History is MADE!

From: "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
Date: Sun, Dec 14, 2003

George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be re-elected owing solely to
some foreign dictator!!!

But the truth is, it's a conspiracy of course, and Saddam, rich Republican
that he is, arranged his capture for Christmas, and the proof of that is he
had $750,000 in his hole there, which was earmarked for CREEP.

Bush gets to wear a shit eating grin for about 11 months. His farts won't
smell for some time. And that $750,000 will fund quite a few covert
operations against the Dems.

Well, we as SubG's should feel indirectly happy, because the selected
resident of the White House will be madly wanking all day just like the
bully that got away with the nerd kid's lunch. One more documented wanker
is like the debbil getting one more soul, after all. Big stuff.

And OHHHHH! the orgasms those two will have splitting our $87 Billion (with
Halliburton, of course). You can almost smell the spunk clear over here in
Ohio. They CAUGHT the bad guy!

I mean, there won't be any movies like Hitler's Brain and all that. They
know exactly where the baddest guy of the 21st century was, and got him.
This is unprecedented.

You NEVER actually get the bad guy! Look at Hitler! Nobody should be so
damn frigging sure. But now it is. This is HISTORIC. Not like not knowing
who killed Kennedy and shit like that. There he is, bigger than shit!

Saddam's rectum is about to become the shortest and busiest interstate route
in the world, too. People will be lining up for YEARS to "try" this
shitraghead in every way possible. He may never see what's above the
horizon again, remaining in a facile bent over entry posture until he's
dead, and then I imagine, for a while after that.

If I were Bush, though, I'd get on the ass of those armament companies that
sold us the four or five bombloads that supposedly got this guy several
times last year. Dammit, we're due a COMPLETE REFUND. They missed their
mark.

Well, if I want to buttfuck this guy, I gotta leave now and TAKE A NUMBER.
Now serving number 1,375,243...

[*]
-----

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH iDRMRSR:
>George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be re-elected owing solely to
>some foreign dictator!!!
>
>But the truth is, it's a conspiracy of course, and Saddam, rich Republican
>that he is, arranged his capture for Christmas, and the proof of that is he
>had $750,000 in his hole there, which was earmarked for CREEP.

There really is some sort of mind parasite that makes people stupid so
they accept empty episodic spectacle punctuated by clumsy
sentimentality as being brilliantly creative.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

"Science Does Not Remove the Terror of the Gods"
-- J.R. "Bob" Dobbs

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

GREAT comeback! Perfect wording.

This whole thing reminds me so much of the Story of Jesus.

Luckily, because of cloning, the door is still open for future badfilm
about armies of Saddam clones. (This captured Saddam being just a
double anyway, one of Saddam's many, hired for this well timed
propaganda move by the U.S. military.) And, the true story of the whole
hidden ancient city under Baghdad full of giant robots and living
dinosaurs has yet to break.

I am wondering now if it's a GOOD or BAD sign that I first learn this
sort of news not from The News, but from an iDRMRSR post to alt.slack.

I then went and read the various crowing news stories, but by then I
was already automatically feeding every sentence through my News
Translator Brain Filter that turns everything into the Weekly World
News tabloid sci-fi conspiracy thriller Made-for-TV movie version -- of
what's already a sci-fi thriller conspiracy news story.

Just another Vitiligo-Dotted Celebrity Dick Story, if you ask me. Now
we have to listen to leader scarecrows pretend to argue over who gets
to show him off first. The News buttfuxors.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

Not born.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>History is MADE!

>Not born.

Ah, well then those who do not nurture history are condemned to its nature.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>History is MADE!
>
>>Not born.
>
>Ah, well then those who do not nurture history are condemned to its nature.

Not to be *critical*, or anything.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH iDRMRSR:
>You NEVER actually get the bad guy! Look at Hitler!

Or Osama bin Laden

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

Man made booze, God made poison ivy -- WHO DO YOU TRUST?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Reverend Vertigo <jhobbs@myrealbox.com>

iDRMRSR wrote:
> George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be re-elected owing solely to
> some foreign dictator!!!

Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory for Bush & Co.?

WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WM fucking D!

When they find the WEAPONS OF MASS fucking DESTRUCTION which were SO
FUCKING CLOSE to being used that we had to go to war NOWNOWNOW without
waiting for the U.N. to get its shit together (thereby infuriating
PRETTY MUCH THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD), then and only then will the Bush
administration be vindicated.

When the NUKES and the TONS OF SARIN and VX and ANTHRAX and BOTULINIM
TOXIN and FUCKALL ELSE that Bush promised were A HEARTBEAT AWAY from
being used on YOU and WHOEVER YOU LOVE finally turn up, THAT will be a
great political victory for the Bush administration.

Finding Saddam in a hole in the ground quivering and soiling himself is
nice and all, sure, and might even help restabilize the area.

But be real. This little excursion isn't quite "JUSTIFIED" just yet.

I say this not as a Dean supporter but as an AMERICAN with a MEMORY and
some CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS.

--
"To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that
we are to stand by the President right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic
and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public."
- Theodore Roosevelt, 26th President of the United States, in 1918

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Unclaimed Mysteries <theletter_k_andthenumeral_4_doh@unclaimedmysteries.net>

Reverend Vertigo wrote in part:
> CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS.

Why do you hate America so much?

--
It Came From C. L. Smith's Unclaimed Mysteries.
http://www.unclaimedmysteries.net

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Jarto <jarto@difu.com>

Reverend Vertigo <jhobbs@myrealbox.com> wrote:
reign dictator!!!
>
>Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory for Bush & Co.?
>
>WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WM fucking D!
>
>When they find the WEAPONS OF MASS fucking DESTRUCTION which were SO
>FUCKING CLOSE to being used that we had to go to war NOWNOWNOW without
>waiting for the U.N. to get its shit together (thereby infuriating
>PRETTY MUCH THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD), then and only then will the Bush
>administration be vindicated.
>
>When the NUKES and the TONS OF SARIN and VX and ANTHRAX and BOTULINIM
>TOXIN and FUCKALL ELSE that Bush promised were A HEARTBEAT AWAY from
>being used on YOU and WHOEVER YOU LOVE finally turn up, THAT will be a
>great political victory for the Bush administration.
>
>Finding Saddam in a hole in the ground quivering and soiling himself is
>nice and all, sure, and might even help restabilize the area.
>
>But be real. This little excursion isn't quite "JUSTIFIED" just yet.
>
>I say this not as a Dean supporter but as an AMERICAN with a MEMORY and
>some CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS.

