Subject: Subgenius Poll

From: El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Tue, Feb 4, 2003

What elements would you say would be essential to include in a Subgenius musical or Rock Opera? Not that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Cheers,
Queso
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com>

Kevan Smith wrote:
> El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com> wrote:

>>What elements would you say would be essential to include in a Subgenius
>>musical or Rock Opera?

> 10% of all proceeds to Ivan Stang.

Fuck that! If we succeed with what we are planning - we'll give at least half.

Cheers,
Queso
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com> wrote:

>What elements would you say would be essential to include in a Subgenius
>musical or Rock Opera? Not that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Pinks getting vaporized by flying saucers is an obvious must.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com
Last night you were, unhinged.
You were like some desperate, howling demon.
You frightened me. .......... Do it again.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nu-monet v5.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

El Queso wrote:
>
> What elements would you say would be essential to
> include in a Subgenius musical or Rock Opera? Not
> that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Possible Bumpers:

Forgot to Duck?
Excrecitement!
The Horror of Flatulence Retention!
The Zen of Terror
Mutant Revolution and Sin Particles
Psychic Warfare/Welfare
Dream Plagues
Do you have Cancerflu?
Laugh 'Til Your Guts Bleed
Are You Yeti? You Are Yeti!
Medieval Barbarism
Are You Abnormal?
A Ghastly Tale, Drenched with Gouts of Blood!
Toilet Train Your Money Forever!
Utter Humiliation In Seconds
Beyond Satanism
Hundreds of Severed Heads
The Sloppy Second Coming
Think Stupidly--Act Globally
Disintigrate Your Enemies
Stalk, Kill, Eat Human Beings
Do You Urinate?
The Miracle of the Tortilla
Control Friends and Strangers

--
"Proud and insolent youth,
prepare to meet thy doom."
-- Captain Jas. Hook
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com>

Thanks a billion! That is the kind of winceperation /I was lookin for.
Queso/
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: idrmrsr <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>

> El Queso wrote:

>>What elements would you say would be essential to
>>include in a Subgenius musical or Rock Opera? Not
>>that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Tits!

Oh, that and, that one element from the future, 131 I think, that the future guy had the comb made of in that one Twilight Zone episode, or was it Outer Limits? I mean it was element 131, which was unheard of in that day, even though now we make it by the shitload.

[*]
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@subgenius.com>

"El Queso" <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com> wrote

> What elements would you say would be essential to include in a
> Subgenius musical or Rock Opera?

Monkeys. Lots and lots of monkeys. Also, hampants.

--
They are mean because they are rejects from society.
--Bill Palmer on SubGenii
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com>

Monkeys are covered... but HAMPANTS, hot damn, now you're talkin.
Queso

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Geo" <geovoice@earthlink.net>

Flaming Carp, massive, recreational pharmeceutical-induced dancing, and
exploding cheese blintzes...

Or, maybe just a singing frog.

Rev.Geo
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>

Something really surprising and gross happening to Stang. Then he sings a duet with HPH covered in whatever gross happened to him with his whatever surprising happened to him in full view.

Nenslo gets left behind by the saucers a la ET.

numonet gets captured by the pinks who try to give him a loBobomy with dental floss (your wordplay here) and is rescued at the last minute by **Kevan**, completely by accident, whereupon they become lifelong friends.

--
John "your pal, like it or not" Starrett
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

"BOB" -- SLACK -- THE CONSPIRACY -- "FUCK 'EM IF THEY CAN'T TAKE A JOKE." There's the plot outline right there. Everything else is window dressing.

But tits -- humanoid female tits -- would be the most important window dressing, followed by the porno scenes of 6 billion Pinks each being punished for not knowing Slack. Tits are fairly cheap though. The death scene of the billion Pinks you might have to do on the cheap. A topless female character looks out the window and says, or sings rather, "OH MY GOD LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENING OUTSIDE! BILLIONS OF PINKS BEING SLOWLY TORTURED TO DEATH, BY LIFELIKE GIANT ROBOTS, WHO SIMULTANEOUSLY FORCE THEM TO RELIVE MEMORIES OF EVERY OFFENSE EVER COMMITTED AGAINST ANY SUBGENIUS! GOOD THING I HAVE THAT $30 MEMBERSHIP CARD!" etc. I leave it up to you to make that kind of shit rhyme.

Actually El Queso, there does exist a SubGenius Rock Opera, finished and recorded with reasonable slickness jeez, almost a decade ago by now? -- by a Dr. Bizarro. "THE BIG MACHINE." I played the cassette of parts of it many times in past Hours of Slack. About a year ago he indicated he was remastering it to digital so I have been kinda waiting on that.

However, don't let this affect yours. Dr. Bizarro's is very skillfully done and clever enough, but it sounds... very very Zappa-like, so much so that if I were Dr. Bizarro I would fear angering the ghost of Zappa.

I would not be inclined to worry that a rock opera by El Queso would sound derivative of anyone else, judging by the rather unique stylings I have heard thus far from The El Queso All Stars.

