The Afterlife

From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Date: Mon, Nov 3, 2003

The afterlife is the planet used in a science
fiction movie.

1) You get to pick the movie. Then you are
stuck on that planet for eternity.

2) You don't get to be, or hang out with cast
members. They do their own thing. You aren't
part of their plot lines, either. Everything
is otherwise "normal" by the rules of the place.

3) There may be high tech thingies like space
flight, time travel, etc., but you can't use
them. You have to stay on that planet.

4) If there are monsters on the planet that
eat you up and shit you out, you get better and
still survive. If the planet is blown up, you
end up floating, still alive, in space.

5) So which sci-fi movie planet do you want?

--
"YOU BELONG TO US NOW!"
"GET DOWN WITH MY SICKNESS!!"

--Kino Beman, brand name

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From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

Rocky & Bullwinkle!

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From: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)

>5) So which sci-fi movie planet do you want?
>

Satisfiers of Alpha Blue

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

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From: Reverend Vertigo <vertigo@spam.invalid>

Eroticon VI.

--
Dean for America
http://www.deanforamerica.com

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From: IMBJR <imbjr@imbjr.com>

Forbidden Planet, tho as soon as I appear on it, I know I will rue my
decision. The Id Monster was one of the few things on TV/cinema that
genuinely freaked me out.

Still, wandering about the Krell complex would be ...

Durn. Just remembered how it all ends and the second part of Rule 4.
No, perhaps having Lesie Neilson watch me vapourise for all eternity
is not such a good idea. I saw Threads over the weekend and have no
desire to get up close and personal with a nuclear device that can pop
a planet.

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From: "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>

Send me to SOLARIS!

I've lots of dead people who I'd like to see again, and also a number that I
would like to KILL again (and again (and again (and again...

[*]
-----

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From: "Alliekatt" <alleykatzen@hotmail.com>

Doesn't matter, as long as it looks like a Welsh rock quarry.

alliekatt

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From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

THE WILD, WILD PLANET

http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0059914/

Any planet where Massimo Serato is making four-armed clones to
miniaturize Earth's leading scientists, is a NENSLO planet.

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From: Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com>

Planet Earth in "One Million Years B.C."

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060782/

With my technological know-how I could
rule that planet within a month!

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Planet of the Teenage Cavegirls.... OH MY GOD, NO!!!! *IT'S REALLY
EARTH IN THE FUTURE!!*

No really, it would have to be Venus in "Abbot and Costello Go to
Mars". Puppy dogs the size of dinosaurs, landscapes like cheesy
surrealist 1950s sf paperback covers, and an all-female population --
every single one of them 20-something, dumb, miniskirted, and "easy".
At the end of the movie, our two hapless heroes gaze wistfully down
from their rocketship window at a literal "SEA OF PUSSY." I can't for
the life of me remember why they leave Venus.

Oh, yeah... now I remember... the Truth Machine, a helmet that shows if
a man is lying. That's the one serious drawback to that particular
Amazon society.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
PRABOB

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From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

Rev. Ivan Stang <stang@subgenius.com> wrote:
> No really, it would have to be Venus in "Abbot and Costello Go to
> Mars". Puppy dogs the size of dinosaurs, landscapes like cheesy
> surrealist 1950s sf paperback covers, and an all-female population --
> every single one of them 20-something, dumb, miniskirted, and "easy".
> At the end of the movie, our two hapless heroes gaze wistfully down
> from their rocketship window at a literal "SEA OF PUSSY." I can't for
> the life of me remember why they leave Venus.

It was a Three Stooges feature, too, set on the moon. But it turned out the
amazon women wanted to EAT Moe, Larry, and Curly Joe. I wish my woman would
eat ME.

Dunty Porteous,
Human Sacrifice

--
"As for you, my galvanized friend, you want a heart.
You don't know how lucky you are not to have one.
Hearts will never be practical until they can be made
unbreakable."
-The Wizard of Oz

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From: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)

Try pouring something like Hot Sauce or Soy Sauce over yourself.

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

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From: hellpopehuey@subgenius.com (HellPopeHuey)

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote in message news:
> Oh, yeah... now I remember... the Truth Machine, a helmet that shows if
> a man is lying. That's the one serious drawback to that particular Amazon society.