Aye Aye!

This lad has some brains and some unfaulty memory! He really could be
free Con Programming which I do believe does alter and fuck with your
memory. HEH! Daily lobotomy.

No, I don't think anyone has forgotten that the WMD-O-METER is still
ticking, and that deadly anthrax harvested at "known" laboratories in
Iraq have still not been found.

Yet I find myself quoting this excellent lyric by the late and great
Joe Strummer:

"The people must have something good to read on a Sunday"

Perfect timing no less to find Sad Adam finding in a hole. And even
better for the papers to sing the Bush administration's success. Gah.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Reverend Vertigo wrote:
> iDRMRSR wrote:
> > George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be
> > re-elected owing solely to some foreign dictator!!!
>
> Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory
> for Bush & Co.?
>
> WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WM fucking D!

Okay. So let's add it up. And to cut to the chase,
call them NUCLEAR WEAPONS, because any country with any
chemical industry and any hospital can make chemical
and biological weapons.

He HAD money. He WANTED Nuclear Weapons. Countries
were willing and did sell him parts to MAKE Nuclear
Weapons. His own people were so scared they told him
they HAD Nuclear Weapons, so he THOUGHT he had them.

He certainly had radioactive materials and explosives,
which are all you need to make a RADIATION BOMB. So
let's further discriminate and say "Not just Nuclear
Weapons, but FISSION Nuclear Weapons", instead of WMD.

Could he have made them? Certainly, and in the given
time period. Israel had already blown up ONE Nuclear
Reactor sold to him by the FRENCH which could have
produced weapons-grade uranium and plutonium.

Were the UN inspectors stopping him? Not really, but
for his ordering that the violations he didn't WANT
found weren't found. He also hid a lot of shit they
didn't have a clue about.

And, as far as Saddam's stability: here is a guy who
invested multiple millions of dollars to build a giant
CANNON, big enough to throw giant shells all the way
to Israel. Emplaced in a friggin' mountain! Like some
sort of funky James Bond villain.

And he takes every opportunity to try to SCARE the
world with some of the worst PR ever.

Basically, with the exception of those idiots everywhere
who would sell him dangerous toys, this guy was aching
to create a nuclear nightmare somewhere, and everybody
with common sense knew he had to go.

(The same with NK and Iran. We'll see. The world can
no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)

--
"President Bush is a patriot
and a good Christian."
-- Hellpope Huey

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@nmt.edu>

nu-monet v6.0 wrote:

<snip>
> The world can
> no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)

You talking to me?

John Starrett

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@nmt.edu>

nu-monet v6.0 wrote:
> The world can
> no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)

My ears are burning!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH nu-monet v6.0:
>Reverend Vertigo wrote:
>> iDRMRSR wrote:
>> > George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be
>> > re-elected owing solely to some foreign dictator!!!
>>
>> Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory
>> for Bush & Co.?
>>
>> WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WM fucking D!
>>
>
>Okay. So let's add it up. And to cut to the chase,
>call them NUCLEAR WEAPONS, because any country with any
>chemical industry and any hospital can make chemical
>and biological weapons.
>
>He HAD money. He WANTED Nuclear Weapons. Countries
>were willing and did sell him parts to MAKE Nuclear
>Weapons. His own people were so scared they told him
>they HAD Nuclear Weapons, so he THOUGHT he had them.
>
>He certainly had radioactive materials and explosives,
>which are all you need to make a RADIATION BOMB. So
>let's further discriminate and say "Not just Nuclear
>Weapons, but FISSION Nuclear Weapons", instead of WMD.
>
>Could he have made them? Certainly, and in the given
>time period. Israel had already blown up ONE Nuclear
>Reactor sold to him by the FRENCH which could have
>produced weapons-grade uranium and plutonium.
>
>Were the UN inspectors stopping him? Not really, but
>for his ordering that the violations he didn't WANT
>found weren't found. He also hid a lot of shit they
>didn't have a clue about.
>
>And, as far as Saddam's stability: here is a guy who
>invested multiple millions of dollars to build a giant
>CANNON, big enough to throw giant shells all the way
>to Israel. Emplaced in a friggin' mountain! Like some
>sort of funky James Bond villain.
>
>And he takes every opportunity to try to SCARE the
>world with some of the worst PR ever.
>
>Basically, with the exception of those idiots everywhere
>who would sell him dangerous toys, this guy was aching
>to create a nuclear nightmare somewhere, and everybody
>with common sense knew he had to go.
>
>(The same with NK and Iran. We'll see. The world can
>no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)

But George Bush is OK?

Or England or Germany or France or Russia?

Or India or Pakistan?

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

"I can't understand why you don't get any mail from me. Perhaps
it's because I haven't been writing." Groucho Marx

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>But George Bush is OK?
>Or England or Germany or France or Russia?
>Or India or Pakistan?

Little fruitcake countries with little dicks have nothing to lose.

Bigger fruitcake countries with bigger dicks can be somewhat controlled via
interrelated interests, common resources and tangled economies.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)

That would assume that the people making the decisions are of sound mind. The
decision to start this little was was made despite GOOD intell form poeple who
have been following the internal affairs of Traqi for at least 15 to 20 years.

They instead, use "intel" provided by a ex-patriat Iraqi who left at 14 and had
not set foot in teh country since (40+ years). This same guy was also found
guilty in Jordon (one of the more stable Arab Nations) of all sorts of Bank
Frauds that would put Neil Bush to shame!

Now knowing that, what makes you think that interrealted intrests & tangled
economies will make this group think again?

