in with a
shovel while it was eating so as to dispense with having to clean up any
more ape feces.
--
HellPope Huey
In real life, I am a warm and playful companion
hampered only by being a telekinetic alcoholic.
I never have to pay for a drop.
"You haven't hit rock bottom
until you've fought off three other drunks
to suck on a Hungarian booby-pickle."
- "The Drew Carey Show"
"They'll let anyone foster a kid.
They'd let me and I'm 100 years old and a Communist to boot."
- Don Rickles, "The Wool Cap"
Correspondent:: John Baker
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 17:27:08 GMT
--------
nenslo wrote:
> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
{Tale of the need to humiliate the downtrodden snipped}
Imitrex ad found: "So if migraines are disrupting your life, ask your
doctor about prescription IMITREX. It was specifically made to target
the nerves and blood vessels that are believed to trigger your total
migraine – the pain, nausea,sensitivity to light and sound – so you get
the relief you need, without drowsiness."
Apparently these migraine things must be some type of karma.
Correspondent:: Don Radford
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 04:39:46 GMT
--------
John Baker wrote:
> nenslo wrote:
>
>> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
>> Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
>> to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
>
> {Tale of the need to humiliate the downtrodden snipped}
>
> Imitrex ad found: "So if migraines are disrupting your life, ask your
> doctor about prescription IMITREX. It was specifically made to target
> the nerves and blood vessels that are believed to trigger your total
> migraine – the pain, nausea,sensitivity to light and sound – so you get
> the relief you need, without drowsiness."
>
> Apparently these migraine things must be some type of karma.
At $170 per pack of nine pills -- yeah, probably.
--
Art and Fashion for the New Conspiracy
http://www.cafepress.com/luciddragon
the Mystical RevvedErrand Rockin' Don Radford
Certified God by the holy authority of
the White Lotus Fortune Cookie Company
June 23, 2004
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:32:38 -0800
--------
John Baker wrote:
>
> nenslo wrote:
> > Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> > Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> > to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
> {Tale of the need to humiliate the downtrodden snipped}
A guy who's already drunk by noon and staggering around begging for more
booze money is downtrodden? Yeah, "THEY" shouldn't do that to him, that
bad old Them that is treading him down so bad.
>
> Apparently these migraine things must be some type of karma.
Actually, it's Imitrex that's some kind of karma. Not only that, I paid
nothing for it, since it was covered by the State Health Plan, which
also costs me nothing other than having no excess property or funds. My
prescription is refillable for eighteen pills a month for the next year.
Free $345 worth of migraine relief per month for one year. Yeah the
universe is sure giving me what I deserve. It's just so terribly FAIR.
Correspondent:: Blair P. Houghton
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 21:10:10 GMT
--------
nenslo wrote:
>Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
>Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
>to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
>Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
>that's not too much to ask is it?
>
>Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
>money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
>you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
>Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
>
>Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
>
>Drunk: Well I'm POOR and they won't GIVE me a JOB!
>
>Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
>Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
>
>Me: You will not outsmart me.
>
>Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
>
>Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
Drunk: But...I'm the PRESIDENT!
The Secret Service agents should have been a tipoff.
--Blair
"Cheney really needs to slip him
into the loop once in a term."
Correspondent:: BUMEAGLE@YAHOO.COM (BUMEAGLE)
Date: 18 Nov 2004 13:50:22 -0800
--------
nenslo wrote in message news:<419C3E70.43EAC021@yahoox.com>...
> Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
> Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
> to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
> Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
> that's not too much to ask is it?
>
> Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
> money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
> you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
> Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
>
> Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
>
> Drunk: Well I'm POOR and they won't GIVE me a JOB!
>
> Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
> Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
>
> Me: You will not outsmart me.
>
> Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
>
> Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
>
> Drunk: Oh.
>
> Me: (enters store)
.............EITHER THAT OR...........YOU ONE OF THE HEARTLESS,
COLDEST, AND CHEAPEST SMARTASSES AROUND.......... DRUNK: KEEP UP THE
GOOD SON-OF A-BITCH WORK YOU FUK'IN CHEAP BASTARD. AND MOTHER FUCKER,
COCKSUCKER, AND MAGGOT FAG FUCKER![WITH THE FINGER, OF COURSE]
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:36:53 -0800
--------
BUMEAGLE wrote:
>
> .............EITHER THAT OR...........YOU ONE OF THE HEARTLESS,
> COLDEST, AND CHEAPEST SMARTASSES AROUND..........
Can't argue with that. So heartless I don't feel the slightest bit of
responsibility for seeing that a stinking drunk gets more booze. I'd
rather see him stop drinking and have a positive productive creative
intelligent happy life which he will never do if I help him stay drunk,
that's how much of a cruel bastard I am.
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 18 Nov 2004 23:13:54 GMT
--------
>Today I went to the walgreens drug store to get my prescription for
>Imitrex filled and as I was locking my bike this drunk came up and tried
>to pull the "endearing candor" approach:
>
>Drunk: I'm a BEGGAR, and I'm POOR, and I'm only asking for a PENNY,
>that's not too much to ask is it?
