A MESSAGE FROM DR. HAL

From: reverendmack@hotmail.com (Rev. Mack)
Date: Wed, Mar 24, 2004

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgeniusNOSPUM.com> wrote:
> FORWARDED
>
> A MESSAGE FROM DR. HAL
> "Ask Dr. Hal" to present The Tale of Rapunzel
ask Burrough's friend
>
> [This is also the day, incidentally, when, in 1973, Lou Reed was
> attacked on stage in Buffalo, N.Y. by an incoherent, screaming "fan"
> who shouted "LEATHER!" and bit him severely on the left buttock. Well!
> Although the Dr. Hal show is appreciative of audience enthusiasm, we
> don't condone such demonstrations, no matter how supposedly supportive.
> Just fling a few rose petals.]

that guy with the scissors and little scraps of paper everywhere

This guy can really write! How did he get a SubGenius membership?
He's too smart. Hey, well I think they let ANYONE with 30 bucks
into this club! How smart is that? Yeah. SubGenius. But you attract
genius....geniuses...clever and talented....SUBVERSIVES!

Oh, my god...it's a conspiracy!

They can't admit they are smart. It's not "smart" to talk about it.
Obviously, I belong here according to the *name* of this cabal.

Hmmm. Is it a plot to run people off the land? Nope. Done already.
Is it a plot to turn everyone's brains to mush? Not likely.
The pain of "not getting it" makes most of them sharp as tacks.
Is it plot to ruin our children? As far as all of our government
researchers can find out, it is an extremely amazingly good alternate
to what most people call "real". Look at the world. Look at CNN. Yep,
that's reality. Well, it sucks and how does anyone make a difference?

Hey, well why not start an alternate set of beliefs that are designed
to open minds and encourage creativity? Hell, it's a work of art, this
joke religion. It's a thing of beauty.

Wait. Where was I? Oh, yeah. Is it a Communist plot? Oh, jeez. That's not
on any more. Is it a Terrierorist plot? Oh, for crying out loud!
OF COURSE NOT! All they care about is tits and flying saucers and this
kif or whatnot. They laugh a lot. It's best not to take it personally
because it's hard to find out what planet etc.

Well, that's about it from the XYZ.
your friendly archivist

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" wrote:
> "Rapunzel" is one of the most interesting of the short films
> Harryhausen produced for Bailey Films in the Fifties after animating
> the famous giant gorilla, Mighty Joe Young (forget the recent Charlize
> Theron/Bill Paxton CGI remake)

There is no such thing as a "bad" giant gorilla movie. Any giant
gorilla movie is better than no giant gorilla movie. Even "King Kong Escapes."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: hellpopehuey@subgenius.com (HellPopeHuey)

Oh, shove it, you old coot. Any school child knows "Black Scorpion"
rocks harder than "King Kong Escapes" and FAR harder than "The Three
Stooges Meet Hedorah." Your rapidly increasing enfeeblement is
destroying your judgement so fast, I can hear the breeze whistling
through Portland from all the way over here. Of all the colossal
impudence.

HellPope Huey
You can't really play "Purple Haze" on a piano

"Zappa should be most proud that the PMRC
wants to put their obscene lyrics sticker
on his "Jazz From Hell"...
which is an instrumental album."
- Tony Shepps

"Have you ever heard of the Emancipation Proclamation?"
"I don't listen to hip-hop."
- "South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com>

HellPopeHuey wrote:
> Oh, shove it, you old coot. Any school child knows "Black Scorpion"
> rocks harder than "King Kong Escapes"

The NON ROCKINGNESS of King Kong Escapes is what totally rules about it,
and impressed even Baby Nenslo when he saw it fresh out of the can at a
saturday matinee double feature with that whatchacallit city beneath the
sea movie. That's what really amazes me about you guys sometimes. It
seems like sometimes you only have one procrustean standard and every
movie must be forced to fit it or it sucks and has to be mocked. Every
movie has its own little personality and its own form of greatness.
Stang was just talking about how he had to mock and ridicule Space 1999
for being what he called "bad" - yet it is those very qualities, and
their intensity and concentration, which is the greatness of the show.
It's like if every food had to be judged by how nearly it resembles the
one specific dish you personally consider to be the one greatest type of
food and everything else is "bad."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: polar bear <bear@pole.com>

CHEESEBURGER!!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: reverendmack@hotmail.com (Rev. Mack)

Anyone ever see The Poppy is Also a Flower?
How it this for bad? In the very beginning,
this lady is talking to us about the poppy
and how opium, cocaine and heroin are all
made from this poppy plant.

