Posted by:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Fri, 04 Mar 2005 12:50:27 -0500
--------
In article , paco
wrote:
> Do something nicey nice for Stang and get him to send you a poster. Then
> spend sleepless nights waiting by the mail box for it to arrive. When it
> does cum start kissing and dry humping the mail man/woman who delivered it
> to you. Tease yourself by not opening the poster tube right away but spend
> hours drooling over ever inch of it's exterior.
>
> Did he lick those stamps himself? If I dust it for prints will his be
> on it? Did he pick out the "Special olympics" spamp 'cause he knows I like
> to make fun of the retarded? An American customs sticker is on the outside.
> It's been signed by Doug, I almost wear off the ink by rubbing it against my
> groin.
>
> By now I need the question " What do you look like on the inside?"
> answered. So pop the little white top comes off. And nestled inside is the
> glorious artwork of the subgenius. By now It's been a few hours and my cock
> is sore from being erect for so long, so I get out the cock ring, and the
> strap on.
>
> Inside the tube is coated with what tastes like seamen, so I take a few
> samples back to the lab. I have our best scientists work around the clock
> to clone Stang from his spent seed. This Uber-Clone will be able to destroy
> N.Y. with it's laser beam eyes.
>
> Share the good news with the Mytars and watch a few of them explode
> before your very eyes at the thought of something that was once touched by
> "HIM". Looking at the hole at the end of the tube it looks to be about the
> right size.....so....lubricate....and give 'er a whirl. Hmmmm not bad. The
> mytars watch with envy but hey, being a leader of a Stateless alien
> terrorists mind-control group has it's perks.
>
> "BoB"ahu Ackbar!!!
> "BoB"ahu Ackbar!!!
> "BoB"ahu Ackbar!!!
>
>
Luckily this condition is easily cured by the attending of any X-Day
Drill, devival, book signing or supermarket-opening that I'm at. I've
seen 'em get over it REAL quick after only a brief personal exposure.
That sudden downcast look after the look of bright expectation, it's
almost kinda sad but I've gotten used to it.
I know how it is... I get the same way over stuff that J. R. "Bob"
Dobbs touched or even looked at once. Then, when I really met him, he
was just this drunk smelly rude guy, and then Puzzling Evidence shot
him, and now I'm GLAD he stays away from shows praising His Sweet Name.
Sorry it took so long to getting around to sending that poster, but it
took some research to find mailing tubes that have just the right
whitish encrustation aoround the inside and are still fairly CHEAP. I
think that stuff is just guano, used as a kind of poor man's sealant.
I am glad you noticed the 80 cent Special Olympics stamps. I do buy
those specially to honor our more athletic UnSaved and Unwitting
SubGenii.
If I remember correctly though what's REALLY holy on that mailing tube
is the ADDRESS LABEL which is filled out by PRINCESS WEI, if it looks
like it was professionally applied by an expert calligrapher. If it
looks like a ten year old wrote the address than I did the label. HOUR
OF SLACK disks are like that too. If you get the gorgeous hand-labeled
flowing engraved-looking one, Wei labeled it and it's a GOOD show. If
it has that 5th grade looking printing on it then it's one I had to
rush through all on my oddy-knocky.
Anyway thank for doing that archiving with Fenian!
You must be CRAZY!!
((lip-flipping crazy-man sound effect,
blebberblebberblebberblebberblebber))
--
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc.
(4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected, Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB