Yeti Dung-Fu/Pet Owner's Manual pt. 31
Posted by:: "frater S.O.D.D.I."
Date: 28 Mar 2005 22:15:42 -0800

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So I live in this urban area, see, and the dog needs to go out one last
time at night to do her business. Around midnight the neighborhood can
get a little weird with all the dubious characters wandering around.
More dubious than me, I mean.

I'm a weenie, I try to avoid fights, and I don't carry weapons. I just
want to walk the damn dog, smoke a cigarette and be left in peace.

I do carry a plastic poopy bag, though, 'cause I'm a considerate
neighbor.

I'm coming down a loong block and this really hinky kid starts
following me (I know what is hinky and what isn't after decades of
living in some of the worst areas in NYC). The dog wants to do her
sniffing all the bushes stuff and I'm having a hard time keeping her
moving fast.

This hinky guy is maybe 30 feet behind me.

Then Emmy, bless her little doggy heart, squats down and makes a large
soft boom-boom, which I quickly pick up in the bag.

This emboldened me enormously, as I immediately realized that a mugger
who might be prepared to set upon someone would definitely NOT fuck
with a fellow who would be more than glad to smash a bag full of HOT
DOG SHIT into said hinky person's face.

My Dung-Fu is STRONG.



Posted by:: König Prüße, GfbAEV
Date: Tue, 29 Mar 2005 06:33:52 GMT

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"frater S.O.D.D.I." wrote:

>So I live in this urban area, see, and the dog needs to go out one last
>time at night to do her business. Around midnight the neighborhood can
>get a little weird with all the dubious characters wandering around.
>More dubious than me, I mean.
>
>I'm a weenie, I try to avoid fights, and I don't carry weapons. I just
>want to walk the damn dog, smoke a cigarette and be left in peace.
>
>I do carry a plastic poopy bag, though, 'cause I'm a considerate
>neighbor.
>
>I'm coming down a loong block and this really hinky kid starts
>following me (I know what is hinky and what isn't after decades of
>living in some of the worst areas in NYC). The dog wants to do her
>sniffing all the bushes stuff and I'm having a hard time keeping her
>moving fast.
>
>This hinky guy is maybe 30 feet behind me.
>
>Then Emmy, bless her little doggy heart, squats down and makes a large
>soft boom-boom, which I quickly pick up in the bag.
>
>This emboldened me enormously, as I immediately realized that a mugger
>who might be prepared to set upon someone would definitely NOT fuck
>with a fellow who would be more than glad to smash a bag full of HOT
>DOG SHIT into said hinky person's face.
>
>My Dung-Fu is STRONG.
>

Yep!




Posted by:: "krustymadfaker"
Date: 29 Mar 2005 08:14:44 -0800

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frater S.O.D.D.I. wrote:

>My Dung-Fu is STRONG.

I'm allergic to small dogs. I'm even more allergic to Dung-Fu. Which
reminds me I still need to see Kill Bill.

Rev-Sci-Fi-entist KrustyMADfaker
"1980's sh*t! Pump up the volume!!!
Stick Live Aid wrist bands to the
equation! Q-Bert not included!!"



Posted by:: "just john"
Date: 29 Mar 2005 09:01:19 -0800

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krustymadfaker wrote:

> I'm allergic to small dogs. I'm even more allergic to Dung-Fu. Which
> reminds me I still need to see Kill Bill.

When you watch the first movie and get to the scene where a guy holds
up a jar of Vaseline, you'll discover Jeb Bush's real motivation for
his actions of the past couple years.

Tom "sloppy seconds" DeLay, too.