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>But George Bush is OK?
>>>
>>>Or England or Germany or France or Russia?
>>>
>>>Or India or Pakistan?
>>
>>Little fruitcake countries with little dicks have nothing to lose.
>>
>>Bigger fruitcake countries with bigger dicks can be somewhat controlled via
>>interrelated interests, common resources and tangled economies.

>That would assume that the people making the decisions are of sound mind. The
>decision to start this little was was made despite GOOD intell form poeple
>who
>have been following the internal affairs of Traqi for at least 15 to 20
>years.
>
>They instead, use "intel" provided by a ex-patriat Iraqi who left at 14 and
>had
>not set foot in teh country since (40+ years). This same guy was also found
>guilty in Jordon (one of the more stable Arab Nations) of all sorts of Bank
>Frauds that would put Neil Bush to shame!
>
>Now knowing that, what makes you think that interrealted intrests & tangled
>economies will make this group think again?

"Little fruitcake countries with little dicks have nothing to lose.

and

Bigger fruitcake countries with bigger dicks can be somewhat controlled via
interrelated interests, common resources and tangled economies."

is the political "groupthink." Why Iraq can be "justified".

"Now knowing that, what makes you think that interrealted intrests & tangled
economies will make this group think again?"

I don't. Its just the spin.

You want reality? Ha.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)

>He HAD money. He WANTED Nuclear Weapons. Countries
>were willing and did sell him parts to MAKE Nuclear
>Weapons. His own people were so scared they told him
>they HAD Nuclear Weapons, so he THOUGHT he had them.

BUT... The Ireali's DO have them and have denied the UN Nuclear Inspection
Agency access to their facilities just like North Korea and Iran have.

If Bush were really serious, he would make Isreal distroy its nuclear weapns.
As the were the real reason Saddma wanted them (and the real reason Iran wants
them)

>He certainly had radioactive materials and explosives,
>which are all you need to make a RADIATION BOMB. So
>let's further discriminate and say "Not just Nuclear
>Weapons, but FISSION Nuclear Weapons", instead of WMD.

All the radioactive materials were under state control, that is untill the
Bushies invaded. Now several tons are missing. Mostly stolen for the
containers, whcih Iraqi's have used for Bar-be-ques, washer machines, or sold
for scrap. About 10,000+ people in Iraq had some form od radiation sickness in
the weeks after the war.

Most of the materal was dumped into the Euphredes River, but there is no way to
verify this.

The REAL danger is the Cesium Power Generator the Soviet Union Invented in the
1960's to power radio beacons, telephone repeaters, and other techincal
instruments located in well isolated areas where there was no power. The Soviet
made thousnads of these, and only a handful have been accounted for. (the
records do at evem tell us how many were actually built) The Chechians have
already demosrated they have access to some. The Chechians are also linked to
Al- Quida. in the 1990's, a Russain reproted received a phone call telling him
to go to a local park in Moscow and look under a snow bank at a certain spot.

There was a cesium generator container with a dummy explosive charge attached
to it. Also there were documents stating that the Chechians could and would
make real ones.

These little jewels vary form the size of a coffee can to a siut case and are
so radioactive that it took the Russain Army 35 troops working in 15 sec.
shifts to remove the dummy bomb and place it into a lead lined box.

A private Think tank in England said that even if the smallest of the generator
were used in a bomb in Trafalga Square, it would render about 30% of London so
radioactive that the choice would either be to bulldoze the entire section and
cover it with 3 ft of soil and then build anew, or abandon it completly ala
Chenobol.

>Could he have made them? Certainly, and in the given
>time period. Israel had already blown up ONE Nuclear
>Reactor sold to him by the FRENCH which could have
>produced weapons-grade uranium and plutonium.
>

The french sold the reaqctor to him at the urging of the Reagan Adminstration.
You must know that Saddam was just another two-bit Middle east Thug until the
Reaganites turned into the man he was. And that is why they want to put Reagan
on the Dime!

>Were the UN inspectors stopping him? Not really, but
>for his ordering that the violations he didn't WANT
>found weren't found. He also hid a lot of shit they
>didn't have a clue about.

Once again the "facts" that the US "press" spiels off do not match the truth of
what was found. Tha CIA has issued that there no proof of a active or
mothballed program for either Nuclear, Bio or Chemical Weapons. That the UN
Inspcetion after Gulf War I distroyed his ability to make these (and long range
offensive weapons) and the UN sanctions were effectly preventing him form even
thinking about putting any WMD production back in service.

A little side note: the Source for all Saddam's Biological Germ Stocks? Well
the good old USA of course! Another example of Reagns "genious" that proves he
should be on the Dime!

>And, as far as Saddam's stability: here is a guy who
>invested multiple millions of dollars to build a giant
>CANNON, big enough to throw giant shells all the way
>to Israel. Emplaced in a friggin' mountain! Like some
>sort of funky James Bond villain.

The Cannon was being built by an American, in the open, with the knowledge of
the Reagan/Bush I people. The project was only stopped when the builder was
mysteriously murdered in Europe. (By Isreali Security)

Thsi same guy, once again with US consent, modified the M-109 Paladin SP
Howlazers the US sold Saddam to increase their range. Infact, Saddam M109's
were newer, more modern, and had better accuracy and range then those used by
the US Army in Gulf War I.

>Basically, with the exception of those idiots everywhere
>who would sell him dangerous toys, this guy was aching
>to create a nuclear nightmare somewhere, and everybody
>with common sense knew he had to go.

See my commnets wout his "mentors" above

>(The same with NK and Iran. We'll see. The world can
>no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)

We have fruit cakes right now who have the LAGEST arsenal of WMD' in the world!
And want to build more!

The progam to distoy all US Chemical weapons has been cut back. The newer
Binary weapons made in the Reagan Years will probally not be distroyed.

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>I say this not as a Dean supporter but as an AMERICAN with a MEMORY and
>some CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS.

Customer: "I'd like one Bin Laden please."

Sales clerk: "Sorry- I can't seem to find our Bin Laden right now.

Customer: "But they said Bin Laden was *the* thing to get- and that was last
year! My family will be so disappointed. How about some Anti-American
Terrorist networks then?"

