plug your clench here

From: "The Rev. Doktor Late Budie Holie"
<the_late_budie@hotmail.com???snorkel>

can sombody give me a list of clenches i can join and how i can do so

or you can just tell me which clench you think is the best and why

dont just plug your clench... plug the hell out of it

-- "Bob" was left handed!!!

"Music is the corporealization of the intelligence that is sound."--Edgar Varese

The Late Budie Holie

http://www.mp3.com/latebudie

icq#: 37601999 ----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Pee Kitty" <pkitty@brainpuke.REMOOVE-THIS.com>

Might I suggest rolling your own, friend?

See below...no, you CAN'T join it.

-- Rev. Pee Kitty, of the order Malkavian-Dobbsian Meow!

"Ninety-nine percent of life is what you make of it, so if your life sucks, you suck." -- Mike Muir ----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Christopher Lee <clbundy@indy.net>

There are a slew of clenches, or a clot of clenches, (or is that a murder of clenches? I forget). Out of practicality, most of them are kinda regionally oriented, specific to a city, but possibly with members spread about widely. Some clenches might require lots of tribute and graft, and a very long initiation (trial by fire, trial by water), while others might be ready to accept any old chump in order to booster their membership.

A bit about The Church of Homer Simpson, Boddhissatva, also known as the Quijibo Cartel, or the Stonecutters. (We also have our military unit- The Fightin' Hellfish). Formed in 1996 or so, our numbers doubled when St. Mykal D'Arkangel joined in 1998. Since then we have brought aboard DJ Deakon Devolver, and the members of the band Number Six, until they decide to schism. We also have Dkr. Armand Geddyn, our Special Liason to the Ministry of Truth (which is one of our Vaguely Defined Allied Clenches). And oh heck, I'm gonna include Susie the Floozie as a member too, cause I don't think she reads alt.slack often enough to correct me. So, yeah, her too.

The Church of Homer Simpson follows the teachings of the Holy Trinity- Homer Simpson, Prof Frink, and Ralph Wiggums, and the prophets Grampa Abraham Simpson, and Cletus, the Slack-Jawed Yokel. Actually, it is believed that Number Six's drummer is the earthly avatar/manifestation of Cletus. Other members of our pantheon include St. Fred Sanford, St. Godzilla, St. Esquivel, and sometimes Jahweh David Lynch. (one day a year)

Obviously, the main focus of the Clench is our church newsletter QUIJIBO. It is published more or less quarterly, which means it appears about 32x more frequently than any other SubGenius zine. For more information, consult the website: www.walkingdead.com/~quijibo or just send your love offerings to:

Quijibo

18 W. Main, Suite X

Greenfield, IN 46140

Other activities of the Quijibo Cartel have included: hosting the swingingest cocktail lounge this side of Dobbstown: the Quijibo-A-Go-Go, and operating our own micro-micro-almost-sub-atomic brewery. We also provide archival space for the Documentarian libraries, and are the current curators of the Ark of the Slack Covenent.

Something like that, anyways.

Rev. Dr. Christopher Li

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Sister Decadence <decadence@subgenius.com>

My clench is so strong, so powerful, I can make Doc Frop come just by clenching.

Oh wait, you meant....never mind.

Sister Decadence

Goodwill Ambassador

Church of the Subgenius

http://www.walkingdead.net/~quijibo/sister_d

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

http://walkingdead.net/~phxclench/

we commit crimes against man and nature.

think of us as the "provisional wing" now that the holocaustals have been neutralized.

I'm gonna revise that webpage one of these days. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: SWILBERT® <nenslo@subgenius.com>

The Rev. Doktor Late Budie Holie wrote:

"Bob" was left handed!!!

Whaddya mean WAS. ----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Popess Lilith von Fraumench <lilith@ZubJenius.com>

as soon as my ordainment supplies finaly come in, im probably gonna have to choose a clench

Or start your own.

can someody give me a list of clenches i can join and how i can do so

or you can just tell me which clench you think is the best and why

dont just plug your clench... plug the hell out of it

If I plugged my clench and you didn't at least live in Washington state, I'd be embarrassed.

However, I am otherwise quite into clench-plugging, and if you start your own clench, I'll plug yours REAL SWEET-LIKE.

The Plugger Lilith

-- =====Her Ladyship Rev Dkr St Popess Lilith von Fraumench, Esquire=====
===Prophet--Devivor--Corrective Phrenologist--XXX-Day Stage Manager===
==http://ssucc.ragnarokr.com===http://foolspress.com===(887)381-9354==
==Inside the heart of every genius lurks a tard yearning to be free.==
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Popess Lilith von Fraumench <lilith@ZubJenius.com>

In article <pfb2ns4c4vtmpv1r0q4enc97d1n6f3tc4r@4ax.com>, bubbleghost <bubbleghost@hushhushmail.com> wrote:

On Sat, 15 Jul 2000 20:59:47 GMT, Her Deliciousness <bgeddyn@minitru.org> scrawled upon the shithouse wall that is usenet '

In article <smtaumannd647@corp.supernews.com>, "The Rev. Doktor Late Budie Holie" <the_late_budie@hotmail.com??? snorkel> wrote:

dont just plug your clench... plug the hell out of it.

"The Ministry of Truth (also known as MiniTru, the MoT, and the SubG Fashion Police) exists to pursue two goals during its (brief) time on this Planet of Clocks, Earth Farm One:

1.)Increase public awareness of the Father Church and the reality of Dobbsian Slack.

2.)Expand and enrich the SubGenius demographic.

<snip>

Judging from some of those stories I read about XXX day, a lotta Sub-g's had their demographics expanded and enriched a bit too much.....

Maybe "a bit too much" actually means SOMETHING, in your world, but over here, all we know is that there was an awful lot of hot, sweaty, body-paint-coated CLENCH PLUGGING, and that's what matters.

The Prophet Lilith

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Original file name: plug your clench here - converted on Sunday, 11 March 2001, 14:27