My version of those stupid email get to know so and so surveys
Posted by:: "Priestess Pisces of the 99.44% anti-pure" Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2005 00:28:42 GMT
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-When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own cat)?
-How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
character in them?
-Which of the following statement do you agree with more
1-cute = evil
2- cute = good
3- cute = vomit
4- all of the above
-Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice the
dead duck it was riding had a penis?
-If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
entities choice on your forehead?
- Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
- Cannollis or Cheesecake?
- Name your favorite solstice.
- Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
- Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
- mozzarella or feta?
- Star Wars or Star Trek
- Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would be
most pleased to work under.
-Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
- Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to be
funny.
- Favorite Troll
- Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
- Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If you
havent would you?
"Priestess Pisces of the 99.44% anti-pure"
wrote in message
news:_OLYd.2121$qf2.2064@newsread2.news.atl.earthlink.net...
>
> -When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own cat)
About 12 months ago, after 4 hours of intense relationship management it
stopped clawing into my skull to wake me up at 4am
> -How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
> character in them?
0
> -Which of the following statement do you agree with more
> 1-cute = evil
> 2- cute = good
> 3- cute = vomit
> 4- all of the above
1
> -Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice the
> dead duck it was riding had a penis?
Doubt it, im pretty sure all ducks are bi-sexual, well thats what he told me
> -If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
> product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
> entities choice on your forehead?
Yes
> - Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
I can be a back door or front door man, depending on the circumstance
> - Cannollis or Cheesecake?
Cheesecake covered in vegemite
> - Name your favorite solstice.
Summer!, well winter in the northern hemisphere
> - Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
Dont know about trust, but I would treat him as a patriarchal authority
figure whilst secretly resenting him
> - Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
Shut up
> - mozzarella or feta?
Feta or PETA is ok to especially on an all meat pizza
> - Star Wars or Star Trek
DS9
> - Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would be
> most pleased to work under.
Please what a silly question Captian Sisko of course!
> -Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
Prolix - The prolothalasiser of bad spelling
> - Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to be
> funny.
Human society
> - Favorite Troll
Well Nenslo of course but hes not really a troll
> - Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
Consumption tax all the way
> - Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If you
> havent would you?
no comment
>
>
> There done.
> do what thou wilt.
> _Priestess Pisces_
>>>>-When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own
cat)?
Never. Arguing with a cat would be like arguing with a sprig of
parsley, except the parsley can't get honked at you for it and take a
dump on your pillow.
-How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
character in them?
None. You see one eaten brain, you've seen 'em all. I've seen plenty,
so I can make the comparison.
>>>>-Which of the following statement do you agree with more
1-cute = evil
2- cute = good
3- cute = vomit
4- all of the above
Generally 3. Anything cute that is not a baby generally deserves to be
pounded with a hammer until less cute.
>>>>-Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice
the dead duck it was riding had a penis?
I don't think sexual preference has a lot of meaning in something with
a brain that weighs less than 3 ounces.
>>>>-If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
entities choice on your forehead?
No, only my butt. I guess that would cut the price considerably.
>>>>- Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
No matter how I answer that, I'm setting myself up for a terrible pun.
>>>>- Cannollis or Cheesecake?
Screw that, gimme about 12 pounds of Sam's Club chocolate mints
cookies.
>>>>- Name your favorite solstice.
Chandra. I like the sound of it.
>>>>- Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
I have since about 1981 and its too late to change cults now.
>>>>- Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
Yes and what would you expect? I am Huey.
>>>>- mozzarella or feta?
As food or sexually? If the former, mozzarella; if the latter, feta.
>>>>- Star Wars or Star Trek
Star Trek. Far smarter overall and more OF it. Plus I still have the
fantasy of doing an Orion fung woman.
>>>>- Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would
be most pleased to work under.
Leela.
>>>>-Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
That's a smarmy one to send to ME, the Prince of Run-On Sentences.
>>>>- Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators
to be funny.
The Republican Party.
>>>>- Favorite Troll
Dr. Laura. Her statue graces the entrance to the Hall of Hypocrites.
>>>>- Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
Graduated income. The Flat Rate screws the non-rich percentage-wise.
>>>>- Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If
you havent would you?
No and probably not. Hot is highly relative and a lot of porn stars are
either jaded or not all that great to wake UP to afterwards. The number
of hours romping about minus your pants is a very small subset of time
compared to the rest of Life, which has a rule about "No clothes, no
service." Therefore, if I couldn't shoot the breeze with them
afterwards, even the Tits of Athena wouldn't wow me much beyond an
appreciative glance for the sake of the structural elegance. No thinkee,
no fuckee.
>>>>There done. do what thou wilt.
Have a nice stiff one... maybe a drink as well.
--
HellPope Huey
Former keyboardist for Bleeding Gums Murphy
Inside your head,
there's a record playing,
saying hold on
- Tom Waits, "Hold On"
"A monkey with a gun
would make a great TV show."
- "That 70s Show"
Posted by:: "Paul Casino" Date: 12 Mar 2005 17:26:38 -0800
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>When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own cat)?