Sales clerk: "Sorry, we're all out of Anti-American Terrorist networks, but I
DO have this great "Saddam in a Hole" on special!

Customer: "What's so special about it?"

Sales clerk- "The marketing!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@nmt.edu>

Reverend Vertigo wrote:
> iDRMRSR wrote:
>
>>George Bush will prolly be the first prez to be re-elected owing solely to
>>some foreign dictator!!!
>
> Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory for Bush & Co.?
<snip>

Because it is a PR victory, a political victory. Symbol, my man *symbol*.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: William Barwell <wbarwell@mungged.mylinuxisp.com>

The thing to remember is, Osama Bin Laden is still out there and it was he
who did the terrorism, not Saddam, whom we aided and abetted.
Unable to lay a finger on Osama, Bush made Saddam the scape goat,
and hoped we would not notice the bait and switch and the fact that
the Iraq war was actually illegal anyway.

And keep pointing that out to the right winger shit monkies.

--
Bush! Chimp or chump?

Cheerful Charlie

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

Osama bin who? Wasn't he the older Jedi in Star Wars Episode I?

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

to a man with a hammer and nails, everything looks like jesus

- polar bear, alt.slack

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>The thing to remember is, Osama Bin Laden is still out there and it was he
>who did the terrorism, not Saddam, whom we aided and abetted.
>Unable to lay a finger on Osama, Bush made Saddam the scape goat,
>and hoped we would not notice the bait and switch and the fact that
>the Iraq war was actually illegal anyway.

What, you think this is true just because you were fed OBL by the great PR
machine prior to the regurgitation of Saddam?

>And keep pointing that out to the right winger shit monkies.

We are all little shit monkies.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Rev. Richard Skull wrote:
> BUT... The Ireali's DO have them and have denied
> the UN Nuclear Inspection Agency access to their
> facilities just like North Korea and Iran have...

But that's the difference. The Israelis *do* have
them. Over 200 of them. Mounted on ballistic
missiles at their Jerico II installation. And on
missiles on submarines.

And once you get them, it's a bugger to get you to
give them up. Like it or not, the entire Middle
East cannot successfully conquer Israel any more.
A fact which really burns their Arabic buns.

Now, if *only* Israel has them, no problem. But
if an Arabic country gets them--brinksmanship.

--
"When I'm president, we'll have executive
orders to overcome any wrong thing the
Supreme Court does tomorrow or any other
day." -- Rep. Dick Gephardt

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

The thing is, by the year 2040, the inevitable proliferation of
nuclear knowledge is going to just continue lowering the bar for
building a nuke until nuclear missiles will be sold in 7-11 next to
the beef jerky. Why do you think all the 7-11 workers are middle
eastern? They know how it's going to turn out.

You can hang up invading countries to keep them from getting the nuke.
The number of countries to invade will grow exponentially over the
decades. Unless we think we can conquer THE WHOLE WORLD, which I
think is beyond even our most rabid far-right extremists, we are just
pissing into the wind. Which will eventually become a hurricane.

We won't be worrying about COUNTRIES getting nukes. We will be
worrying about our NEXT DOOR NEIGHBORS getting drunk, getting in a
family argument, running to 7-11 and getting the nuke. Monday commute
road rage will no longer lead to SHOOTINGS, you will be looking for
MUSHROOM CLOUDS up the freeway. Dumped girlfriends won't be leaving
long angry messages on your answering machine, they'll take out your
whole COUNTY.

And like you say, once somebody gets the nuke, it's a bugger to get
them to give it up. Cops will go up against shotguns or mac-10's but
they don't make a flak jacket that stops nukes. One quick trip to
7-11 and you can be completely beyond the law.

The heavily populated areas will go first, as sooner or later somebody
cracks and pulls the pin on his Honeywell PocketNuke (r). Then pretty
soon only people living miles away from each other will be left alive
at all.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

This isn't right. It isn't even wrong. -- Wolfgang Pauli,
on a paper submitted by a physicist colleague

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>

>>Then pretty
soon only people living miles away from each other will be left alive
at all.
<<

See? Wasn't I telling you to keep your shiny things hidden so the local
predators don't try to grab them? Not only won't you live far apart, but
WalMarts will be quite separated. So, you'll have to sniff your neighbor's
asses to determine if THEY have found a decent food source, follow them on
their foraging, and slaughter them once you've latched on to their food
source.

Well, unless they nuke you first.

Do you really thing Honeywell is going to make consumer nukes, or were you
thinking of HP. Personally, I imagine the shoe companies will market them.
The Nike Nuke or the Adidas Annihilator or something like that.

Why, there will prolly be Modern Nuke magazines where the debate between the
Intel Nuke, the AMD Nuke, and the Apple iNuke will rage on. Prolly be some
kind of Moore's law of nukes, like wait eighteen months and the kilotonage
will double for the money.

I didn't mention the possibility of a Microsoft Personal Nuke. Not that
they didn't try, but they will have been wiped out by an unfortunate bug in
the trigger code. You see, it's perfectly safe to ship defective CODE, but
shipping defective NUKES is quite another thing.

[*]
-----

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH iDRMRSR:
>Why, there will prolly be Modern Nuke magazines where the debate between the
>Intel Nuke, the AMD Nuke, and the Apple iNuke will rage on. Prolly be some
>kind of Moore's law of nukes, like wait eighteen months and the kilotonage
>will double for the money.

Usenet flame wars about which nukes are the best will get more
interesting as people learn to program reverse IP lookup into their
cruise missiles.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

Why so happy to laugh with your mouth shut?
You should laugh like a flower, without a care.
Love that leaps from the soul is not the same thing
As love you hang round your neck by a string.
- Rumi

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Joe Cosby wrote:
> The thing is, by the year 2040, the inevitable
> proliferation of nuclear knowledge is going to
> just continue lowering the bar for building a
> nuke until nuclear missiles will be sold in
> 7-11 next to the beef jerky.

