What is it about mauldlin memorial ceremonies...

From: Legume <none@yerbiz.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Wed, Sep 11, 2002 3:25 PM

...that attracts Scotsmen? I mean, hey, are these guys worse than lawyers,
or what? First of all, they dress like a bunch of old ladies with no
fashion sense, and they go marching through the streets caterwauling on
those fucking bagpipes, looking for some cop funeral or veteran's memorial
so they can hang around like fucking death stink in their fucking
tablecloth dresses and stupid-looking hats.

And here I turn on the fucking news, and all the fucks are blubbering about
the WTC attack, and here comes a fucking army of these fucking Scotsmen
down the road in their dresses like some faggot-ass off-broadway musical
version of fucking Braveheart, tooting away on their bagpipes playing
Amazing Fucking Grace as if it's some corporate soundtrack to stir sales
and pump up the WTC memorial t-shirt and keychain industry.

If you see one of these fucking Scotsmen, throw a brick or something, chase
him away. If you don't stop these fucking Scotsmen, the terrorists WIN.
Legume
--
"A girl got drunk and balled the dead
and I gave empty sermons to my head"

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Subject: Re: What is it about mauldlin memorial ceremonies...
From: friday@fridayjones.com (Friday Jones)
Newsgroups: alt.slack,alt.friday
Date: Wed, Sep 11, 2002 8:22 PM

Because I was celebrating Get To Work Late Day, I missed the 8:46 AM
"moment of silence" where all the early-birds were supposed to huddle in
their cubicles and not type, or answer their cell phones, for ONE FULL
MINUTE to mourn the dead.

If I had been there, I would have been sooooo tempted to either:
scream piercingly

throw paper airplanes across the cubicle sea.

I feel your pain.
I'll give you a dollar if you let me feel it again.
- HellPope Huey

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From: "Alliekatt" <alleykatzen@hotmail.com>

"Legume" <none@yerbiz.com> wrote in message
news:Xns92869F51B97CBCortezLegume18465086@128.242.171.114...

> If you see one of these fucking Scotsmen, throw a brick or something,
chase
> him away. If you don't stop these fucking Scotsmen, the terrorists WIN.
> Legume

Not only that, but when Scotsmen sit on barstools all regimental and shit,
they leave running sweat prints of their ballsacks on the vinyl. The
halfbreed Anglo-B.O. makes their ballsack prints stink up the place like a
wet chicken's ass dipped in dog piss. If you walk into a bar and a bunch of
Scotsmen are walking out, bring some 409 with you and wipe the seat before
you sit. One of those Scotsmen may weigh 350 pounds and you might be
picking the seat that had nothing between it and his dingleberries.

alliekatt

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Original file name: What is it about mau.txt - converted on Friday, 13 June 2003, 22:43