From: "Rev. ErRoR" <error@priest.SPAMcom>
Date: Fri, May 21, 2004
It's a long one......
'Bob's Bra and Panties'
ErRoR Report
Saturday 15th May at The Foundry, London
Pope Black's Birthday Bobathon (Transcribed from hazy
recollections
and just plain made up stuff)
Pope Black in his shiny new Papal outfit took to the
stage and made a
popeish announcement. "I am the only Pope in the
world to give out
condoms" He said frisbeeing some shiny foil wrapped
jolly bags into the
excited (and eccentric) crowd. "Not only that,
but I am the only Pope
in the world to give out USED condoms" and reaching
into a glass he
flung soiled prophylactics into the now repulsed crowd
(I think it was
moo milk not man milk). "Not only that" he
hollered "I'm the only Pope
in the world to EAT used condoms" and he dangled
one of the filthy
funbags in his mouth !
Rev. Nobby Styles tutored us in the ways of righteousness
and
dobbfullness spreading the word. Then someone let Charlie
of the
Fighting cocks sound system play his records. Amongst
other things he
got Lawrence of Arabia in there which pleased us geeks
but confused the
young and feckless (Which was probably the point). He
also taught me
how to disarm someone wielding a pistol in 14 easy steps
(although he
made it look like 1) useful info for the end times.
Carl X then took to
the microbe phone and tickled a high proportion of ribs
with his Dobbs
chat (as well as lamenting about running out of Mecca
Cola). Then by
Jingo by Jove someone let Leeeevil play silly buggers
on stage and good
gracious if the man hadn't grown himself a beard. Some
musical penile
manipulation did occur but fortunately I'd nipped off
to the loo while
this happened so I missed it.
Pope Black whipped the crowd into a heady froth with
his foaming
hellfire preaching, delivering an oldie but goodie (though
new to me)
about Ken doll mall zombies. (He told me where he got
it from but I
forget) . Matt got up and gave it some for the Dobbshead
massive,
beaming his highly focused slack laser into the crowd.
He would of
scared the children if there were any there (Someone
has to)! Then his
lowness Pope Black continued the fervour with a ceremonious
head
launching (Well head kicking as I was too lazy to take
the 9 iron)
accompanied by 2 of the sexiest terrorists in the whole
wide world ever
ever. 7 years of good sex was sent and 7 years of good
sex was
received. (If anyone is interested in 7 minutes of average
sex I'm
available for weddings parties but not bar mitzvah's).
Then our regular slot (coz it's ace) Karaoke Dominatrix.
Spankee's : Me
(With badger mask), Mickey Finn and Birthday boy Black.
Spankers :
Médiateur de Plastique, Frau Sexy and Johnny
of the Stud Bunnies. Much
whacking of arses ensued and looking at the 3 of us
it must of been
like hitting the side of a barn. A big bad birthday
bum barn. The
rapturous music was "Living on a prayer" by
Bum Jovi. It was a special
moment as the 3 of us tried to squeeze round a little
table in order to
receive what we so richly deserved. I managed to keep
my pants on coz
it's private ! Pope Black had his papal pee pee tucked
away this time
but his bare ass got a nice thwacking. I dunno what
happened to the
Finn arse I was too busy gettin down to Livin on a prayer.
After the spankathon Pope Black delivered sacred whisky
healing's which
the sordid photo's will reveal that like all good priests
the choir
must receive holy communion ON THEIR KNEE'S. By the
miracle of
transdobbification the whisky magically turned into
divine yellow water
a bit later on.
Then a religious procession ensued as Britisch pigdog
licensing "Laws"
meant we had to clear out and go to another pub. Said
alehouse was
Charlie Wrights and Pope Black and Rev ContraDiction
rode in regal
style on a bicycle rickshaw configuration through the
streets of
London. Arriving in truly royal fashion and decked out
in 100% papal
garb he seemed to scare the shit out of Charlie Wrights
bouncer who
nearly made a run for it (might be something to do with
frisking a
pope?).
Memorable moments at Charlie Wrights : Leeeevil's Mum
hitting on erm,
just about everyone, Black's Birthday bumps, Stud Bunny
impromptu
spankings and a piece of Piss getting in the DJ booth.
For those of you
conscious enough you might of noticed that most (if
not all) the nights
music had a quasi-religious (always wanted to say that)
theme: "Like a
prayer", "Living on prayer", "Say
a little prayer", "Praise you" etc.
Well it were fanfuckintastic as ever and I had a big
happy grin on my
face just like these people: Mark Pawson (seen selling
goodies), Rev
ContraDiction (seen eating and eating and eating and
squeaking and
collecting Church funds), Rev Circlemaker (seen filming
and saving our
forgetful asses), Rev Kev and the Piss crew (seen DJing
and
distributing), Åsa and Gaby (Seen Badgering people),
Claire (Seen
providing Dominatrix utensils), Rev Priest (seen Drinking).
Mystery cow
person with condoms on the udders (seen puking). Jonathan,
Tracey and
the Foundry staff (Seen providing refreshment, radio
and a safe place
to play), Suzanne (Bunyip ?) and Carl X (Seen flying
on a White Horse),
The Fighting Cocks Posse (Seen poppin caps in people's
asses), The Stud
Bunnies (Seen loitering with intent and a steel ruler)
and all those
other lovely people who I've never met/forgotten/met
and then forgotten
and an extra wink for the "Special" people
on 'Bob's' guest list.
From the Pew of Rev ErRoR (Espira made me do it)
3 Galleries of Hot and Sexy Pics:
http://www.lakofbob.com/
ErRoR.