>
>Me: (My treasured and as yet unused beggar line) If I were to give you
>money I would be rewarding you for being a beggar, and that might give
>you the idea that being a beggar is a GOOD thing... but it ISN'T.
>
>Drunk: Well... being a beggar is better than being a THIEF isn't it?
>
>Me: That's a decision YOU will have to make, not me.
>
>Drunk: Well I'm POOR and they won't GIVE me a JOB!
>
>Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
>Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
>
>Me: You will not outsmart me.
>
>Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
>
>Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
>
>Drunk: Oh.
>
>Me: (enters store)
>
I didn't know Stang was out in your neck of the woods.
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 23:40:27 GMT
--------
nenslo wrote:
In article <20041118181354.08086.00000906@mb-m05.aol.com>,
mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull) wrote:
> >Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
> >> >Me: You will not outsmart me.
> >> >Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
> >> >Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
> >> >Drunk: Oh.
> >> >Me: (enters store)
> >
> I didn't know Stang was out in your neck of the woods.
Worse yet, he wasn't in the store using the coupons I sent him. You
just can't be nice to some people.
--
HellPope Huey
I am not a conservative crossdresser, but IT COULD HAPPEN!!
YES!!! MY KIND SHALL something something!!
And if you gaze for long into an abyss,
the abyss gazes also into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
When you gaze into the abyss,
Mrs. Barstow pokes you in the eye
and screams at you to plug up that hole in her shower stall
or she'll KICK YOU INNA NUTS.
- HellPope Huey
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:38:16 -0800
--------
HellPope Huey wrote:
>
> nenslo wrote:
> In article <20041118181354.08086.00000906@mb-m05.aol.com>,
> mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull) wrote:
>
> > >Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
> > >> >Me: You will not outsmart me.
> > >> >Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
> > >> >Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
> > >> >Drunk: Oh.
> > >> >Me: (enters store)
> > >
> > I didn't know Stang was out in your neck of the woods.
>
> Worse yet, he wasn't in the store using the coupons I sent him. You
> just can't be nice to some people.
Coupons for the gallon size Cool Mint Listerine. What a pal.
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 17:04:33 GMT
--------
In article <41A17B47.777F2563@yahoox.com>, nenslo
wrote:
> HellPope Huey wrote:
> > nenslo wrote:
> > In article <20041118181354.08086.00000906@mb-m05.aol.com>,
> > mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull) wrote:
> >
> > > >Drunk: ... I could wash and wax YOUR BIKE???
> > > >> >Me: You will not outsmart me.
> > > >> >Drunk: Why? Because you KNOW EVERYTHING?
> > > >> >Me: Because YOU have been DRINKING, and I HAVEN'T.
> > > >> >Drunk: Oh.
> > > >> >Me: (enters store)
> > > >
> > > I didn't know Stang was out in your neck of the woods.
> >
> > Worse yet, he wasn't in the store using the coupons I sent him. You
> > just can't be nice to some people.
>
> Coupons for the gallon size Cool Mint Listerine. What a pal.
Hey, if you're too poor to afford real creme de menthe, it can act as a
reasonable subsititute when you want to make the pobucker version of a
mint julep. Use it to knock back a few Benadryl and in no time, you'll
be looking up in the sky and seeing geese with oddly glowing bellies who
closely resemble triangular UFOs. Some UFOs honk, you know. No, really,
they do.
--
HellPope Huey
In real life, I am a warm and playful companion
hampered only by being a telekinetic alcoholic.
I never have to pay for a drop.
"You haven't hit rock bottom
until you've fought off three other drunks
to suck on a Hungarian booby-pickle."
- "The Drew Carey Show"
"They'll let anyone foster a kid.
They'd let me and I'm 100 years old and a Communist to boot."
- Don Rickles, "The Wool Cap"
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 01:18:07 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. nenslo
sat down and wrote
>Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
Not sure about 'work', but the ability to do a regular job is peculiar
skill which needs to be attained when young, and is easily lost after
months or years of unemployment.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 03:18:20 GMT
--------
In article <0HljvgJPz+nBFwBn@clara.net>,
"Rev. Simian" wrote:
> The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. nenslo
> sat down and wrote
> >Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
> Not sure about 'work', but the ability to do a regular job is peculiar
> skill which needs to be attained when young, and is easily lost after
> months or years of unemployment.
This caused many interesting things to come to mind, but when I tried
to type some of them out, my ear lobes got REALLY, REALLY HOT and I
decided to leave all o' them worms in their can.
As with religion, some will cheer in righteous agreement, some will
jeer with searing disdain and a few will run at you with long knives.
You can live through debate, but those knives really SMART, yes they do.
If you try to debate with someone who is running at you with a knife,
well, fuck your stupid gizzard ANYway, ah tell ya whut.
By gum, I'll become mayor of Dobbstown YET, but I make no promises
about the scheduling of the trains.
