Recipe for SubGenius

From: Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Sep 15, 2002 6:31 AM

3 pints sarcasm
3 lbs. cynicism
4 lbs. anti-religion
6 tbl spoons humor
4 oz. finely ground egotism
a dash of insanity
and a pinch of "Bob"

Blend well and serve with disbelief

_________________
Reverend DJ Epoch

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: mshotz@aol.comnospam (James T. Rex King of the Monsters)

>3 pints sarcasm
>3 lbs. cynicism
>4 lbs. anti-religion
>6 tbl spoons humor
>4 oz. finely ground egotism
>a dash of insanity
>and a pinch of "Bob"
>
>Blend well and serve with disbelief
>

I like more insanity in mine, plus a large dash of Nyphomanian or Satyrinsm

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

"You remind Me a Song I can't name, in time I don't remember, in a place I
don't think I've ever been to."

Grampa Simpson

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Slackitude <allyerslack@here.there>

Don't forget that little thing called "love". It's what makes
home cooking so good. Oh, and some boobs.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Didn't you leave out the pain and misery and death, and the headache
that lasts all year?

Oh that's right, you never were on staff actually. Lucky bastard.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote in news:150920021318577685%
stang@subgenius.com:

> Oh that's right, you never were on staff actually. Lucky bastard.
>

The one true tenent of slack that I have discovered in the nearly half-
century I've been on this mudball is...

Don't get into management. You really have to do stuff then, make up
stuff when the shit hits the fan, and you automatcally become the judas
goat when things go wrong or the bigwigs needs a fall guy.

_________________
Reverend DJ Epoch

Favorite saying of the executives to middle management...
"Bend over.. I'LL DRIVE!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nikolai kingsley" <nikolai@broadway.net.au>

> Didn't you leave out the pain and misery and death, and the headache
> that lasts all year?
>
> Oh that's right, you never were on staff actually. Lucky bastard.

"on staff" sounds like some creepy scientologist term. 'he was "on staff"
until his head exploded' sort of thing.

nikolai
---
still working on the S-meter

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: El Queso <the_cheese_23@yahoo.com>

(smacks lips) mmmmm.... Mine needs more ego.
Queso

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@subgenius.com>

"Reverend DJ Epoch" <nunyabiz@noway.com> wrote in message
news:Xns928A42996B092nunyabiznowaycom@216.148.53.99

> 6 tbl spoons humor

What's so funny about spoons?

--
So, the proper signature delimiter is the way mine is ("-- ") and not
the way yours is ("--"). -- Some Linux Freak

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: fossil_1984@hotmail.com (chaosisrael)

Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com> wrote in message news:<Xns928A42996B092nunyabiznowaycom@216.148.53.99>...
> 3 pints sarcasm
> 3 lbs. cynicism
> 4 lbs. anti-religion
> 6 tbl spoons humor
> 4 oz. finely ground egotism
> a dash of insanity
> and a pinch of "Bob"
>
> Blend well and serve with disbelief
>
> _________________
> Reverend DJ Epoch

I'd switch the amounts on humor & sarcasm, and make cynicism "to taste".

And add about a half bushel of "disagreement".

--
Friendly or otherwise.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com>

fossil_1984@hotmail.com (chaosisrael) wrote in
news:5f05090e.0209152134.39418180@posting.google.com:

> I'd switch the amounts on humor & sarcasm, and make cynicism "to
> taste".
>
> And add about a half bushel of "disagreement".
>
> --
> Friendly or otherwise.
>

Hey, you want to go all Galloping Gourmet on us, fine. All recipes are
subject to the individual cook's tastes.

Dammit, I forgot the GARLIC! That explains that missing "something"...

Yours needs more paprika. HTH.
_________________
Reverend DJ Epoch

Next week, we whip up a batch of Martha Stewart Sourballs...

"BAM!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>

> --
> Friendly or otherwise.

My recipe calls for 1/2 cup each of piss and vinegar, but
maybe that's a western thing.

--
John Starrett

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Nickie" <nickie@subgenius.com>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote in news:150920021318577685%
stang@subgenius.com:

> Didn't you leave out the pain and misery and death, and the headache
> that lasts all year?
>
> Oh that's right, you never were on staff actually. Lucky bastard.

You forgot to mention the irritable bowel syndrome coupled with the
unwanted attention from people who live in thier mothers' basements.

I wonder if the two are related?

-Rev. Nickie

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <Xns928B7B93FBE0Dnickiesubgeniuscom@66.150.105.111>, Rev.
Nickie <nickie@subgenius.com> wrote:

> "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com> wrote in news:150920021318577685%
> stang@subgenius.com:
>
> > Didn't you leave out the pain and misery and death, and the headache
> > that lasts all year?
> >
> > Oh that's right, you never were on staff actually. Lucky bastard.
>
>
> You forgot to mention the irritable bowel syndrome coupled with the
> unwanted attention from people who live in thier mothers' basements.
>
> I wonder if the two are related?
>

AHAHAHA!!! AHAHAHA!!!! AHAHAHAHA!!! (BFOOMNL)

I had the irritable bowel since childhood so I can't relate it to
SubGenius Foundation work related health complaints. You can't claim
workman's comp on that one, Nickie.

However, I think the attention from people who live in their mom's
basements might be a source of the high blood pressure and opthalmic
migraines. Each new SubGenius Foundation employee has to learn to stop
pitying the Momma's Morlocks, and evolve up to simply EXPLOITING THEM
for THEIR PARENT'S MONEY and THEIR OWN GOOD.

"Better Us Than Heaven's Gate," that's my motto.

Ironically enough I am actually planning to move back to my Mom's
basement, in a decade or so. Except... except... my Mom doesn't have a
basement. Guess we'll just have to move her out to the shed.

Back to document index

Original file name: Recipe for SubGenius.txt - converted on Friday, 13 June 2003, 22:39