Right, like YOU'D have anything to worry about, or most ANY of us.
It'd just spray sparks and blow the little fins right off the top. Now
NENSLO, he'd be in trouble because he ALWAYS tells the truth. No,
wait, THEY would be the frightened ones because the helmet would say a
MAN was truthful and that would cause them all to PEE MIGHTILY. And
you thought just WOMEN could be lying bitches. Nope, its a
cross-gender FRANCHISE. Sometimes even a cross-dressing one. Remember
that time we caught iceknife in that gingham thong & bra ensemble.
Eeyeeww.

HellPope Huey
...and that's when I woke up
in the middle of the highway
wearing this cape, honest, officer

I take my women the way I take my coffee:
Cold, bitter, and with a fly perched on the rim.
- Artemia Salina

"I can't exploit a divine manifestation!"
"Oh why not? Everybody's doing it."
- "The Simpsons"

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From: "nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

> "Rev. Ivan Stang" worted:
>
> > Oh, yeah... now I remember... the Truth Machine,
> > a helmet that shows if a man is lying. That's the
> > one serious drawback to that particular Amazon
> > society.

Those women must be pretty damn alien, if you ask me.

When was the last time you met a woman who needed to
put a "truth helmet" on you to figure out if she
thought you were lying?

Come to think about it, just because they looked
humanoid, doesn't mean they were. Perhaps on their
planet they reproduced by tearing out the males
gonads and shoving them in their egg compartment or
some unpleasant shit like that.

The men weren't missing, they had gone into hiding.

--
"Money can't buy you happiness,
but when you're poor, you can't
buy shit, and nobody will loan
you happiness."
--nu-monet

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From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)

>5) So which sci-fi movie planet do you want?

The Forbidden Planet, complete with the actress, whose name escapes me at the
moment, who played the scientist's beautiful daughter. And the Krell Mind
Booster, and even the monster from our collective ids.

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From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

Bobdiddley <bobdiddley@aol.com> wrote:
> >5) So which sci-fi movie planet do you want?
>
> The Forbidden Planet, complete with the actress, whose name escapes me at
the
> moment, who played the scientist's beautiful daughter. And the Krell Mind
> Booster, and even the monster from our collective ids.

See androids fighting Brad and Janet,
>>> ANNE FRANCIS <<<< stars in Forbidden Planet,
Wo oh oh oh oh oh,
At the late-night, double-feature picture show.

Dunty Porteous,
Human Sacrifice

--
"Whatever happened to Saturday night?
When you dressed up sharp and you felt alright,
It don't seem the same since cosmic light
Came into my life."
-Eddie

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Anne Francis, who briefly had her own TV show, "Honey West," during the
late 60s spy show craze. Anne Francis. Jeeeeezis Fucking Holy
NGOGNGOGNGOGN, OOHHHHHH yeah. Just another Marilyn clone, sure, but,
STILL.

Bob Didley was the second Sub to say he wants to live on the Forbidden
Planet.

NO THANKS!! That fucking Krell mind-amplifier scares the bejesus out of
me. The very idea! YIKES! Besides, come the Time Intersection, 2178,
all the monsters from all Earth ids will come to rampaging life, says
so right there in What "Bob" Didn't Say. Talk about special effects.

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From: bobdiddley@aol.com (Bobdiddley)

All this time, I thought the point of the movie was that I HAD been living on
the Forbidden Planet. Anne Francis is probably just a figment of my overwrought
and under-experienced id as well. I probably misread the original game rules,
too - it just might say something in there about not getting to do the bonkaroo
with by-now-well-aged former cuties. But hook me up to that Krell machine, and
let the wild rumpus begin! Or alt.slack, whichever is easier to come by...

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From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" wrote:
> NO THANKS!! That fucking Krell mind-amplifier scares the bejesus out of
> me. The very idea! YIKES!

Me too. I can barely handle my id monsters even in the tiny bone box
they are presently in. You definitely do not want to see Earl
Holliman invisibly FUCKED TO DEATH in midair.

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From: "Dunter Powries" <fech@redcap.spedlins>

I would have preferred not to have had the image implanted in my all-too
suggestible brain, either, thank you.

Dunty Porteous,
1959 Recipient of the Prestigious Y-Chromosome Award

--
"The world-powers that rule over all mankind, for good or ill, are
unconscious psychic factors, and it is they that bring consciousness into
being and hence create the sine qua non for the existence of any world at
all."
-Jung

"It tastes like burning....wwwaaaaa!"
-Ralph Wiggum

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Original file name: The Afterlife.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05