I think the powers that be, agree. So they have
a three part technique to deal with it:

1) An extension of Mutually Assured Destruction.
Sure, you *can* use that nuke against your hated
enemy, but then one of the BIG BOYS will use lots
of air burst neutron bombs over your entire country,
killing all lifeforms. And *your* stuff, which by
and large will be undamaged, *and* your territory,
will be given to your victims as reparations.
In other words: if you use 1 nuke, we use 100.
And your hated enemy wins.

2) We have a defense shield, so even if you lob
one missile at us, we will blow it out of the sky,
and then we will fuck you without vaseline. (That's
pretty verbatim from the executive order.)

3) Any mofo crazy enough to do it anyway we have
to take out NOW. Conventionally, if possible, but
by other means if not. This means NK, Iran, and
anyone else who doesn't understand what the FUCK
a nuclear weapon is, but want to play with them.

I might add that we civilized peoples have been
thinking about this for a long time. As in James
Bond, whose #1 function was to KILL anybody who
fucked around with OUR nuclear weapons, OR offered
to use them imprudently.

--
Anyone with a gun pointed
at you is the government.
--nu-monet

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

>3) Any mofo crazy enough to do it anyway we have
>to take out NOW.

You haven't met my neighbors, I take it.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

If a Bob is pipeless, long-haired, non-Slack-emitting, quoteless, and
not trying to sell anything, we hardly consider that a proper "Bob."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

John Starrett wrote:
> nu-monet v6.0 wrote:
>
> <snip>
> > The world can
> > no longer tolerate fruitcakes who want nukes.)
>
> You talking to me?

"The world" means "fruitcakes who HAVE nukes."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>If Bush were really serious, he would make Isreal distroy its nuclear weapns.
>As the were the real reason Saddma wanted them (and the real reason Iran
>wants
>them)

Bah. If Bush were really serious, he would have been Hitler.

>You must know that Saddam was just another two-bit Middle east Thug until the
>Reaganites turned into the man he was. And that is why they want to put
>Reagan
>on the Dime!

Don't forget Bin Laden. He was just a wannabe too, until we got our hands on
him.

>We have fruit cakes right now who have the LAGEST arsenal of WMD' in the
>world!
>And want to build more!

It's ok to be a fruitcake as long as you're in the right clique.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

I think the powers that be, agree. So they have
a three part technique to deal with it:

2) We have a defense shield, so even if you lob
one missile at us, we will blow it out of the sky,
and then we will fuck you without vaseline. (That's
pretty verbatim from the executive order.)

--
Anyone with a gun pointed
at you is the government.
--nu-monet

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

"nu-monet v6.0" wrote:
> Okay. So let's add it up. And to cut to the chase,
> call them NUCLEAR WEAPONS, because any country with any
> chemical industry and any hospital can make chemical
> and biological weapons.

No, let's not do that. Let's not delete facts just because you don't
have a pat answer for them. "Can" ain't "is." Having the ability to
do something is not the same as doing something. Most people have the
ability to think clearly and draw rational conclusions from
demonstrable fact, but rarely actually do it. As we see here.

> He HAD money. He WANTED Nuclear Weapons. Countries
> were willing and did sell him parts to MAKE Nuclear
> Weapons. His own people were so scared they told him
> they HAD Nuclear Weapons, so he THOUGHT he had them.

How many people can you kill with a bomb you only THINK you have?

> He certainly had radioactive materials and explosives,
> which are all you need to make a RADIATION BOMB. So
> let's further discriminate and say "Not just Nuclear
> Weapons, but FISSION Nuclear Weapons", instead of WMD.

Not just nonexistent Nuclear Weapons, but nonexistent FISSION Nuclear
Weapons, instead of nonexistent WMD. Nobody can kill anybody with a
weapon which DOES NOT EXIST. A thing that does not exist is not a
threat to anyone.

> Could he have made them? Certainly, and in the given
> time period. Israel had already blown up ONE Nuclear
> Reactor sold to him by the FRENCH which could have
> produced weapons-grade uranium and plutonium.

Did he? NO. "Could have" is a thing that DIDN'T HAPPEN. You can't
justify ANYTHING with a thing that didn't happen.

> Were the UN inspectors stopping him? Not really, but
> for his ordering that the violations he didn't WANT
> found weren't found. He also hid a lot of shit they
> didn't have a clue about.

None of which appear to be Nuclear Weapons, FISSION Nuclear Weapons,
or WMD, since those things do not appear to have actually existed.

> And, as far as Saddam's stability: here is a guy who
> invested multiple millions of dollars to build a giant
> CANNON, big enough to throw giant shells all the way
> to Israel. Emplaced in a friggin' mountain! Like some
> sort of funky James Bond villain.

Thus if he had something he didn't have he would have done something
with it. Good argument.

> And he takes every opportunity to try to SCARE the
> world with some of the worst PR ever.
>
> Basically, with the exception of those idiots everywhere
> who would sell him dangerous toys, this guy was aching
> to create a nuclear nightmare somewhere, and everybody
> with common sense knew he had to go.

It's all because of something he didn't do and didn't have the ability
to do but might have done if he had been able to, which he wasn't.
Yes, that's common sense. That's just exactly the kind of common
sense "everybody" tends to have.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

nenslo wrote:
> Let's not delete facts just because you don't
> have a pat answer for them.

Okay, I'll try to explain it in terms even you
might understand.

A police officer has been called to your house
because of a "domestic disturbance" you are
having with your wife. When he arrives, your
wife comes running out of your house yelling,
"He's got a knife!" She is bleeding.

So the cop pulls his gun. When he enters the
house, you throw things at him while yelling,
"I've got a knife! And I'll fucking stab you!"

The cop sees you have your hand behind your back,
so he tells you to "Drop the knife!" You continue
to yell back that "I am going to kill you and that
fucking bitch!" You approach the cop menacingly.

The cop yells out "Drop the knife or I will shoot!"
But you keep coming at him.

Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
shoot you.

And that is a pretty good analogy for Iraq and its
WMDs.

1) The cop didn't actually *see* the knife, so he
shouldn't do anything until he *sees* it.

2) You might have used the knife previously, to cut
your wife, but that doesn't mean you have it *now*.