--
HellPope Huey
If we could just get everyone to close his eyes for an hour
and imagine world peace,
think of how serene and quiet it would be
until the looting started.
"I don't need matches to burn stuff down.
All I need is these two hands
and a lack of adult supervision."
- "That 70s Show"
Setting a good example for children
takes all the fun out of middle age.
- William Feather
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 02:43:55 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. HellPope Huey
sat down and wrote
>> Not sure about 'work', but the ability to do a regular job is peculiar
>> skill which needs to be attained when young, and is easily lost after
>> months or years of unemployment.
>
> This caused many interesting things to come to mind, but when I tried
>to type some of them out, my ear lobes got REALLY, REALLY HOT and I
>decided to leave all o' them worms in their can.
>
> As with religion, some will cheer in righteous agreement, some will
>jeer with searing disdain and a few will run at you with long knives.
>You can live through debate, but those knives really SMART, yes they
>do. If you try to debate with someone who is running at you with a
>knife, well, fuck your stupid gizzard ANYway, ah tell ya whut.
I can take it! At least you've got earlobes. Never trust a man without
them - along with the clitoris, the only parts of a human being made
PURELY FOR PLEASURE. Take heed - the Lord "Bob" himself has no auricular
fleshy extrusions WHATSOEVER - another good justification for his
forthcoming annihilation.
On the subject of WORK, meaning
job/leisurejob/leisurejob/leisureretirementdeath, I kind of agree with
B*b Bl*ack, which might not make me very popular around here either, if
anyone actually CARED what I said anyway.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 03:09:32 GMT
--------
"Rev. Simian" wrote:
> The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. HellPope Huey
> sat down and wrote
> >> Not sure about 'work', but the ability to do a regular job is peculiar
> >> skill which needs to be attained when young, and is easily lost after
> >> months or years of unemployment.
> >
> > This caused many interesting things to come to mind, but when I tried
> >to type some of them out, my ear lobes got REALLY, REALLY HOT and I
> >decided to leave all o' them worms in their can.
> >
> > As with religion, some will cheer in righteous agreement, some will
> >jeer with searing disdain and a few will run at you with long knives.
> >You can live through debate, but those knives really SMART, yes they
> >do. If you try to debate with someone who is running at you with a
> >knife, well, fuck your stupid gizzard ANYway, ah tell ya whut.
>
> I can take it! At least you've got earlobes. Never trust a man without
> them - along with the clitoris, the only parts of a human being made
> PURELY FOR PLEASURE. Take heed - the Lord "Bob" himself has no auricular
> fleshy extrusions WHATSOEVER - another good justification for his
> forthcoming annihilation.
>
> On the subject of WORK, meaning
> job/leisurejob/leisurejob/leisureretirementdeath, I kind of agree with
> B*b Bl*ack, which might not make me very popular around here either, if
> anyone actually CARED what I said anyway.
>
Well, I sorta like Bob Black. I mean, hey! He used to bop Mrs. Nenslo,
so he can't THAT bad, huh?
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 22 Nov 2004 04:19:59 GMT
--------
In article ,
"Rev. Simian" wrote:
> The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. HellPope Huey
> sat down and wrote
> > As with religion, some will cheer in righteous agreement, some will
> >jeer with searing disdain and a few will run at you with long knives.
> >You can live through debate, but those knives really SMART, yes they
> >do. If you try to debate with someone who is running at you with a
> >knife, well, fuck your stupid gizzard ANYway, ah tell ya whut.
>
> I can take it! At least you've got earlobes.
When it gets really hot, they droop and I trip over them. Kids try to
slide down them as if they were Slip & Slides. Its really annoying. I
have to shoot one in the ass with my taser to get the others to take a
hint.
> On the subject of WORK, meaning
> job/leisurejob/leisurejob/leisureretirementdeath, I kind of agree with
> B*b Bl*ack, which might not make me very popular around here either, if
> anyone actually CARED what I said anyway.
Its not a problem. The majority of us have such whopping cases of ADD,
we can barely remember to pee until our bladders are so bulgy, we're in
danger of drenching the TV from across the room. Then we're into
auto-taser territory and the shocks just make the ADD worse. Goddamnit,
if it ain't one thing, its yer mother.
--
HellPope Huey
In real life, I am a warm and playful companion
hampered only by being a telekinetic alcoholic.
I never have to pay for a drop.
"You haven't hit rock bottom
until you've fought off three other drunks
to suck on a Hungarian booby-pickle."
- "The Drew Carey Show"
"They'll let anyone foster a kid.
They'd let me and I'm a 100 years old and a Communist to boot."
- Don Rickles, "The Wool Cap"
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:39:17 -0800
--------
"Rev. Simian" wrote:
>
> The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. nenslo
> sat down and wrote
> >Me: Any man who REALLY wants to work, CAN work.
>
> Not sure about 'work', but the ability to do a regular job is peculiar
> skill which needs to be attained when young, and is easily lost after
> months or years of unemployment.
>
Funny, it was employment which caused me to lose that skill.