Postcards from the edge

From: Cardinal Vertigo <vertigo@alexandria.cc>
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2004

From the letters to the editor of a regional newspaper:

God says that a marriage shall be the union of one man and one woman.
Anyone who thinks differently is either a fool or brain dead. God hates
the act of homosexuality. Romans Chapter 1, verses 18-32. This should
not be a debated issue.

June Noble, Walnut Grove

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From: "nu-monet v7.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Look, grant them that their god *does* hate and
destroy. Other than giving them endless rules,
that's ALL their god ever did. Their god is no
different than one of the Aztec gods, or the god
of the Moslems who say he wants to kill Xtians.

Invisible monsters, the lot. So, ask them if they
want to live in a world where the gods don't ask
their followers to hate and destroy, like they do.

If they like hate and destruction, then they should
go hate and destroy those who hate and want to
destroy them. They should be happy together. But
they should leave those who don't want to hate and
destroy alone.

Trouble is, this type prefer to pick on those who
don't fight back. I guess you can do that when your
god is on your side.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Kevin Cunningham" <smskjd@mindspring.com>

Ok, sorry to make this point but what type doesn't prefer to kick people who
don't fight back? I personally would vastly prefer to kick a pink in a
wheel chair. Gosh, I might walk across town to punch out an armless person,
male or female. Hitting people who can hit back or even prefer to hit back
is no fun.

Rev. Dr. Junior Mints
Anti-Pope of Atlanta

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v7.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

An interesting dichotomy: violence and meanness.

A truly violent person uses violence of action as an
end in itself, as a catalyst for change. They do not
seem to inflict pain or suffering for any other reason
than change. For example, a violent policeman wants to
stop two people from fighting--not to inflict injury on
them, but to get them to stop.

A mean person is far less interested in accomplishing
a goal then to inflict pain and suffering in the way.
They have an ulterior motive for their actions, and are
less interested in the end than in the means. A mean
policeman might let two people fight a while, if they
are hurting each other; or he might jump in, wailing
away, and hoping to hurt one, the other, or both of them.

People who are raised with a sense of fairness and respect
tend towards violence, with only a minority being mean.
People who are raised around abusiveness, dominance and
submission, and a sense of victimhood and defeat tend to
become mean, with a few keeping their violent edge.

Violent societies tend towards "barbarism", that is,
individual liberties and responsibilities, avoidance of
government, self-reliance, optimism and fair play.

Mean societies tend towards "collectivism", and seek
protection from each other through government, bureaucratic
rules, and are generally pessimistic and stoical. They
are nations that have in past been through many wars and
been defeated and abused by the victors. This is why
there are more of them.

But back to your statement: violent people do not care
how able others are to fight back--they will fight for
their ends. Mean people prefer to pick on those who are
easiest, or who they think are easiest, to pick on.

Like fundies like to pick on homosexuals.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: beefjerkyisgood@hotmail.com (Paul Casino)

Cardinal Vertigo and I were using the "mindspeak"....
> God says that a marriage shall be the union of one man and one woman.
> Anyone who thinks differently is either a fool or brain dead. God hates
> the act of homosexuality.

First of all, GOD MADE HOMOSEXUALS. I've heard people say "No, they
decide to be homosexual." Who the hell in their right minds would EVER
decide to be a (unfortunately) social pariah and the target of
rednecks with trucks? Ask any gay person and they'll tell you "I don't
want this. I didn't choose this. If I could be heterosexual and normal
I would, not that I'm not proud of WHAT I AM." I've heard people say
"Oh, it's trendy nowadays to be gay." I say "HEY! Wearing clothes from
Abercrombie and Fitch is trendy. This is a COCK up my ASS! Nobody
would want to do that if they didn't have a DAMN GOOD REASON."S

