Subject: More NonLies about Real SubGenii

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sat, Feb 9, 2002 2:24 PM

The notorious West Side Clevelandian SubGenius known as iDRMRSR
(pronounced "Mister Sister" by me) has mentioned his new second pad
over here on the East Side, horrifyingly close to where We/I live, and
also very close to where the barely less notorious Rev. Geo works at
the Emergency Slack Abuse Squad.

Well, we were there last night, and this is my testimony.

First we went to that Mongolian place at Coventry that our fellow
Clevelandian alt.slack.fux recommended. The restaurant is a fine one,
unusually interactive since you mix your own stir fry basically, and
Mister Sister acted perfectly normal -- for Mister Sister -- while we
were there.

It was when we saw his new old condo that we got worried. It's a LONE
NUT CRAZY STALKER-MAN house if ever I saw one -- but not the
obsessive-emergentile kind with eighteen million perfectly cut out
pictures of one woman, or one evil politician, covering every square
inch, and boxes of rotting media. like my house. No, it was the OTHER
kind of lone nut crazy man house -- EMPTY. Like he's ready to flee and
change names (AGAIN, NO DOUBT!!) at a moment's notice. Wei says this is
because he's just moved in and all his decorative stuff is at his other
place. But I know better. There probably IS no other place. But I
digress.

Mister Sister's place is all blank white walls, blank white carpet, a
rudimentary set of kitchen appliances, and...

his "MODULE".

It's this huge chair-room-environment-cybermonster that he's actually
plugged into with tubes! He puts on this weird mask with all these
wires and clear plastic tubes full of some kind of clear gas and while
all this stuff is feeding into him he has this TV SCREEN the size of a
my LIVING ROOM in front of him. But get this -- this screen is like 8
by 10 feet and yet it is just HOVERING IN THE AIR with NO VISIBLE MEANS
OF SUPPORT WHATSOEVER. And it's thinner than a sheet of paper. I mean,
if you stand to one side and look directly at it on edge, it
practically disappears. Well, it DOES completely disappear if you only
look through one eye. I was afraid to touch it because I was afraid it
wouldn't be solid at ALL. I started to ask him about it but he gave me
this look that said, "Maybe you've seen too much already."

Now this giant floating screen -- which, I repeat, has NO WIRES holding
it up and NO LEGS underneath -- can be a TV monitor or a computer
monitor, and Mister Sister's module has this "air keyboard" that
appears hovering before him like a keyboard made of thin neon lines,
only, I don't think they're neon -- it's smoky looking, obviously a
projection of some kind, but filmy looking. Anyway Mister Sister starts
calling up subscreens and some of the time it looks like a plain
Windows interface. But then he's showing me this "CYBER STANG"
reconstruction he's made! I've been working on crappy little 3D "Bob"s
for a long time now but I never saw anything like this. And it looked
just like me, like a photo, but with creepy eyes. And it just started
ranting nonsense. I only saw a little of this before he shut it off,
but I could see before he closed it there was a list of files behind
it, "Legume", "Magdalen," "Sis Dec," various SubGenii. Now I see why he
was asking if I had any pictures of LeMur (no such thing exists on
Earth, to my knowledge; "LeMur" might be a committee of artists for all
we know, like Nenslo turned out to be.))

Mister Sister asked us to stay, but the bizarre reality of this David
Lynch-like world we had been admitted into was just too much, so we
begged out and walked home. Actually we RAn home.

But now, I am wondering... I can't stop thinking... all those "virtual
SubGenii," that floating screen unlike any technology I have ever seen,
those tubes and wires going into that thing on his FACE... my god, what
nameless, formless, amorphous flopping lurking dread is going on in
that little condo down the street??

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: More NonLies about Real SubGenii
From: "Ricky Nielsen" <rickyn@lor.net>

And you say this is going on less than twenty miles from my bunker here in
Lorain?where's my tinfoil hat? I'll bet that is where the "Vibrations" are
coming from. kool. glad ya'll liked the Mongolian place.(it was me that
recomended it not this fux guy)

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: More NonLies about Real SubGenii
From: iDRMRSR <alexithymia@depression.org.east>

>>my god, what nameless, formless, amorphous flopping lurking dread is
going on in
that little condo down the street??

Too bad you could not stay. I would have run some form of visual
entertainment on that screen, and made some microwave popcorn.

But then, you'd probably have noticed that my microwave has a special
setting for Human Bacon.

-----
PS...Remember that scene in Dr. NO where the doctor is apologizing to
Bond for disturbing him with the sight of his mechanical hands injured
in some past experiment?

Well, where the fuck WERE my MANNERS???

I should have apologized to you about that mask and breathing
apparatus. Similar story, but I don't want to get into it now.

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Original file name: More NonLies about Real SubGeni - converted on Monday, 21 July 2003, 13:44