3) Though you are yelling that you *have* a knife,
the cop shouldn't believe you for some reason.

4) And, last but not least, though you both threaten
to kill the cop and your wife, the cop should see that
you are just funning, and you just need to talk to
a mental health care practitioner and a marriage
counselor and everything will be fine again. Maybe
he should just go away for a while and ignore the
situation.

--
"This hedgehog will live with us!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH nu-monet v6.0
>nenslo wrote:
>> Let's not delete facts just because you don't
>> have a pat answer for them.
>
>Okay, I'll try to explain it in terms even you
>might understand.
>
>A police officer has been called to your house
>because of a "domestic disturbance" you are
>having with your wife. When he arrives, your
>wife comes running out of your house yelling,
>"He's got a knife!" She is bleeding.
>
>So the cop pulls his gun. When he enters the
>house, you throw things at him while yelling,
>"I've got a knife! And I'll fucking stab you!"
>
>The cop sees you have your hand behind your back,
>so he tells you to "Drop the knife!" You continue
>to yell back that "I am going to kill you and that
>fucking bitch!" You approach the cop menacingly.
>
>The cop yells out "Drop the knife or I will shoot!"
>But you keep coming at him.
>
>Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
>actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
>one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
>shoot you.
>
>And that is a pretty good analogy for Iraq and its
>WMDs.
>
>1) The cop didn't actually *see* the knife, so he
>shouldn't do anything until he *sees* it.
>
>2) You might have used the knife previously, to cut
>your wife, but that doesn't mean you have it *now*.
>
>3) Though you are yelling that you *have* a knife,
>the cop shouldn't believe you for some reason.
>
>4) And, last but not least, though you both threaten
>to kill the cop and your wife, the cop should see that
>you are just funning, and you just need to talk to
>a mental health care practitioner and a marriage
>counselor and everything will be fine again. Maybe
>he should just go away for a while and ignore the
>situation.

Except in the case of Iraq, we have only the cop's version of the
story, and he hasn't even presented a convincing claim that either the
wife or the guy who was ventilated ever claimed anyone had a knife.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

We must try to avoid sweeping generalizations unless they're hilarious.
Then, BOMBS AWAY!! Friendlies, enemies, everybody.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Reverend Vertigo <vertigo@nospam.invalid>

nu-monet v6.0 wrote:
> nenslo wrote:
>> Let's not delete facts just because you don't
>> have a pat answer for them.
>
> Okay, I'll try to explain it in terms even you
> might understand.

I know you know argument by analogy is a fallacy, and I know it too.
The only reason I'm bothering is because I'm at work with no work to do
and I'd otherwise be hopelessly bored.

Except this incident happened twelve years ago. The docs patched up
your GSWs and you had the cash to hire a really good attorney. You only
did a few years before being paroled to make room for gray-haired
hippies who were experimenting with applied hydroponics in their basements.

> Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
> actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
> one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
> shoot you.

When this happened twelve years ago, the cop saw you waving it around
for the world to see. Then over a decade later, he came back, up in
your face again.

> And that is a pretty good analogy for Iraq and its
> WMDs.
>
> 1) The cop didn't actually *see* the knife, so he
> shouldn't do anything until he *sees* it.

This time around the cop patted you down and found no weapons. Not
being a fucking idiot, you didn't consent to a cavity search with no
warrant. So I guess you might still have a knife up your ass. The
coroner will be sure to check that out after Officer Vigilance has done
some more high-velocity 9mm exploratory surgery.

> 2) You might have used the knife previously, to cut
> your wife, but that doesn't mean you have it *now*.

Right, you cut her up over a decade ago and did time.

> 3) Though you are yelling that you *have* a knife,
> the cop shouldn't believe you for some reason.

You are yelling that you *don't* have a knife.

> 4) And, last but not least, though you both threaten
> to kill the cop and your wife, the cop should see that
> you are just funning, and you just need to talk to
> a mental health care practitioner and a marriage
> counselor and everything will be fine again. Maybe
> he should just go away for a while and ignore the
> situation.

Or maybe he should fuck off unless he has a warrant, even if you ARE a
despicable flesh sack of putrid poodle shit who deserves to have your
sex organs slowly and messily extracted by a feeble old man with
advanced Parkinson's wielding a red-hot pair of rusty vicegrips, blended
into a pecker-sack-'n-prostate smoothie, and poured down your windpipe
for you to drown in on dry land.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Pastor Fluff wrote:
> Doesn't matter. They'll still just wanna
> talk about Clinton's dick.

That and his dried up old cunt.

--
I don't know what you're talking about.
I've never met you before in my life.
That story sounds like utter bullshit.
I wasn't there and it wasn't me.
I am *not* in denial. Shut up.
--nu-monet

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

nu-monet v6.0 wrote:
> nenslo wrote:
>>
>> Let's not delete facts just because you don't
>> have a pat answer for them.
>
> Okay, I'll try to explain it in terms even you
> might understand.
>
> A police officer has been called to your house
> because of a "domestic disturbance" you are
> having with your wife. When he arrives, your
> wife comes running out of your house yelling,
> "He's got a knife!" She is bleeding.
>
> So the cop pulls his gun. When he enters the
> house, you throw things at him while yelling,
> "I've got a knife! And I'll fucking stab you!"
>
> The cop sees you have your hand behind your back,
> so he tells you to "Drop the knife!" You continue
> to yell back that "I am going to kill you and that
> fucking bitch!" You approach the cop menacingly.
>
> The cop yells out "Drop the knife or I will shoot!"
> But you keep coming at him.
>
> Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
> actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
> one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
> shoot you.

Well like, maybe the man and woman were just
rehearsing for a play. Did the woman have a
script in her hand? Even if the cop saw a knife
it could have been one of those rubber ones or
one of the ones that has a blade that disappears
when you stab someone with it.

