Kookaloopy: The Asimov Factor

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Reply-To: like.excess@sex.org
Date: Mon, Oct 15, 2001 1:45 PM

(taken from the Yahoo! "spynews" group)

...A couple of weeks ago I asked a friend of mine,
Russian writer and Afghan war veteran Vladimir
Grigoriev to find out if "The Foundation", a 1951
sci-fi bestseller by Isaac Asimov, a well-known
American author and scientist, was translated and
published in Arabic, and if so, under what title?
Yesterday, I learned that my friend contacted his
former professor Olga Frolova, currently the Chair
of the Arab Philology Department, School of Oriental
Languages, St. Petersburg State University, and she
confirmed that the book was published in Arabic as
"Al Qaeda", the title matching the name of the
international terrorist network founded and headed
by Osama bin Laden. (The Western media usually
translates "Al Qaeda" back as "The Base", as if a
base of terrorists were been referred to.)

This peculiar coincidence would be of little interest
if not for abundant parallels between the plot of
Asimov's book and the events unfolding now. The
central character of "The Foundation" named Seldon,
the pioneer of a new scientific discipline called
"psychohistory", predicts that the Galactic Empire is
about to fall. While the process of disintegration
cannot not be stopped, Seldon decides to send an
expedition to a remote place on the outskirts of the
Galaxy and establish The Foundation, which is to
become the nucleus of the next Empire. Even though the
Old Empire tries to destroy The Foundation with its
superior military might, Seldon's plan eventually
works despite many predicted difficulties and
occasional random hiccups. Seldon does not live long
enough to see the triumph of his cause, but he leaves
videotaped messages at a machine timed to broadcast
them to his followers and instruct them at the turning
points of The Foundation's history, as his forecasts
are coming true.

--
*
Moesha seizes a fresh slice of chef Elise's
greasy fish quiche and mischievously mashes
and squishes it on the Joseph piece of the
fascist police chief's cheezy French crèche.
*
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Kookaloopy: The Asimov Factor
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack

That comparison had occured to me just the other day. I never read
Asimov's Foundation stuff but I just finished the first of the
"prequels", by Greg Benford (David Brin and Greg Bear are also each
doing one (or have done 'em, I dunno).

I of course prefer to think of the Church of the SubGenius as the true
"alternate future Conspiracy", not Al Queda, or El Queso, or however
you spell it.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Kookaloopy: The Asimov Factor
From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
>

Hmmm...if the Church of the SubGenius is the
"Foundation"...

...Well, from that you could extrapolate
PSYCHLOHISTORY(!), where there is a merger
between the Church of the SubGenius and
Scient*l*gy to produce the EVIL HEMPIRE!

(While secretly "Bob" creates a SECOND CHURCH
OF THE SUBGENIUS! which secretly runs the
EVIL HEMPIRE! into the ground in a secretive
manner by secreting itself in the sacred
secretions or something which can be figured
out as we go along.)

Just remember The secret to all Asimov novels:

He did this, then, he did this, then, he did
this, then, he did this, then, he did this...

From: Tesla Coil <tescoil@irtc.net>

Report after report describes Osama bin Laden as a
cave dweller who uses high tech to wreak havoc on
the surface world and eludes capture by vanishing
into an extensive network of underground tunnels.

Asimov? You better fix the holes in your tin foil
hats--this is right outta Richard Shaver...
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: andreux <andreux@eterna.net>

nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote in news:3BCCC97F.4FD@succeeds.com:

>
> (While secretly "Bob" creates a SECOND CHURCH
> OF THE SUBGENIUS! which secretly runs the
> EVIL HEMPIRE! into the ground in a secretive
> manner by secreting itself in the sacred
> secretions or something which can be figured
> out as we go along.)

C'mon now... Can you REALLY see our
beloved Stang bein' drinkin' buddies with
David Miscarriage?

Let's think seriously now...

First off, the love child would be HIDEOUS.

-st. andreux
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

Isn't it an essential element of a conspiracy that
its outcome is grotesque? Who would take a conspiracy
*seriously* if it promised freedom of speech, peace,
equality, prosperity for all, cultural benevolence
and inclusion?

Naw, it's gotta be a ruthless, vicious, anti-lifeform,
mind twisting, sexually inhibited, cynical, corrupt,
diseased, bureaucratic dictatorship to even *qualify*
as a CONspiracy.

Picture "Lord Stang", wearing the Sci*ntolog*st
security service uniform, except decked out to make
him look like a Haitian admiral. He is sitting on a
golden throne, surrounded by adoring scantily-dressed
women as he snaps his fingers and a giant Nubian with
a scimitar comes forward to behead a messenger who has
failed him by bringing the news that profits for that
year are only up 2000%

I'm sure Reverend Stang could picture himself thusly.

Come to think of it, so could I.

--
*
Moesha seizes a fresh slice of chef Elise's
greasy fish quiche and mischievously mashes
and squishes it on the Joseph piece of the
fascist police chief's cheezy French crèche.
*

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Original file name: Kookaloopy- The Asimov Factor - converted on Thursday, 20 December 2001, 03:31