A Blockbuster

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack

BLOCKBUSTER war movie Pearl Harbor is to have a
different ending for Japanese audiences - to keep
the old enemy happy. In a strange departure from
reality, the Japanese will be depicted as having
won World War II.

The German version of the most expensive film ever
is also being re-written, having them winning the
European war, thus explaining their current
domination of the European Union.

Producers are ditching a closing speech by Brit
Kate Beckinsale, 27, telling how the US bounced
back from the cowardly Japanese raid on the
American fleet at Pearl Harbor to win the war.
Instead they will be substituting a defiant speech
by an actor portraying Emperor Hirohoto, after an
imaginary event, the supposed successful repulsion
of the U.S. Japanese ground invasion. There is no
mention of the use of the atomic bomb, which was
seen as too depressing.

The decision came after Disney chiefs canvassed
people worldwide to see if anyone would be offended.

A source said: "We've tried very hard not to portray
the Japanese in a very bad light. We're not the
History Channel, we're in it for the money.

"Japan is a huge market and accounted for 20 per cent
of profits for Titanic.

"The film barely refers to the Germans but we have
changed things to make them happy, too.

"It won't make a big difference, most people know
who won the war. That is, if they were taught that
in high school, like they should have been."

The ending is not the only change for Japan and
Germany. America will be seen as an aggressor
throughout the movie, with Japan and Germany only
seeking to defend themselves.

--
"There is no nu-monet. There is only Zuul."

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Original file name: A Blockbuster - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:35