Akron Devival

From: iDRMRSR <alex.i.thymia@depression.org>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Mon, Aug 12, 2002 2:01 AM

Aside from being in Akron, this was perhaps one of the wellest polished
gems of a Devival I have been at. No offense to past Devivals, but they
just keep getting better and better. You have to have a REASON to go to
Akron, and that being the case, it was old buds night fer sure, all of
us united under the same reason. Stang was about to give the basic Bob
sermons, but such a large percentage of the audience were dyed in the
wool over their own eyes Subgenii, that was unnecessary. So he could
launch into the Advanced Concepts part of the class and delve into the
pure ontology of the SubGenius way.

With all the respect I can muster, and I am too much of a gentleman to
say this to someone in person, the award for best tits goes to Jacklyn
Hyde. If Connie ever wanted to impress mankind on this evening, she did
it through those breasts, which glowed peach under the houselights and
at times overflowed the straps of whatever unseen garment was supporting
them, like the Bread of Life rising in a warm kitchen. Oh, I don't mean
to denigrate the many other wonderful tits in the room, but there was
something special about these mammae in that setting that touched a part
of my soul, and as a consequence, I spent the evening entranced by them
and don't really know what the fuck else might have been going on there.

Fortunately, as a silver hair, I have long ago mastered the stealth
lear. And a person of my appearance doesn't get noticed that much,
providing a sort of shroud of invisibility. No trickle of saliva
betrayed my surveillance of those breasts, I trust, but if it did, I
apologize. Pra'Connie.

Greets to Sinph. SexMortus, Jimbo, Geo, Chris Lee, Rev. Toth, Legume,
Stang, Princess Wei, Phloigd, Onan Canobite, Saint N and Helena, and the
other SubG's whose names may have been erased from my mind through the
apricot emanations of those tatas.

It's late now, and I must re-enter the Pink world in the morning, else I
would have posted what pictures I did take. I was able to photograph
perhaps the first half hour of the Devival, and then through a strange
tilt of the Luck Plane, dislodged the batteries from my camera and lost
them on the ground. I took this as a sign from Bob that I should sit on
my remarkable puffy ass and ENJOY the thing, and let the others take the
pictures this time. And so I did, along with the cleavage. What shots
I did take will find their way to ABS later today.

[*]
-----

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

You'll be glad to know that the Sacred Cleavage of The Rabbi that
particular night is well documented. Hopefully a.b.s. will be aglow
with those particular uberdugs soon.

Also, the portraits from 5X-Day that Wei shot, on SubSITE, include a
couple of truly stunning shots of The Rabbi, including the ones of her
astride the Big Blue Bonobo at Tranquility Base, that will recapture
the moment for you.

The Old Non Profit Pornographer

P.S. I'm the most happily married guy in the world, but my EYEBALLS are
uncontrollable AMORAL VIRTUAL RAPISTS, and between just the mere SKIN
TONES of Rev. Ennie, Acolyte Rachel, the BOUNCER, Rabbi, the Akron
Babes, Rev. Samantha (the super-perky DEVO girl), (insert your
Connieite name here), Rev. Sinzia, Joy deVeeve, Televangela and of
course Doctor Pissoff, I didn't have nearly enough eyes, and they
threatened to blow my skull aprt what with all their wild greedy
swiveling and bugging.

Does anybody have any compromising pictures of Dr. Pissoff? He's gotta
be the hottest thing since Popeye's Pappy. I noticed Cletus what having
a time keeping Acolyte Rachel off of that randy old buzzard.

Pilmer needs to bid-dog that Jennifer gal too. There's a LOT of
bird-doggin' that has to be maintained by the males at these devivals,
lately. You can imagine how alert I have to be when that dog, Rev.
Chris Lee, is around. Or Dr. Legume. Or ANY of the ESO drummers. I'm
telling you. Any SubGenius male lucky enough to have it, had better
treat it like ROYALTY lest another SubGenius boy (or GIRL!) move in and
hypnotize it right outa your sweaty little paws before you even know
what happened.

Those boys are some DOGS. They are some DIRTY DOGS.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nikolai kingsley" <nikolai@broadway.net.au>

> P.S. I'm the most happily married guy in the world, but my EYEBALLS are
> uncontrollable AMORAL VIRTUAL RAPISTS...

just 'cause you've acquired a target doesn't mean you should retire the
targeting system. sorry, i've been playing Freespace 2 a lot recently.

nikolai
---
"Incoming fighters - hostile signatures!"
"oh hush up."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde" <rabbs@subgenius.com>

"iDRMRSR" <alex.i.thymia@depression.org> wrote in message
news:40B103EBCA5EBCFF.8A4539D3143DFCBD.44FD3C698D08889B@lp.airnews.net...
>
> With all the respect I can muster, and I am too much of a gentleman to
> say this to someone in person, the award for best tits goes to Jacklyn
> Hyde.

I'll just leave out the rest of that paragraph so I can finally stop
blushing, which is ridiculous because I'm by myself back in my apartment in
suburban Philly. What a COMPLIMENT!!! Of course, most of you guys missed
that Legume managed to rip the zipper to my blouse completely down until I
was almost topless. What can I say? The guy was too quick and I was
tuckered out.
That being said, thank you to just about all the folks there for making it
such a fun time! It was worth the schlep out to Ohio. Special thanks to
Bob the Drummer for being a wonderful host, to Toth for throwing an
extraordinary party, SExmortus for licking the beer off my boots, Stang for
almost making me care about "Bob", and the lovely Uncle Onan for being there
(you have no idea how much you were missed).
Okay, NYC guys, you now have a massive challenge on your hands! Try to get
CLOSE to that level!!!

--With love, the Rabbs

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Reverend Sinphaltimus Exmortus" <RevSExmortus@nyc.rr.com>

"Rabbi Jacklyn Hyde" <rabbs@subgenius.com> wrote in message
news:oHX59.2718$tI4.1108705@monger.newsread.com...
just leave out the rest of that paragraph so I can finally stop

> Of course, most of you guys missed
> that Legume managed to rip the zipper to my blouse completely down until I
> was almost topless. What can I say? The guy was too quick and I was
> tuckered out.

--I have to say, not only was I standing right there, not only did I see it
happen, not only did I spontaneously spooge, crap, sneaze, fart, piss,
laugh, cry and burp, all at the same time, but I was nearly blinded by the
beacons of beauty and nearly did I pass out. I had to leave immediately
after that...

Sincerely yours, forever Bob's,

The Reverend Sinphaltimus Exmortus
of the
First Ever Digital Church of Mind Slack
http://www.Digital-Church.com
A Totally Independent Clench of
The Church of the SubGenius
THE SUBGENIUS FOUNDATION
PO BOX 204206
AUSTIN, TX 78720-4206
Send $1 and S.A.S.E. for more info
or visit www.subgenius.com
or email RevSExmortus@nyc.rr.com
or die pink or kill me
"Exterminate all rational thought" W.S.B.
16*2*!!

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Original file name: Akron Devival - iDRM.txt - converted on Thursday, 29 May 2003, 16:43