SubGenius Bill of Health
Posted by:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 07 Mar 2005 23:41:00 GMT
--------
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they
were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into
the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna
promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim
out.
When the Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she
immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now
considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news
and bad news.
The good news is you're being discharged. Since you were able to
rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of
another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound
mindedness.
The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his
bathrobe belt in the bathroom right after you saved him. I am so sorry,
but he's dead." Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself; I put him there to
dry. How soon can I go home?"
--
HellPope Huey
Editor of "'Bob's' Big Book of Alien Hickies" and
"Stop That Until The Cop Car
Rounds the Corner, You Fool!"
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton,
you may as well make it dance.
~ George Bernard Shaw
"Your explanations are pure weapons-grade Balonium!"
- "Futurama"
Posted by:: Zapanaz
Date: Mon, 07 Mar 2005 18:19:08 -0800
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On Mon, 07 Mar 2005 23:41:00 GMT, HellPope Huey
wrote:
>
> Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they
>were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into
>the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna
>promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim
>out.
>
> When the Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she
>immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now
>considered her to be mentally stable.
>
> When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news
>and bad news.
>
> The good news is you're being discharged. Since you were able to
>rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of
>another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound
>mindedness.
>
> The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his
>bathrobe belt in the bathroom right after you saved him. I am so sorry,
>but he's dead." Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself; I put him there to
>dry. How soon can I go home?"
Did you ever notice how much "Bob" looks like Princess Diana?
NOW, tell me if that was a non-sequiter or not, and maybe YOU can go
home!
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
She looks like she knows the Dewey decimal system and isn't afraid to use it
- The Definite Maybe
Posted by:: HellPope Huey
Date: Tue, 08 Mar 2005 04:28:30 GMT
--------
In article ,
Zapanaz wrote:
> Did you ever notice how much "Bob" looks like Princess Diana?
Did you ever notice how much Bea Arthur looks like Mr. Ed?
--
HellPope Huey
Editor of "'Bob's' Big Book of Alien Hickies" and
"Stop That Until The Cop Car
Rounds the Corner, You Fool!"
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton,
you may as well make it dance.
~ George Bernard Shaw
"Your explanations are pure weapons-grade Balonium!"
- "Futurama"
Posted by:: Zapanaz
Date: Mon, 07 Mar 2005 21:27:44 -0800
--------
On Tue, 08 Mar 2005 04:28:30 GMT, HellPope Huey
wrote:
>In article ,
> Zapanaz wrote:
>
>> Did you ever notice how much "Bob" looks like Princess Diana?
>
> Did you ever notice how much Bea Arthur looks like Mr. Ed?
eew!
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
"Religion isn't the opiate of the masses. When
properly used, religion is the methamphetamine
of the masses." - nu-monet v6.0 in alt.slack
Posted by:: HellPope Huey
Date: Tue, 08 Mar 2005 18:07:40 GMT
--------
In article <7udq21porm2c4oljhhodfl9lhbbi5cb76i@4ax.com>,
Zapanaz wrote:
> On Tue, 08 Mar 2005 04:28:30 GMT, HellPope Huey
> wrote:
>
> >In article ,
> > Zapanaz wrote:
> >
> >> Did you ever notice how much "Bob" looks like Princess Diana?
> >
> > Did you ever notice how much Bea Arthur looks like Mr. Ed?
>
> eew!
Or how much Mr. Ed looks like that IMBJR guy. Christ, everyone in this
Church but Armand Geddyn and Nu-Monet are as ugly as wart hog anii.
I'll try real hard to look prettier Real Soon Now.
--
HellPope Huey
Underhanded Gutbucket Rockabilly
Washtub Bassballs Overlord
I lost some time once.
Its always in the last place you look for it.
- Delirium
"Do you ever feel like wherever you are,
you should be somewhere else?"
"Only when I'm awake."
- "The Education of Max Bickford"