From: "Heart Ignition" <Xcardiacflambe@comcast.netX>
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.slack
Date: Mon, Dec 1, 2003 6:16 PM
An e-mail friend of mine axed me so I thought I'd ask
you salty-sea-dogs...
(Pic Attached)
You could name 10... you could name 1. I chose 7-
7. Nicola Bryant (Peri from Doctor Who)
6. Nicki Cox
5. Audrey Hepburn
4. Rogue (The drawn character from the X-Men)
3. Jolene Blalock (T'Pol from Enterprise)
2. Michelle Trachtenburg (Dawn From Buffy TVS)
1. The Olsen Twins
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From: "Ricky Nielsen" <rickyn@lor.net>
Most any woman of more or less normal configuration(
say ninety to two
hundred pounds)& above the state I am in's age of
consent.Hell I'm in love
with all of 'em.
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "Heart Ignition" <Xcardiacflambe@comcast.netX>
I hear ya...
It's 16 here in Washington State I believe in case yer ever over this way.
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From: IMBJR <imbjr@imbjr.com>
>
>7. Nicola Bryant (Peri from Doctor Who)
Slobber my dobber o'er Peri.
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "Heart Ignition" <Xcardiacflambe@comcast.netX>
I went to a convention in Chicago about 10 years ago
and got a polaroid of
me sam-itched inbetween her and Sophie Aldred. Unfortunately
we had our
clothes on. Kinda defeats the purpose of a polaroid
cum to think of it.
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: IMBJR <imbjr@imbjr.com>
I've been watching reruns and some of the one-off characters
have been
giving me tree. Nyssa from the Keeper of Tracken - woof!
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "Heart Ignition" <Xcardiacflambe@comcast.netX>
Ha! Nyssa definately...
(Taken from "Terminus")
((Disregard that e-mail))
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From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Re: Who would you fuck?
Could you be more specific? I mean, it's sort
of situational.
Like,
Would you fuck them in a boat?
Would you fuck them with a goat?
Would you fuck them with your willy?
Would you fuck them, silly-billy?
Yes, I would like green eggs on them.
But that's just me.
--
Rev. nu-monet
Founder and High Priest
Church of Kali, U.S.A. (Reformed)
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From: "Heart Ignition" <Xcardiacflambe@comcast.netX>
You are right of course. Not given the right situation
most subgenii would
fuck anything, including that nice bumpy potah-toe,
with the little poohtata
hairs growing out, on my windowsill there. Yes, the
one winking at me.
Luring me with it's cute wittle potato-like pota song.
Excuse me for a
moment...
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From: "Revi Shankar" <me@privacy.net>
This one?
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/17/
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Okay, so here's a hypothetical situation:
You are locked in a room with a strong door. She
is dressed like a cheerleader and you have snorked
down half a dozen Viagra the optimum time ago.
You have both been drinking lots of sloe gin. Your
inhibitions are completely gone.
The stereo is playing Marvin Gaye.
Her terrified and upset parents are on the outside
banging on the door with the Sheriff, who plans to
haul you away to serve a LIFE SENTENCE on a chain
gang or electric chair or something.
You both know GOD will punish you for this.
You have ALMOST hit your all time high score on
your favorite video game, and you have a bunch of
men left.
You (main) penis is so erect its broken through
the foreskin. And you've been circumsized.
You testicles are twice their normal size and
throbbing.
She has just told you she is a virgin, but she
knows MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE that she wants you,
NOW. Her female odor is clouding your mind beyond
lust.
There is a least a PINT of semen in retention and
it ain't gonna wait.
Blood vessels are already starting to break in your
brain from the stress. But it's a *good* sort of
stress.
She is so warmed up that she's starting to squeak.
There isn't a condom within 20 miles.
--
"HERE LIES NU-MONET.
GOT TRIPLE HIS MONEY BACK."
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: Selfs Layer <SelfsLayer@reflectionsdivide.com>
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.slack
Date: Tue, Dec 2, 2003 2:13 PM
Message-ID: <1cf85d294a3f1601d66d5f5b3075fdd9@news.teranews.com>
On Tue, 02 Dec 2003 09:32:28 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> quipped and warbled and
generally subthunked:
>You both know GOD will punish you for this.
Aha! Will he punish me with sex? Or punish *her* with
sex and let me
videotape it (and send it to a.b.s, of course, my little
brothers)? On
punish us with double-edged dildo-sex with the Brooklyn
bRIDGE? Thanks
for being more specific though... really gets my blood
gushing...
>You have ALMOST hit your all time high score on
>your favorite video game, and you have a bunch of
>men left.
Well damn, this is no contest!
Play on, baddaboy!
- Saigneur Selfs Layer, KKP, the dude at the door who
acts really poor
(and who wouldn't know you if you stuck a firecracker
up his bum on Bastille Day)
Le Pape of all Fried Freedom and Little Pink Panty Inspector
http://www.reflectionsdivide.com
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
No condom! No problem! I've got a vasectomy and every
disease this side of
the N# Galaxy!
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: Mister Dandy <werp@werp.com>
0. My teenage friend / love / lust / obsession, Julie
L. As soon as
my time machine is complete, I will go back and avoid
fucking up our
relationship. We will live happily ever after.
1. Thora Birch
2. Gillian Anderson
3. Nicole Kidman
4. Isabella Roselini
5. Naomi Campbell
6. Norma Shearer
7. Marlene Dietrich
8. Karen Elson
9. Bijou Philips
10. Drew Barrymore
11. Juliette Lewis
12. about 60% of all Japanese women ages 17 to 49 or
so.
13. just about everyone who would give me the chance
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: ridetheory <ridetheory@notmail.com>
I had a bee-ooo-tiful girlfriend once, and was in utter
misery for about two
years, and then afterwards, the misery had a half-life.
Therefore, from
that day to this, I have preferred unconventional beauty.
IE: Allison Janney.
iggy topo
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
I had a beautiful girlfriend once, and not only
that but she was smart and had money. We got
along great, with dynamite sex, and everybody
thought we would be a great couple. So I ripped
her off and dumped her.
She was emotionally devastated, and more so
after I banged her sister. But what really got
to her was that I never would tell her why I
left. Her stalking got lots of other girls
interested, hoping I would be a bastard to them,
too. But I had too much shit to do. Like write
shit on USENET.
--
"Money can't buy you happiness,
but when you're poor, you can't
buy shit, and nobody will loan
you happiness."
--nu-monet
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
"Unconventional beauty." Eh-eh-eh.... EH-eh-eh....
I've half a mind to post some of the more extreme and
outlandish
amateur photography I've gleaned off another newsgroup...
not plug
porn, no; IF ONLY it WERE but PLUG or even BUG porn...
I'be HALF a mind
to post it... but THIS... "unconventional beauty"...
oh YEAH, I can
show you boys some "UNCONVENTIONAL BEAUTY".
But, honestly, I'm afraid it would change the very nature
of this
newsgroup for the worse! There are other places more
suitable for
this... this FREAK SHOW... that I have in mind, than
our illustrious
newsgroup, and its sacred bank of skillfully rendered,
nobly-intended
Dobbsheads and ConnieFaces.
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Subject: Re: Who would you fuck?
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
You know, the more I think about it... you are opening
a real Pandora's
Box by asking that question on alt.binaries.slack.
I'm not sure we want to KNOW what some of us... (gulp)
*WOULD* fuck.
Especially given certain CONDITIONS.
The speculative nature of this whole subject matter
is starting to
bedevil me. Damn you for distracting an old preacher
from his
Dobbs-given work. But I have an idea. A very very BAD
idea.
--
PRABOB
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