--
"There cannot possibly be a god in heaven watching all of this calmly."
-- Revi Shankar

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

Reverend Vertigo <vertigo@nospam.invalid> wrote:
> nu-monet v6.0 wrote:
> > nenslo wrote:
> >>
> >> Let's not delete facts just because you don't
> >> have a pat answer for them.
> >
> > Okay, I'll try to explain it in terms even you
> > might understand.
>
> I know you know argument by analogy is a fallacy, and I know it too.
> The only reason I'm bothering is because I'm at work with no work to do
> and I'd otherwise be hopelessly bored.
>
> > A police officer has been called to your house
> > because of a "domestic disturbance" you are
> > having with your wife. When he arrives, your
> > wife comes running out of your house yelling,
> > "He's got a knife!" She is bleeding.
> >
> > So the cop pulls his gun. When he enters the
> > house, you throw things at him while yelling,
> > "I've got a knife! And I'll fucking stab you!"
> >
> > The cop sees you have your hand behind your back,
> > so he tells you to "Drop the knife!" You continue
> > to yell back that "I am going to kill you and that
> > fucking bitch!" You approach the cop menacingly.
> >
> > The cop yells out "Drop the knife or I will shoot!"
> > But you keep coming at him.
>
> Except this incident happened twelve years ago. The docs patched up
> your GSWs and you had the cash to hire a really good attorney. You only
> did a few years before being paroled to make room for gray-haired
> hippies who were experimenting with applied hydroponics in their
basements.
>
> > Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
> > actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
> > one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
> > shoot you.
>
> When this happened twelve years ago, the cop saw you waving it around
> for the world to see. Then over a decade later, he came back, up in
> your face again.
>
> > And that is a pretty good analogy for Iraq and its
> > WMDs.
> >
> > 1) The cop didn't actually *see* the knife, so he
> > shouldn't do anything until he *sees* it.
>
> This time around the cop patted you down and found no weapons. Not
> being a fucking idiot, you didn't consent to a cavity search with no
> warrant. So I guess you might still have a knife up your ass. The
> coroner will be sure to check that out after Officer Vigilance has done
> some more high-velocity 9mm exploratory surgery.
>
> > 2) You might have used the knife previously, to cut
> > your wife, but that doesn't mean you have it *now*.
>
> Right, you cut her up over a decade ago and did time.
>
> > 3) Though you are yelling that you *have* a knife,
> > the cop shouldn't believe you for some reason.
>
> You are yelling that you *don't* have a knife.
>
> > 4) And, last but not least, though you both threaten
> > to kill the cop and your wife, the cop should see that
> > you are just funning, and you just need to talk to
> > a mental health care practitioner and a marriage
> > counselor and everything will be fine again. Maybe
> > he should just go away for a while and ignore the
> > situation.
>
> Or maybe he should fuck off unless he has a warrant, even if you ARE a
> despicable flesh sack of putrid poodle shit who deserves to have your
> sex organs slowly and messily extracted by a feeble old man with
> advanced Parkinson's wielding a red-hot pair of rusty vicegrips, blended
> into a pecker-sack-'n-prostate smoothie, and poured down your windpipe
> for you to drown in on dry land.

So, in this analogy, if the United States is the 'policeman,' and Iraq is
the abusive husband, I guess my first question would be, who appointed the
United States to the position of policeman, in other words, who vested it
with the authority to shoot sovereign nations in their own homes,
knife-wielding or otherwise?

Dunty Porteous,
Human Sacrifice

--
"As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination.
When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular. "
-Oscar Wilde

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Reverend Vertigo <jhobbs@myrealbox.com>

...hence the bit about fucking off unless he has a warrant. The warrant
is analogous to widespread international approval and support; the court
that issues a warrant is the UN.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Dunter Powries wrote:
> So, in this analogy, if the United States is
> the 'policeman,' and Iraq is the abusive husband...

No. Nenslo is the abusive husband. Mrs. Nenslo
is his abused wife. The cop is Sterno, who is both
armed and willing to shoot Nenslo. Huey is the
next door neighbor who dropped a dime on Nenslo in
the first place. Dr Legume is Nenslo's mental health
counselor, which explains a lot about this deal from
the get go.

And, in the final analysis, it didn't matter that
Nenslo didn't have WsMD in his house. Sterno was
planning to gun him down anyway, if for no other
reason then trolling alt.slack.

--
"Getting shot at was not that bad,
just the getting shot part sucked"
-- U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Villafane

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

But if he DOES makes it out on the lawn, we all get to shoot, too, right?
Then we all turn on Huey?

I want to be the neighbor down the street who has one blue eye and one brown
eye, takes in stray cats, never raises the window blinds, and is still
wearing the same clothes he was wearing when they buried Harry Truman.
Germany, Russia and France are the paper boy, mailman and meter reader,
respectively.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

"You wanna know they rest? Hey!
Buy the rights!
How bizarre."

--Pauly Fuemana "OMC"

--
"In a race between someone
Trying to get me to care
And me not caring,
I would bet on me."
--nu-monet

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: hellpopehuey@subgenius.com (HellPopeHuey)

"nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:
> No. Nenslo is the abusive husband. Mrs. Nenslo
> is his abused wife.

I think you have that backwards. Nenslo is the submissive one at
home. Remember, he recently admitted to wearing an apron. There's your
clue.

HellPope Huey
Dashing through the snow, in a one-horse open ASSHAT

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle,
even though it wasn't mine.
- Rita Rudner

"Mom normally has nothing in her system
but a bottle of vodka and an estrogen pill."
- "Arrested Development"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

"nu-monet v6.0" wrote:
> Dunter Powries wrote:
> > So, in this analogy, if the United States is
> > the 'policeman,' and Iraq is the abusive husband...
>
> No. Nenslo is the abusive husband. Mrs. Nenslo
> is his abused wife. The cop is Sterno, who is both
> armed and willing to shoot Nenslo. Huey is the
> next door neighbor who dropped a dime on Nenslo in
> the first place. Dr Legume is Nenslo's mental health
> counselor, which explains a lot about this deal from
> the get go.
>
> And, in the final analysis, it didn't matter that
> Nenslo didn't have WsMD in his house. Sterno was
> planning to gun him down anyway, if for no other
> reason then trolling alt.slack.

