Another aptitude test

From: modemac@modemac.com (Modemac)
Date: Mon, Mar 1, 2004

ALZHEIMER'S TEST

Count the F's in the following statement:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE-
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIF-
IC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...(see below)

Managed it ? Scroll down only after you have counted
them, okay? Do you think there are three?

How many ? 3?
Wrong, there are 6 !!--no joke.
Read it again.
The reasoning behind is further down.

The brain cannot process "OF".
Incredible or what ? Go back and look again!!
Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is
a genius. Three is normal, four is quite rare.
Send this to your friends-it drives them crazy.

(This is another one of those things that looks as though it's been
modified slightly to freak you out.)

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Dunter Powries" <fech.redcap@spedlin>

Modemac <modemac@modemac.com> wrote:
> Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is
> a genius...

I'M A GENIUS!!!! My mother always said so, but... NO ONE WOULD BELIEVE
HER!!!!

Moral: ANYONE can find SOMETHING that they're good at if they can only
manage to live long enough!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

ALSO SPRACH Modemac:

ha. I got 4 so I'm quite rare but sub-genius.

>(This is another one of those things that looks as though it's been
>modified slightly to freak you out.)

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." - Rich Cook

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Modemac wrote:
>
> TOURETTE'S TEST
>
> Count the F's in the following statement:
>
> FINISHED FUCKING FILES ARE THE
> FUCKING RESULT OF FUCKING YEARS
> OF FUCKING SCIENTIFIC FUCKING
> STUDY FUCKING COMBINED WITH THE
> FUCKING EXPERIENCE OF FUCKING YEARS
> ...(see fucking below)

I see a bunch.

--
"YOU FUCKING BELONG TO US NOW!"
"GET DOWN WITH MY FUCKING SICKNESS!!"

--Kino Fucking Beman, fucking brand name

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)

Modemac sent us on a wild goose chase:
>ALZHEIMER'S TEST
>
>Count the F's in the following statement:

Pretty freaky! But it's mislabelled - both my Mom and my Mom-in-law are in
homes with Alzheimer's disease, and this kind of stuff is just not relevant to
them. Where this does apply, however, is in the field of literacy (and PriMate
is the executive director of the West Qubec Literacy Council). Many people who
can't read and/or write well enough for today's hyper-literate world, are that
way because of a quirk in their perception wiring. Imagine if EVERYTHING you
tried to read were awkwardly formatted as is the example - or if your brain
isisted upon focussing on the spaces between the letters, rather than the
letters themselves, or if you saw them backwards or sideways to what the
teachers were telling you was the right way - you and I might be as illiterate,
and ill-suited to function in modern North America, as someone who never
finished grade three. That's not even taking into account the Yeti gene, which
often manifests by making otherwise workable hardware go wacky on us.

=================================================
"I agree with this post." - Dobbs Biddley

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Modemac <modemac@modemac.com> wrote:
> ALZHEIMER'S TEST
>
> Count the F's in the following statement:
>
>
>
> FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE-
> SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIF-
> IC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
> EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...(see below)

"THERE IS NO F." -- the bald-headed child "Bob," trying to impress
everybody with how mystical he was

Incidentally, I've been casting around to see if anyone has heard of a
way to defeat the Alzheimer's pee test. I have a job interview coming
up and, well, you know.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Rev. Ivan Stang wrote:
>
> Incidentally, I've been casting around to see
> if anyone has heard of a way to defeat the
> Alzheimer's pee test. I have a job interview
> coming up and, well, you know.

You gotta quit smoking aluminum cans for a least
a week before the test.

--
"At the sound of the beep you will forget
the first part of this message <beep>."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde" <rabbs@subgenius.com>

You have a WHAT?!?!

--With love, the Rabbs

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>

>>Alzheimer's pee test

Fer Bob's sake, and also that of the poor box, LAY OFF the poppyseed muffins
and bagels!

Oh, BTW, thanks so much for the Quijibo. I been busy with little MRSR,
who's having a run-in (par'n the pun) with one of them intestinal bugs that
skoolkids git. Any day now, I speck I'll be pouring quarts into the throat
of that porcelain excremeditation receptacle. Unless the luck plane tilts
in such a way as I don't get it too.

[*]
-----

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Cardinal Vertigo <jhobbs@myrealbox.com>

Rev. Ivan Stang wrote:
> Incidentally, I've been casting around to see if anyone has heard of a
> way to defeat the Alzheimer's pee test. I have a job interview coming
> up and, well, you know.

I'd tell you, but you wouldn't remember anyway.

--
"In a way, I see posting to alt.slack as being like pitching duck
food into a pond. The ducks may eat it, or they may miss it and a
fish will eat it, or it may just turn into gooey black muck on the
bottom. In any event, the best thing that will occur is either duck
shit, fish shit, or gooey black muck." -- nu-monet v6.0

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Doktor DynaSoar <targeting@OMCL.mil>

Six.

modemac@modemac.com (Modemac) wrote:

} The brain cannot process "OF".
} Incredible or what ? Go back and look again!!
} Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is
} a genius. Three is normal, four is quite rare.
} Send this to your friends-it drives them crazy.

Old copy editor's trick: read it backwards.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

Modemac wrote:
> The brain cannot process "OF".

MAN! That scared the shit of of me!

--
"Please God, help me cleanse the computer of viruses and evil photographs
that disturb and ruin my work ..., so that I shall be able to cleanse
myself." -- Rabbi Shlomo Eliahu

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

Artemia Salina wrote:
> Modemac wrote:
>
>
>> The brain cannot process "OF".
>
> MAN! That scared the shit of of me!

DAMN! I meant to say "scared the shit of of me!"

--
"Please God, help me cleanse the computer of viruses and evil photographs
that disturb and ruin my work ..., so that I shall be able to cleanse
myself." -- Rabbi Shlomo Eliahu

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

*WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH*!!!!!

--
"Please God, help me cleanse the computer of viruses and evil photographs
that disturb and ruin my work ..., so that I shall be able to cleanse
myself." -- Rabbi Shlomo Eliahu

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Doktor DynaSoar <targeting@OMCL.mil>

*snicker*

OK, I turned it off. Try again.

--
Orbital Mind Control Lasers, Inc.: "Honest. Really. Go ahead."

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Original file name: Another aptitude test.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05