SCI-FI FROM STERNO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

From: KILLME@killme.com (Rev. Sternodox)
Date: Tue, Jul 29, 2003

Peter the Great vs. Aquaman

by Rev. Sternodox

One time there was this one guy who pushed the button on this machine he
found and it destroyed the entire universe. Then Wotan, who was shoving
his buttplug in at the moment, saw it and brought everything back by
magic. Then this super demonic reptile guy created a time warp and it
sucked all the black holes into it and killed almost every sentient being
in the universe. Then a scientist who had miraculously escaped destruction
discovered that there were actually over a billion hundred universes but
his evil partner got ahold of the equation and created a bomb that
destroyed every one of the universes. But this other scientist in another
dimension used his new formula (which had to do with putting shit on dicks
and subjecting them to cosmic rays and laser beams and sulfuric acid and
stuff and putting them in his own rectum and then fucking them after
eating/vomiting them) to turn all the destroyed universes of the other
dimension into mirror images of the ones in his dimension so everybody was
brought back and every thing was too. Then Satan started buttfucking a
poodle but the poodle was really the essense of reality and it started a
chain reaction that negated the existence of time itself. Suddenly this
one kid who had been jacking off while the universes were being destroyed
slipped through a discontinuation singularity and was still alive but died
seconds later because he appeared in a remote corner of the anti-universe
that hadn't been destroyed and there wasn't any air there and was a
vacuum. But his cum that squirted out just when he died lived for just
enough time to be swept up in a vast cloud of cosmic awareness that was
sweeping through the anti-sphere where time and space didn't exist. But
this one demi-god got some of the cum in his nose and he threw up because
of it and his vomit became the only matter left in the galaxy. Then the
solar system slipped through a negative zone and became anti-matter but
all the humans were dead so it couldn't kill them. Then every single atom
in every single universe and dimension turned to real runny diarreah and
spewed forth out of this huge robot's asshole that had existed since
before time began. Suddenly everything contracted into a reductionist
discrepancy that proved Euclid's fifth postulate is undecidable. Then the
king of all the gods began buttfucking all the dead humans, but he didn't
realize that the points and lines of Euclidean geometry provide one kind
of extension of the notions of "point" and "line"; the points and lines of
non-Euclidean geometry, another, which caused him to accidently stick his
anti-matter dick into his own throat wound. Then this other guy who always
thought of proteins as programs in the "machine language" of the cell (the
cell itself being the processor) and since cum is mostly made of protein,
he could use the differentiation parameters of unctional fusion to
summarize the subunits of self-replicating neural overlap to buttfuck
himself in the mouth with Wotan's dick. So he did it for all eternity and
this one Sunday school class that has been accidentally brought back to
life had to watch because their eyes were wired open and their heads were
in vices.

The End

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Original file name: SCI-FI FROM STERNO!!#191741.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05