Hour of Slack #1182 - The Lonely Sperm at Christmas - Live Dec.7 '08

59:45

Mostly live from WCSB Cleveland, with Lonesome Cowboy Dave joining Rev. Stang and Princess Wei by phone. Not recommended for the infirm, the very old or the very young. An amazing new sarcastic Christmas song by The Attery Squash is premiered, along with several other bites out of the fresh Xmas apple by LeMur, SODDI, Rev. Norel Pref, Puzzling Evidence, and Synaesthesia. The Obituaries become a regular feature on the show, as everyone ages inexorably.

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The Radio Synaesthesia show from WCSB Cleveland used herein is from July 2008 with Dr. Hal, Lonesome Cowboy Dave, Stang, Priestess Pisces, Rocknar, and host Dr. Sinister

Below, "PE" means Puzzling Evidence show on KPFA-Berkeley from 10-17-2008

1          Intro Toyland Reviw  00:18

2          LeMur: PR Gnus #1426  00:30

3           SODDI: 70bobgateloop            00:27

4          Bob - Ring of Terror-MST3K            00:04

5          LeMur: HOS Intro #820 - Record That Which is None of Our Business            00:22

6          Rev. Sweetness McGee: "look inside Bob"            00:44

7          Old Puzzling Evidence - opening            01:09

8          Right  Where  You Are Sitting Now podcast with Stang - Dumbasses & Humans            00:52

9          LeMur: George #02            00:36

10         Toyland Know What 2 Think            00:54

11        LeMur: xmas with Bob 2          00:30

12        The Psycho Skeletons - "Good King Bob"    00:28

13        Rev. Norel Pref: cut me some slack here     00:55

14        Norel cred to Attery            01:08

15        The Attery Squash - "Santa's Laughter Mocks The Poor"   02:51

16        cred Attery 2Large,PE            00:45

17        The Large- "Korrektpraise"            00:33

18         Puzzling Evidence-Xmas_Store!            01:48

19        Toyland EepSongCont            00:39

20        Live Yak - Stang's One Sperm Cell      37:51 (see below)

21        Radio Synesthesia 12-11-05-XMAS            06:12

Main Yak with Dave. Wei, Stang

X on your forehead vs. sex on forehead. Xists vs Sexists. Xmas coming - Elves are demonic beings - Detroit elves are in trouble - Santa, as largest most human elf, fattened by fruits of the labors of others - Illuminati elves -  Santa's ley lines and UFOs - Blixon the lying reindeer - Presidents famous for lying, dribbling, drooling -  Dave supposed to be doing homework - Dave's classes in classic drama vs modern communication - Dave wrote scripts, NOW takes lessons - all he needs is Photo of "Bob", brings succor better than roof or food. He's cool, hot. No more head launchings anymore - except the kids who take everything literally. When Dobbsheads fly, when frogs rain - caught in hailstorm in cloudless summer day. Jehovah's Witnesses, frogs all bait for Elder Fisher Gods. We are being shopped for. And Bob is the ad agency trying to sell us. DobbsCo, BobCo, ConBo.com. Monitors in station shows Yahoo news. Headline: Giant Potato World Record! Could usher in 2nd Coming - or is TaterChrist itself. We're small potatoes here. Superspud news. A munitions mutate. Mutate is new word for mutant. Mutatertots. Luckily I'll be dead but grandson will see Death of Oceans, Last Bonobo. IF they can afford to be plugged into the Matrix then. 

Bonobos - sexier than the ocean. The Bonobo estrus cycle and the red cabbagey thing on their behind. This is science, not porn. Girls like vaginal farts. Dave vanished in ether like vegetable. Wei hot for cabbage. Vegetable love names. Bonobos - signpost for humanity - the SPERM COUNT is half what our Pappy's was. Stang has one sperm left, saving it for important moment. Let go! Can't kick it out of nest - raised, named sperm - hasn't learned to fly, or impregnate - empty test syndrome - it's my last one. I'm almost blind, shave palms, but still have that one sperm left. Polly the Pollywog. Do baby sperms come from Mommy and Daddy sperms? Chopped up like planarian worms? Behind every sperm is an ovary. The Eternal Battle -- the fight that's so much fun. The beast with two backs fighting for its life. Dave ergo therefore i.e. ergot.

The meat of knowledge poured from the wisdom teat of the radio. Breast milk of the radio airwaves. Those who sit through this show should get a diploma at the end. We sand off edges of the shows. Other shows bruise organs. HoS bounces easily in. Except gives Stang daughter headache. The day I was being irritating to my daughter - that's all they remember. Selective memory - kids mad at you for giving them life. Until they're kicked from nest. My one sperm has that teenage attitude. Wears clown outfits to be cool. When sperm gets married to ovary, loses its freedom, becomes hairy screaming creature. Will have to cut Pollywog loose someday - many sperms die on cold bathroom tile, glue between pages, at best absorbed by ovarywoman and turned into screaming sucking THING! (Stang cries) Dave diaper change

Stang does URL and PO box

Dave re Cleveland Lows. Wei comforts him re bad joke. 

Wei already let in Dr. Sinister and Stang didn't notice. Going blind, deaf, no memory, - aliens abducting us one piece at a time. I have an answer for everything stupid. Making something disappear isn't the trick - bringing it BACK is the trick - the prestige. Two tiny birds, one dies, one flies. That's how The Con in your head works. Holds out 2 things --

 "I don't believe anything until I need to." -- Pappy.

Dave on Flush Limbaugh. Stang tries to get pills from Dave. "I need about 100,000 of them . I'm a conservative talk show host - I have pain." Stang is eating JOLT mint with caffeine. 10 bottles of Nyquil - a lot of dextromethorphan. "I have THAT! We are from Brazil. Do you have children? May I inspect them. I have THAT. We are doctors. We have THAT."

Now for obituaries - lost 2 famous monsters this week. Forrest J. Ackerman, Beverly Garland. Stang's Forry experience. Exchanged glands with Forrest Ackerman. Beverly a B Girl. "The Bee Girl vs the Wasp Woman." As show gets older, obituary becomes a more regular part of the program. The greats of bulldada are dropping like flies.

We the heroes of this show are about to die and go to other show. We're hanging up - Dave and his hang-ups.    

20        Radio Synesthesia 12-11-05-XMAS            06:12

Background music in credits: Lamprey Systems

http://www.lamprey-systems.com/

Dr. Hal Robins: http://askdrhal.com and http://piratecatradio.com

The Amino Acids: http://theaminoacids.com

Rev. Norel Pref: http://norelpref.com

Rev. Susie the Floozy and "Bob's" Slacktime Funhouse, WREK, MP3 podcast: http://tinyurl.com/gpyba

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