dumbass

From: spiffy <thatsright@excite.com>
Date: Mon, Aug 16, 2004

goddamn, i'm such a complete dumbass...you have no idea. Really.
Dumbass is an understatement. If you only knew what a fucking royal
dumbshit i am, you would berate me mercilessly.
How fate allowed me to be in the company of such a beautiful woman
tonight i will never know... there must have been some kind of slip up
in the heavenlies. However, the fates have nothing to fear, for in my
insane stupidity and stunning lameness, I managed to cover their
mistake. Oh my god, if you only knew what a GODDAMN IDIOT I AM!!!!!!
If anyone out there has a baseball bat handy and a good strong swing,
please do me a favor and BASH MY FUCKING SKULL IN. Bash it right the
fuck in. Good lord, there is no reason for my existence. None.
She is an angel. A gorgeous Navajo woman with the most amazing eyes
and a body like you would not believe. And there she was ... WITH
ME!!!!??!??!?!?!!!?!?!?! WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?! There's a line of GQ
studs with money and cars and whatever she could be spending her time
with tonight, but she was with me.... AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LAME
AND STUPID AND BORING I WAS!!!!!!!!!!!! There was my one in a
million... right there tonight.... and she was telling me about an
indian word and how it means the sunset's reflections on the ripples
of the water... and it made me drunk just to listen to her speak, it
was a LIVING DREAM...
I've seen some of the guys she goes out with... and i assure you i
don't rate well against them. Ah fuck it, there's a reason my life
sucks as bad as it does... and the reason is ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
The stupid Yeti fuckwit somehow convinced an angel to go out with him
tonight and then BLEW IT!!!!!

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From: Zapanas <http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl>

If it's any help to you, I did something very similar tonight.

Three women, completely out of my dream life. Gorgeous, funny, wicked
fearless. And something about the look in my eyes just flashed sparks
and fire and magic and intrigue in the air and they were fascinated.
And that was the whole reason they were out, they were looking for
trouble, and I was more than happy to be it.

I can't even go into how I blew it. It's just too pathetic. Suffice
to say.

I do it a lot. I relate to what you're saying, about being utterly
charmed by what they are saying and somehow completely failing to be
outside what you are thinking inside.

It's like, it just seems like if I said what was actually on my mind,
it would be too much. It's like, if it were me, I would have -wanted-
to just say "it makes me drunk to listen to you speak". But it seems
like TOO MUCH.

So then what? I end up saying "ERM GOLLY GEE, DO YA COME HERE OFTEN?"

And it's like WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT? AND WHY?

Well, just because one is a manic depressive, doesn't mean one doesn't
suck.

:^)

)no that's just a joke, don't freak out.)

--
Zapanas
Grand Master of the Satanic Conspiracy
http://joecosby.com/
They talk and talk and talk about how important it is to -encourage-
your creativity but then the second you show some it's BANGO here come
the anti-psychotics and restraints.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

There are three things that your story tells me:

1: Attractive women are in fact attracted to you.

2: Your belief is that 1 is not true, which causes
you to unconsciously force 1 to be untrue in order
to be in keeping with your beliefs about yourself.

3: YOU'RE A DUMBASS!

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Original file name: dumbass.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05