Incidentally I got an order for a 7-Bladed Windbreaker that required me to phone the customer. I offered him a free CD because he'd had to wait for the Windbreaker (I was on vacation). He asked me for whichever CD had the most El Queso on it (Bobsongs 3). I guess he's the OTHER Number One El Queso All Stars fan.

It would be great if you could get Philo and Sphinx Drummond to sing on it. They're a regular Flo and Eddie.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com
PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

A SubGenius opera and/or movie should feature a cliff-hanger at the end that's so extreme, so INFINITELY BAD, with EVERY POSSIBLE CONCEIVABLE EXTREME VIOLENT TORTURESOME BAD THING ABOUT TO HAPPEN TO OUR HEROES, I mean, where you layer dire threat upon dire threat way way WAY past the direness of any movie cliffhanger ever before, and then, ten times THAT. There is a Nensletic short story in the last of the giant Stark Fists that has this sense about it, which maybe I can unearth.

I have my own SubGenius Movie notion which I have been adding details
to every time I have a brainstorm about it (not often), for 20 years now. One of these days I should go through those notes and see what I have. It might be that all I need to do is REMOVE 500 pages and I'll have a wonderful script. Just carve away anything that doesn't look like a SubGenius movie.

When John Carradine died, that was a tremondous blow to my original concept. And then when we lost John Agar, hell, I had to change the whole direction of my thinking.

In mine, there's a Good "Bob,"who you never see directly, and a False "Bob,"who you see lots of; a Good Ivan, and an Evil Ivan. (There is one Good-Bad Philo.) The Evil Ivan dies at the hands of "Bob" in the most prolonged death scene ever, and the Good Ivan gets to go back in time and start all over again, differently. (Which is the timestream we happen to be in right now -- the one AFTER/BEFORE the end of that movie idea. (There's my kook contribution for the week. Incidentally, just so you know how truly kooky I am, some of the things I uttered on stage at X-Day 98 just before 7 am July 5 were actually lines from that paerticular potential script, of which the crappy old antique Video 8 footage will tie in beautifully later on, if that particular movie ever gets made. In other words, we have used actual Time Control already by shooting a few lines in 1998 for a future movie that shows *that* alternate 1998. Heck I shot SOME stuff for it in 1973! ("Let's Visit the World of the Future")) There is also a likeable hapless sap of a protagonist who is loosely based on Lonesome Cowboy Dave's personality.

ANY SubGenius movie should end with, instead of the names of the stars and director rolling up onto the final freeze frame as the macho rock ending music comes in, THE SACRED PO O BOX rolling up onto the final freeze frame as the macho rock ending music comes in.

With the idea having been imparted that the Happy Ending will happen, and the Bad Ending be averted, IF YOU GET OFF YOUR ASS, JOIN THE STRUGGLE, AND SEND $30 TO THAT ADDRESS!!

God damn it, I told myself when got up this morning that I wasn't going to write a bunch of blither on the newsgroup. I was gonna go straight to the technical work. But no. You had to go and mention IMAGE OF THE BEAST in that other post. Got me all excited.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: polar bear <bear@pole.com>

El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com> wrote:

> What elements would you say would be essential to include in a Subgenius
> musical or Rock Opera? Not that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Depends on the effect you're aiming for. For safety, I'd use Indian elements. African elements are unpredicable and potentially dangerous.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Err." <x@x.com>

Porn midgets/dwarves

JanusNode also blurted the following:

must the orangutan show things to a puppet? Her exploration hides from
the orator a great many orangutans were created for young arrogant
kings
Why did the chivalrous chiropractor kiss the perpetual neurosurgeon?
Because that perpetual neurosurgeon was soft.
Her palpitation takes things to an early delicacy
my lonely jazz offensive harps long for support from my own saint
do not require things from elves.
You are not most of you
the astrology jams:
a great many father appetites want things from a presidential
candidate...
your unfulfilled dreams is like at least one extravagance.
Hope is your guardian angel.

Janusnode also suggests the following Sub-G Names:

Her royal highness woeful boar
High epopt soft capacity
lady programmable monkey
grunt sarcastic more enduring than realism
Prince darkling
archangel husband
Pope artistic cobra
Master comfortable oxygen
whizmaster conspicuous
High daisy
Her royal highness the laughter of the Gods psychiatrist
Doctor strange more acrobatic than ontology
guru cancerous more absurd than pataphysics
priestette the dying masses atheism
Supreme dagger purify

--
The Reverend Error
Subobscurus Veneficus Ex Trux Turpis Templum
Subservio - Pipe Sucking "Bob" club
http://www.melteyemedia.com/subg/
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: rabbs@subgenius.com (Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde)

El Queso <""the_cheese_23\"@(nospam)yahoo.com> wrote
...
> What elements would you say would be essential to include in a Subgenius
> musical or Rock Opera? Not that anyone would ever do such a thing (wink).

Triumph of the Sex Goddesses, of course! Terribly Wagnerian.

--With love, the Rabbs
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>

YMA SUMAC

Trust me on this one.

Serious.

This stuff is fucking -perfect-.

I mean you have your own material but there is plenty of counterpoint here, see?

Call/response, point/counterpoint.

OK?

Back to document index

Original file name: Subgenius Poll.txt - converted on Friday, 13 June 2003, 22:40