Subject: Re: Rap Asimov!

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <3DEEE5F0.DE9A9A1@subgenius.com>, iDRMRSR
<idrmrsr@subgenius.com> wrote:

> Just read today that Will Smith is going to play the lead in the movie
> version of Isaac Asimov's "I Robot". I sure hopes he writes one of them
> cool hip hop rap tunes to go with the classic. Rat on, bro. Ait.
> Gittin jiggy wif da positronic branez.

The lead character is not the robot but an Earthman detective, Bailey,
which I'm GUESSING would be Smith's role. (The implication in the books
is that Bailey is vaguely Jewish.) "I, Robot" is a natural for a movie.
In some ways, it's already been made into a movie dozens of times over.

I just read that ancient crumbling sf novel (from like 1942 or so) and
I recall thinking, Boy, this is almost identical to the modern day
mismatched-cop-buddies-movie formula, what with the serious Jack Webb
or straight man (usually white, but sometimes Danny Glover) coupled
with the goofy, impetuous wild card (usually black, but sometimes Mel
Gibson, or Chinese, if the straight guy is black). Only in this, the
goofy sidekick is a robot and, Spockishly, he's so UN-goofy he's goofy.

I guess it has come full circle so that now, the Jack Webb is black and
the wacky sidekick is a skinjob, who will probably be white. Black
people being so funky and human and all, and white people being so
logical and stern and all, according to Hollywood stereotypes dating
back to Steppin Fetchit.

I doubt that they're casting Will Smith as R. Daneel Olivaw. He's the
one Asimov character who lives through the whole 30,000 year future
gistory series... more of a "Yoda" than the Han Solo stereotype that
one would tend to associate Will Smith with.

I guess there's no reason that Bailey can't be black, but if he's gonna
be that same shufflin,' shuckin,' funky yet nonthreatening dude that
Will Smith usually plays, then I GIVE UP AGAIN.

I have not yet given up on giving up, see.

For that matter, I suppose the R. Daneel could be a robot that looked
like a black person, and Will Smith could play him with the proper
blandness. But somehow I get the feeling it'll just be biz as usual,
and none of the characters will be even remotely like the originals. I
hope I'm wrong.

If it's anywhere as close to the Asimov original as "The Time Machine"
was to the Wells original, I hope no one will mind of I vomit
prodigiously.

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Subject: Re: Rap Asimov!
From: "nu-monet v5.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Rev. Ivan Stang wrote:

> I doubt that they're casting Will Smith as
> R. Daneel Olivaw.

Top Ten Casting Picks to play R.D.O.:

10) Tommy Lee Jones
09) Keanu Reeves
08) Robin Williams
07) Jim Carrey
06) Britney Schpears
05) Jack Nicholson
04) Keith Richards
03) Robert Downey, Jr.
02) Christian Slater
01) Michael Caine

"I know who I am. No one else knows who I am.
If I was a giraffe, and someone said I was a
snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe."
--Richard Gere

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Subject: Re: Rap Asimov!
From: "Paul E. Jamison" <pauljmsn@infi.net>

Hang on, hang on here. R. Daneel and Lije were in "The Caves
of Steel" and "The Naked Sun" (and one or two other books later).
"I, Robot" was the series of linked short stories about robots and the
Three Laws and Susan Calvin and alla that jazz. Or are they making
a Olivaw/Bailey detective movie and calling it "I, Robot"? I'm
confuzzled here.

Either way, a Will Smith rap song about robots sounds like
fine bulldada material.

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Subject: Re: Rap Asimov!
From: "nu-monet v5.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Well, it starts out with Susan Calvin being on
board a spaceship that is attacked by the evil
"Foundation Empire". But before she is captured,
she puts a secret message onto R. Daneel Olivaw
and another robot, kinda a cute furry one called
"Boxy", and they get away in one escape pod, but
the computer on her ship won't let her pod back
on board, so she has to blow explosive bolts in
her pod, get back aboard and deactivate her ship's
computer before she is captured.
Anyway, R. Daneel and Boxy land on this planet
where they have special police to hunt down and
kill androids, because androids are forbidden on
that planet. Well, they get away and land on a
space station that has an old guy with a cute
young girlfriend but the old guy gets killed by
a robot who has the ingrams of some evil guy.
Eventually they get the plans to the captain of
the spaceship The Undertaking and he flies his
ship on the Star Track to attack and destroy the
giant evil Foundation Empire Death Moon.

Will Smith stars as "Boxy"

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Subject: Re: Rap Asimov!
From: "Paul E. Jamison" <pauljmsn@infi.net>

OH, so we're talking about a *Hollywood* project here!
*Now* I understand!

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Original file name: Re- Rap Asimov! - converted on Monday, 21 July 2003, 13:39