This almost makes me think even you can tell what a stupid mistake
that dopey analogy was in the first place.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: kdetal@aol.com (KD et al)

>A police officer has been called to your house
>because of a "domestic disturbance" you are
>having with your wife. When he arrives, your
>wife comes running out of your house yelling,
>"He's got a knife!" She is bleeding.
>
>So the cop pulls his gun. When he enters the
>house, you throw things at him while yelling,
>"I've got a knife! And I'll fucking stab you!"
>
>The cop sees you have your hand behind your back,
>so he tells you to "Drop the knife!" You continue
>to yell back that "I am going to kill you and that
>fucking bitch!" You approach the cop menacingly.
>
>The cop yells out "Drop the knife or I will shoot!"
>But you keep coming at him.
>
>Now, before he ventilated you, at no time did he
>actually *see* a knife, much less confirm you had
>one or wait until you had swiped it at him to
>shoot you.
>
>And that is a pretty good analogy for Iraq and its
>WMDs.
>
>1) The cop didn't actually *see* the knife, so he
>shouldn't do anything until he *sees* it.
>
>2) You might have used the knife previously, to cut
>your wife, but that doesn't mean you have it *now*.
>
>3) Though you are yelling that you *have* a knife,
>the cop shouldn't believe you for some reason.
>
>4) And, last but not least, though you both threaten
>to kill the cop and your wife, the cop should see that
>you are just funning, and you just need to talk to
>a mental health care practitioner and a marriage
>counselor and everything will be fine again. Maybe
>he should just go away for a while and ignore the
>situation.

You forgot the backhistory. Something like: The police officers precinct
helped you BUY your house a few decades ago and introduced you to your wife.
Then your neighbor started getting pissy and mucking up the neighborhood so the
police officers precinct had lots of guns, knives and gases sent to you to
stock you up for protection. During this time you were beating the hell out of
your wife and children but the police precinct says "fuck the old bag and kids-
just take care of that pissy neighbor! Here, have some more guns."

Hell, I'm too depressed to write any more.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

Yep, once you start making up crazy stories that don't have any
connection with actual facts and say A equals B, it becomes tiresome
and saddening quite rapidly. Let's all agree that nu-monet never had
a leg to stand on and leave it at that.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

Where nu-monet's 'leg' represents the will of the international community,
nu-monet, himself, the righteous wrath and fury of America's brave,
clean-limbed fighting men and women, his nenslo-imposed leglessness the
emasculation of European males owing to the widespread practice of
government-sponsored flouridation of their drinking water, and 'A' and 'B'
are a pair of large-breasted Iraqi school girls taking a shower together?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

No, wrong, see your saying that is like if you went to seven eleven
and said "I want some canned beef, but I DON'T want the brand of
canned beef you carry, I want ANOTHER brand, but I won't buy gas from
you if you don't get the kind of canned beef I want, AND I want you to
stuff pink toilet paper up my ass".

The canned beef is president Bush, the gas is Iraq, the toilet paper
is nu-monet, and the ass is of course nenslo.

See what I mean?

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

"I think that Colombia should be next on the list
because if you think thousands of Americans
will fight hard for oil,
imagine how hard they'd fight for a country full of blow."
- SCOTT THOMPSON

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

nenslo wrote:
> Let's all agree that nu-monet never had
> a leg to stand on and leave it at that.

It took you, what? four responses to come up
with that? Let's all agree that you were so
cowed by my brilliant analogy that you will
be guest starring on an upcoming episode of
'Cops'.

--
"President Bush is a patriot
and a good Christian."
-- Hellpope Huey

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Doktor DynaSoar <targeting@OMCL.mil>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote:
} I am wondering now if it's a GOOD or BAD sign that I first learn this
} sort of news not from The News, but from an iDRMRSR post to alt.slack.

The newsgroup makes a perfect filter for the news. Better than being
exposed to it directly, and the lies are far more entertaining.

} I then went and read the various crowing news stories, but by then I
} was already automatically feeding every sentence through my News
} Translator Brain Filter that turns everything into the Weekly World
} News tabloid sci-fi conspiracy thriller Made-for-TV movie version -- of
} what's already a sci-fi thriller conspiracy news story.
}
} Just another Vitiligo-Dotted Celebrity Dick Story, if you ask me.

Pardon me, Mr. Rev. Stang sir, but I gots me one of them and it ain't
NEVER got me nothin' yet. If you can tell me how to cash in on my
vitiligo spotted dick, I'll gladly cut you in for a percentage.

Of the cash, not the dick.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)

jhobbs sed:
>Why is everyone acting like this is a great victory for Bush & Co.?
>
>WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WMD. WM fucking D!
>
>When they find the WEAPONS OF MASS fucking DESTRUCTION which were SO
>FUCKING CLOSE to being used that we had to go to war NOWNOWNOW without
>waiting for the U.N. to get its shit together (thereby infuriating
>PRETTY MUCH THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD), then and only then will the Bush
>administration be vindicated.

Well, he DID have an AUTOMATIC pistol! Of course, had he actually fired the
thing in such close quarters, he'd never hear a thing again.

>I say this not as a Dean supporter but as an AMERICAN with a MEMORY and
>some CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS.

What good are THOSE items gonna do ya in the New World Odor? Drop'em and
P-raise "Bob".

Is Dean the best the Dems can do? All those guys are SAYING the right things,
more-or-less, but we all know that's not enough to get you elected. Kerry has
zero charisma, and will be far more useful as a senator. Dean is just such a
dork. Wesley Clark looks the least silly to my eyes right now, but given time,
he'll take on the Howdy Doody outlook of yet another Democratic do-not.
Hilary's just gotta step up to the plate, and make it an INTERESTING race, then
they can lose again, but with some kind of dignity. Man, how I yearn for those
olden times, when the president of the United States was busy gettin' laid
every whicha way, rather than making life intolerable for people in other
countries, and unsafe for anyone in the U.S.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)

All-in-all, my nomination for thread of the week! Congratulations to all who
played the game. I laughed, I cried, I peed my pants. What fun!

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Original file name: History is MADE!.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05