Secondly,

>Romans Chapter 1,verses 18-32

FINE. Let's actually LOOK, shall we? (I swear, Bible Thumpers don't
think we're going to check up on them. They just think that a sign
with a book of the bible written on it, a number, a colon, and some
other numbers and perhaps a dash is justification enough to do
whatever.)
----------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the
godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their
wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them,
because God has made it plain to them.
----------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Okay, so God ain't happy about people telling lies in his name. Fine.
And irony. Go on...
-----------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his
eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being
understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.
-----------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Alright, God doesn't get how people are listening to these liars, the
proof is all around them. Good so far...
-----------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave
thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish
hearts were darkened.
-----------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Okay, so they were stupid.
-----------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the
glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and
birds and animals and reptiles.
------------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Same shit, diferent words. Much like alt.slack, come to think of it...
------------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to
sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.
They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served
created things rather than the Creator--who is forever praised. Amen.
-------------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Blah, blah, blah. Next one is the important one.
-------------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their
women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way
the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed
with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men,
and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.
--------------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Okay, here we go. (Man, why not just quote this part and sve me the
trouble of cutting and pasting and you the trouble of reading it? But
they quoted the whole thing and we have to look at the whole thing.)
What we're talking about is a place where EVERYONE AND THEIR BROTHER
IS GAY, AND THEY FUCK ALL THE TIME. This is the key, that the FUCK ALL
THE TIME. If EVERYONE is gay, then procreation goes out the window.
Nobody wants that, sure. And note, God also said he "gave them over to
shamefull lusts" which means he said "Fuck it, do whatever." And it
never states what these "indecent acts" are, until we hit the later
paragrah.
---------------------------
BIBLE SEZ:
Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the
knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what
ought not to be done. They have become filled with every kind of
wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder,
strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters,
insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they
disobey their parents; they are senseless, faithless, heartless,
ruthless. Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do
such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very
things but also approve of those who practice them.
----------------------------
PAUL CASINO SEZ:
Ah, HA! God seems to hate them because they are full of envy, murder,
strife, blah, blah, blah, blooh. (Although the ONLY part I happen to
slightly agree with is the part about them being gossips, because them
fruits are chatty as fuck. You want dirt on a person, go to their gay
friend. These people know EVERYTHING.) Anyway, note it never says that
they're assholes BECAUSE they're gay, it says they're assholes AND
gay. And it's a known fact that God hates assholes. And also, it's
JUST THESE PEOPLE HE'S TALKING ABOUT, not ALL gays. If it would have
meant all gays, it would have SAID ALL GAYS. And furthermore, the book
of the bible ROMANS (and most of the new testament, for that matter.)
was really nothing more than an op ed piece that made it into the big
book, kind of like one of these postings making it into the Stark Fist
magazine. No, EXACTLY LIKE one of these postings making it into the
Stark Fist magazine. And although the SubGeniuses have a rule that
whatever a SubGenius says automatically becomes sacred and holy and
part of the doctorine, Christians have no such rule, thank "Bob"!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Llama Wishfart Rinpoche <free@your.butt>

Paul Casino wrote:
<snipped>

These are good arguments, but who are you trying to convince, Paul? I've
yet to encounter a SubG that had a real problem with homos. Shit, at
least crosspost it to alt.christian.religion or something.

--
The Slack that can be explained is not the eternal Slack.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Cardinal Vertigo <vertigo@alexandria.cc>

Or send it to June Noble of Walnut Grove. I'm sure she's not hard to find.

--
"Read no history: nothing but biography, for that is life without
theory."
- Benjamin Disraeli

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

You know, it's pointless to argue with superstitious people.
Science has proven that "Bob" will happily fuck hetero- or
homo- or lesbo- or even pluggo-sexuals. In the eyes of "Bob"
we're all equally juicy fuck meat. But will those superstitious
idolaters ever drop their slacks for "Bob"? Will those idolaters
ever send in THEIR dollars to the greatest dollar-eater ever?

You'd sooner find a turnip with a stigmata.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "phapp phapp" <pbores0000@hotmail.remnospam.com>

"Cardinal Vertigo" <vertigo@alexandria.cc> wrote:
> God says that a marriage shall be the union of one man and one woman.
> Anyone who thinks differently is either a fool or brain dead. God hates
> the act of homosexuality. Romans Chapter 1, verses 18-32. This should
> not be a debated issue.
>
> June Noble, Walnut Grove

Is that why his xian brownshirts in the Bush Administration
and at the local resident fundie church on the corner always seem
to take great delight in fucking everyone up their asschute
in new creative ways.....?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: beefjerkyisgood@hotmail.com (Paul Casino)

There was a piece of shit movie that I was made to suffer through
called "That Darn Punk!" It was terrible, but it did have a great bit
in it that I think applies here...

GUY ONE: We're gonna kick the shit out of you!

GUY TWO: Yeah, and then we're gonna fuck ya!

GUY ONE: Yea...what?

GUY TWO: I'm gonna butfuck him.

GUY ONE: You're gay?

GUY TWO: No.

GUY ONE: But you said...

GUY TWO: No, no, no, no, no. I'M the one DOING the fucking. HE'S the
one GETTING fucked.

GUY ONE: Still gay!

GUY TWO: You're not listening. DOING the fucking is less gay than
GETTING fucked. Getting fucked is gay as shit.

I think that applies here. DOING to fucking is GREAT, I love being on
the side DOING the fucking, but getting fucked sucks.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com>

Cardinal Vertigo wrote:
> From the letters to the editor of a regional newspaper:
>
> God says that a marriage shall be the union of one man and one woman.
> Anyone who thinks differently is either a fool or brain dead. God hates
> the act of homosexuality. Romans Chapter 1, verses 18-32. This should
> not be a debated issue.

That's the same god that says adulterers must be publicly executed by
having rocks thrown at them until they die. All in all a SHITTY god.


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