Hold the phone. Cocaine from poppies?

Then they mention how the United Nations is
going worldwide to eradicate this scourge...
about ten times during the opening actions
which take place in Iran and are highly comical.
The United Nations secret agents plant radioactive
stuff ("Don't get that on your hands.") in the
opium and track it through the desert until....
the bad guys foil them with.....a helicopter!
Then we get a boat and a train the end.

I wonder what years George Bush was at the UN.
Somebody wrote that this movie, The Poppy is Also a Flower,
was Howard Hughes's favorite movie and he watched it
over and over. But I think that this is made up, or
he enjoyed the joke over and over.

I think this makes a good double feature with Moving With Nancy.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: hellpopehuey@subgenius.com (HellPopeHuey)

nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com> wrote:
> The NON ROCKINGNESS of King Kong Escapes is what totally rules about it,
> and impressed even Baby Nenslo when he saw it fresh out of the can at a
> saturday matinee double feature with that whatchacallit city beneath the
> sea movie. That's what really amazes me about you guys sometimes. It
> seems like sometimes you only have one procrustean standard and every
> movie must be forced to fit it or it sucks and has to be mocked. Every
> movie has its own little personality and its own form of greatness.

Heh, entirely true. "Funny," but with the recent burst of excitement
about downloading so many things, old and new, has come a
corresponding expression of disappointment or disapproval concerning
the content. NO ONE seemed to like that HULK movie, but I liked it
well enough; it was a glorious failure with some very good aspects. I
understand just what you mean about the root hoo-hah of a work. It
seems to me that the means to do great things came along at about the
same time as the ennui that too often negates it.

While there are a few things I have not seen that draw some mild
interest, such as the Spaulding Gray goods, I find that what I can
access at a not-at-all-bad video store doesn't exactly send me into
orbit that often. I DO appreciate and enjoy a lot of it, but I also
find the process of gauging the shifts from bad to worse tedious. I
get enough exercise of the passivity gland from being HERE without
adding to it with a bid to acquire a huge stash of DVDs like a crow
hoarding shiny beads. The last thing I'd want to do is watch a $#@!
screen with a pal I see all too rarely. Life is dehumanizing &
distancing enough.

I've seen a sinful MASS of film and I reach the loop-point too
easily, so I puzzle a bit at the excitement. Seems as though the
process of cracking the code of the week for DivX or what have you
fuels the process as much as the end gain. Regardless, you're blowing
it if you do NOT take a thing on its own terms, especially the results
of a huge undertaking like a film.

While I gape and drool at juicy technical accomplishments like any
right-thinking man, I keep coming back to the story-driven goods as
the real winners. Gimme a good script, an even half-well-done
translation of any book or a unique hybrid of some sort and I'm there.
Without that, I simply find myself going back to that grainy bootleg
of Philo drunkenly masturbating and knocking the Pope from his throne
with his high-velocity spew. I keep laughing at that thing, 12 years
later. I am more of a sick bastard than he is; at least it was a
one-shot deal for him, whereas I am stuck in an OCD loop of mental
illness over it. Tsk tsk!

HellPope Huey
"Could you please state that in the form of gibberish?"

"I fed my Anger Monkey a banana this morning
and he's a lot better now."
- "Anger Management"

Its a Fake thing and the Chosen all embrace its Goofiness.
- Rev. KrustyMADfaker

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Doktor DynaSoar <targeting@OMCL.mil>

nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com> wrote:
} There is no such thing as a "bad" giant gorilla movie. Any giant
} gorilla movie is better than no giant gorilla movie. Even "King Kong Escapes."

But there *could* exist giant gorilla movies worse than no giant
gorilla movies:

"Might Joe Hung"
"Gorillas Get The Fist"
"King Schlong"

Up one level
Back to document index

Original file name: Re- A MESSAGE FROM DR. HAL.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05