Just got done fifteen minutes ago. Little bastard TiVo'ed over all my
SeaLab 2021 episodes.
>How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
>character in them?
4, 5 if you count "The Devil's Rain". They weren't zombies per se, they
were possessed by Satan, but they moved in a zombie like fashion.
>Which of the following statement do you agree with more
> 1-cute = evil
> 2- cute = good
> 3- cute = vomit
> 4- all of the above
2. I'm secure enough in my hetero to admit that I like cute things.
Especially when they're drunk and easy.
>Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice the
>dead duck it was riding had a penis?
Oh, no. That was one flaming duck.
>If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
>product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
>entities choice on your forehead?
Which company we talking about here? I don't want the logo to Fleet
Enemas on my mellon, but I would consider a Nike swoosh. (Yeah, it's
pink. Fuck you.)
>Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
I break in through the window like a theif in the night, baby.
>Cannollis or Cheesecake?
Cannollis, and to speak different is not only heresy, it's unamerican.
>Name your favorite solstice.
That would have to be...oh, wait, I don't care about solstices because
I am not a god damn dirty hippie.
>Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
I already did. The moments before I did were the final nano-seconds of
"goodness" in my life. It's all been downhill from there. And I'd do it
again in a heartbeat.
>Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
I constantly talk to myself when I think other people are listening,
but they're not.
>mozzarella or feta?
Feta. Mozz backs me up for days.
>Star Wars or Star Trek.
Star Wars for the storyline, Star Trek for the better acting.
>Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would be
>most pleased to work under.
Captain America. But I'm not shaving my legs like he made the first few
Bucky's do. That's just weird.
>Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
(sigh) NEXT.
>Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to be
>funny.
Cops, the TV show and the real thing.
>Favorite Troll
The kind that will bring me drinks when I snap my fingers. What do they
call them?
>Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
I dunno, I'm always broke, which one's that?
>Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If you
>havent would you?
Nope, although a chick I went to high school with apparently showed her
cooch to the world in a "Readers Pics" section of Cheri. Amber Morris.
Used her real name, too. Would I? Once I saw her test results, it's
very likely. I'm a guy for christ's sake, what the hell kinda question
is that, it's like asking a starving man if he wants a Twinkie!
Posted by:: AttikDwella Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2005 02:12:38 GMT
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"Priestess Pisces of the 99.44% anti-pure"
wrote:>
>-When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own cat)?
Never did. Sure, I tried talking to one ... once, but it just sat there
and stared at me. No fun at all!
>-How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
>character in them?
0 ( if you don't count the chick flicks )
>-Which of the following statement do you agree with more
> 1-cute = evil
> 2- cute = good
> 3- cute = vomit
> 4- all of the above
4: evil = ( kinda ) cute, cute = vomit, and vomit = good ( well, a
relief for the stomach anyway )
>-Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice the
>dead duck it was riding had a penis?
Tough one... Have you tried asking the ducks?
>-If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
>product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
>entities choice on your forehead?
Depends... in what currency? And the tattoo: in what colour?
>- Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
Errm... what kind of question is that? Anyway, that's
situation-dependent. (Do I know the place? IS there a side or back door to begin with?)
>- Cannollis or Cheesecake?
Red meat.
>- Name your favorite solstice.
Summer.
>- Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
Not as a salesman. I still might trust him as a Messiah, though...
>- Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
Sure, but there is some disagreement as to whether I enjoy it. I'll get
back to you on that once I have reached a consensus.
>- mozzarella or feta?
mozza' anytime!
>- Star Wars or Star Trek
ST --sure, SW is also pretty cool, but ONLY visually, and since I'm not
deaf...
>- Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would be
>most pleased to work under.
Does Captain Proton count?
>-Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
Prozac lollypops. (BTW: did u know that THAT was the secret behind Kojak
successfully beating his smoking habit?)
>- Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to be
>funny.
Humanity.
>- Favorite Troll
Quark.
>- Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
Graduated income.
>- Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If you
>havent would you?
Nope x 2 ( unless you would consider the stack of 8mm movies on my shelf
'accessible' )
>
>There done.
>do what thou wilt.
What do I win?
AttikDwella
Posted by:: phy Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2005 03:02:46 GMT
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"Priestess Pisces of the 99.44% anti-pure"
wrote in
news:_OLYd.2121$qf2.2064@newsread2.news.atl.earthlink.net:
>
> -When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own cat)?
> -How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
> character in them?
I really wish that I could truthfull say "All of them"
> -Which of the following statement do you agree with more
> 1-cute = evil
> 2- cute = good
> 3- cute = vomit
> 4- all of the above
1 and 2
> -Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice the
> dead duck it was riding had a penis?
I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, and I got 25 bucks for a fucked
up duck.
> -If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
> product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
> entities choice on your forehead?
Probably, but then I would use part of the money to get it lasered off my
forehead and transferred to my foreskin.
> - Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?
The bathroom window. Oh, wait, I thought you said exit.
> - Cannollis or Cheesecake?
Pastrami on Rye.
> - Name your favorite solstice.
The summer one. The winter one is too damned cold.
> - Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe?
Hell, no, I wouldn't trust any salesman. I would only buy from one that
smoked a pipe.
> - Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations?
Yes and yes.
> - mozzarella or feta?
Sharp cheddar and fresh strawberries is my favorite breakfast.
> - Star Wars or Star Trek
Starcraft.
> - Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would be
> most pleased to work under.
I would say Captain and Teneale but then I would wonder about myself.
> -Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word
FUCK YOU.
> - Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to be
> funny.
Religion.
> - Favorite Troll
Me.
> - Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?
Flat rate but with credits and exemptions.
> - Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If you
> havent would you?
No and yes. I mean maybe.
>
>
> There done.
> do what thou wilt.
> _Priestess Pisces_
I did what I done.
-phy
Posted by:: Zapanaz Date: Sat, 12 Mar 2005 19:39:40 -0800
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On Sun, 13 Mar 2005 00:28:42 GMT, "Priestess Pisces of the 99.44%
anti-pure" wrote:
>do what thou wilt.
but what do you wilt?
in all this shit hole.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
"It looks like Congress has finished investigating the 9/11 attacks
and doesn't it figure? They spent three weeks and two million
dollars investigating the three thousand WTC murders... but they
spent three YEARS and two HUNDRED million chasing after Clinton's
zipper!"
- Jay Leno
Posted by:: "Rev. Richard Skull" Date: 12 Mar 2005 20:22:47 -0800
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<<-When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own
cat)? >>
Tonight. He was reaching up on the table trying to snag my
chesseburger.
>>-How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
<<
Does Reagan count as a zombie?
>>-Which of the following statement do you agree with more
1-cute = evil
2- cute = good
3- cute = vomit
4- all of the above <<
1 except every altenate tuesdays in any month with an "R" in it, then
its 3.
>>-Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice
the
dead duck it was riding had a penis? <<
If it fucking a dead duck, the its a necrophilia duck.
>>-If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
entities choice on your forehead? <<
only if they made condoms
<<- Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door? >>
I like the back door sometimes, but not too many women like it.
<<- Cannollis or Cheesecake? >>
A Cheesecake Cannolli!
<<- Name your favorite solstice>>
The one where we get to sacrific the lawyers.
<<- Would you trust a salesman who smoked a pipe? >>
Depends on what he's selling
>>- Do you talk to yourself? Do you enjoy the conversations? <<
Due to a recent spat, I am not talking to myself until I apolgize to me
and admit I was wrong.
<<- mozzarella or feta? <<
The more goats the better!
<<- Star Wars or Star Trek >>
Star Trek
<<- Name a captain of any movie or television series vessel you would
be
most pleased to work under. <<
The Commander of the U-Boat in Das Boot.
<<-Define Prolix without looking up the meaning of the word >>
Always get your blowjobs from a Prostitiute, because a Prolix better
then some amatour.
>>- Favorite thing to laugh at that was not intended by its creators to
be
funny. <<
Fox news.
<<- Favorite Troll >>
nenslo
<<- Flat Rate Consumption or Graduated income?>>
Graduated Flat Consumtion. A Senete Compromise proposal.
<<- Ever slept with someone who is in a currently accessible porno? If
you
havent would you? >>
No, and yes and are you asking?
Posted by:: König Prüße, GfbAEV Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2005 06:16:32 GMT
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Cannolis or Cheesecake?
Both!
But I want to share a cheesecake discovery.
I am liking this cooking show "America's Test Kitchen"
because they take a recipe and try it a bunch of different
ways and with different ingredients until they get the best
result. So, they were experimenting with cheesecake,
and they cut down the amount of cream cheese from
32oz to 24oz for a creamier and less crumbly result.
Maybe. But they experimented with different kinds of
graham cracker crusts, but concluded that animal crackers
made the best cheesecake shell! They turned them into
crumbs, then added 2 tbs of butter to bind it. Animal crackers!
Go figure! They made lemon, and had a big discussion about
how to select lemons, and that the zest of the peel is necessary.
But they also topped the damned cheesecake with lemon curd,
which is not necessary. Also, none of this might be true for the
best Amaretto cheesecake. Or Kaluha cheesecake.
So, I'm crazy about the classic cannoli, and sometimes chocolate,
and Amaretto.
Regular cannoli and espresso--
Posted by:: "frater S.O.D.D.I." Date: 13 Mar 2005 13:30:18 -0800
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And how I typically answer them:
> -When did you last argue with a cat (does not have to be your own
cat)?
fuck you
> -How many movies are in your household that have at least one zombie
> character in them?
die screaming
> -Which of the following statement do you agree with more
> 1-cute = evil
> 2- cute = good
> 3- cute = vomit
> 4- all of the above
eat my shit
> -Can a duck truly be homosexual, or is it just ill and didnt notice
the
> dead duck it was riding had a penis?
stupid dickwipe
> -If an entity paid you a sum equal to the cumulative gross national
> product of japan since 1960 would you tattoo a corporate logo of the
> entities choice on your forehead?
your mother
> - Do you usually enter thru the front, back or side door?